AIBU to hope this sad story gives charities that emply cold callers pause for thought.

[MythicalKings]

www.theguardian.com/uk-news/2015/may/14/bristol-pensioner-body-avon-gorge-olive-cooke

Over 200 begging letters in a month from charities and frequent cold callers asking for money.

It's horrific. I know how persuasive they can be, there ought to be a way to opt out of receiving charity calls and letters.

I tell a lie it was actually World Vision. I have had nothing but a great experience with Action Aid and no hassle.

I simply refuse to give any money to any charity other than on an anonymous cash basis. On the odd occasions I've given money on any more formal basis it's always been abused, so I came to the conclusion that all charities are bastards until proven otherwise. Luckily, most of them behave so badly in other ways that I don't feel any difficulty: for example, Amnesty have now become an organisation that works with violent extremists and Greenpeace assist tax evaders to avoid income tax by paying for their entirely artificial commuting, so it's hardly a difficult decision to tell their respective chuggers to fuck off.

The only time I would ever respond positively to a phonecall from a charity is if I had already donated to them and they were asking for confirmation that they can recover the GiftAid on it, which costs me nothing as the government gives it to them out of income tax I've already paid.

My dad had phonecalls for years. They were still ringing on the day he died. They told my brother they were sorry for his loss but was he interested in donating. Dad refused to pick the phone up unless he knew the number and I can see why now.

I have too many direct debits to charities. Dh and I get flustered and agree just to make people leave us alone. We are in our 70s and not really hard up but I wish I could get rid of some of them. Can you just ask the bank to stop paying them?

Can you just ask the bank to stop paying them?

Yes. Don't bother telling the charity. Just cancel them with your bank. You can do it online, if you do online banking: just click and cancel.

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The only problem is that the charities will then just phone up thegreylady and say that there's been a problem and if she and her DH have agreed just to get rid of them in the past, there might still be difficulties there. Is there anything additionally she can do? (I don't actually know, myself - I just don't answer home phones unless I'm expecting a specific call.)

poor woman.

This is why I go through life muttering "fuck off" to everyone and refusing to make eye contact.

Anthony Nolan used my details from registering as a donor to call me and ask for a donation.

They let me think I'd been matched for about five minutes until they mentioned a direct debit. I politely said no. That called back the day after and the day after that- for nine days until I threatened to take my name off the register. Then it stopped (am still on the list if anyone needs my decrepit bone marrow btw)

My usual response to charity collectors was "so sorry but I hate charity". That used to shut them up!

I use an even better one now..when I realise they are from a charity I interrupt them and say "oh brilliant...I'm skint right now and really struggling, what can you offer me?" The look on their faces is priceless.

The only problem is that the charities will then just phone up thegreylady and say that there's been a problem

Indeed. Buy an answering machine if you don't already have one and screen the calls?

I ask them for money.

I bet you do!

Telling them you have been made bankrupt yesterday and therefore cannot donate usually works brilliantly.

Tell them you're a nihilist and all charity is pointless.

A young girl knocked on the door recently and said she was raising awareness for deaf kids in the area on behalf of the NDCS. She then asked if I knew any deaf kids. I said, yes, my son. She was surprised for some reason (why when she was raising awareness for deaf kids in the area, surely she would stumble upon one or two while she went round said area!). Anyhoo, I said the NDCS were great for me when he was first diagnosed and she said how lovely, take care and bye bye! She was a nice chugger!

I used to donate to the NDCS but then I couldn't afford it. When I first started donating a guy rang me on my mobile and went on and on about the weekends away organised by the NDCS for the families of newly diagnosed children. I kept saying "yes, I know, I have been invited on those for my own DEAF SON!" He carried on until DH took the phone off me to say that I was a bit busy. That man was a persistent chugger.

But targeting old people just isn't bloody well on. FFS.

I get so irritated by all the chuggers in the town centers by me!
You can't even go up the high street without being stopped by atleast 3 of them! Some even stand right outside the center doors.
You try to dodge them and they block your path.
I always try to be polite and say no thankyou but they don't take no for an answer!
Some follow you up the street!
"Don't you care about the animals" well yes but i'v got enough of my own and being sick i'v no money as it is, they should be giving me money!

I've tried various phrases and settled on "I'm not in a position to increase my giving at the moment". (Followed by "I'm afraid that's none of your business", if pressed on the details.)

I do give to charities and review who and how much either every year or when my income/outgoings change significantly (maternity leave etc) and a couple of years ago started doing standing orders instead of direct debits for regular payments. It's a bit more faffy to set up as you usually can't do it via the charity's own website and have to contact a physical person for bank details. But, standing orders are for fixed amounts and can't be changed by the recipient whereas in theory they can change the amount and interval of a direct debit without your express permission (as long as they've given you warning). I think it must also be unusual enough that you don't appear on any of their mailing lists because I've never had a cold call. apart from by post from the Red Cross, a charity I've never given to. Please stop sending me pens

My response is a standard, "I never give to charities that pay fundraisers."

I'm still so angry for that poor woman this morning. A lifetime of giving and helping others to end in such a way is a terrible thing.

I'm minded to mention her to every cold caller and send a copy of the newspaper reports back to the charities in the pre paid envelope.

I have had to tell my mum that these people are selling a product like double glazing. Your heart might be touched by the product. That doesn't mean it isnâ??t just a product to them.
In my work I have dealt with some charities on the ethics of marketing and they are horrendous and arrogant.
You choose who you want to give hard earned money to and that is that.

They started as a charity, they are not that anymore.

I'm going to buck the trend and say that a few charities were great when I let them know that I had to cancel my direct debits due to a change in circumstances. I had a very nice mail from Oxfam about how much I'd helped over the years, and a really lovely mail from another women's organisation with whom I had a previous relationship, to express their best wishes for my well-being (I think someone there put two and two together about a change of address and a change of circumstances and worked out what was going on - possibly because it was a women's organisation).

Big charities are bullys, they are never happy with what yoiu give and constantly ask you to raise your direct debit no matter what it was.

My nan was giving to 18 charities when she died, got loads of stuff in the post always asking for more.