Tories raising VAT to 80% on nappies and privatising Cebeebies

[OnTheRoadToLTB]

I can't provide a link right now (silly phone), but what do you guys think of these Tory policies? They kept that quiet, didn't they?

I am raging.

Shocking, just what I'd expect from the Tory's though, they don't call them the nasty party for no reason you know.

Yeah right.

AstroTurf strikes again.

Aren't they also taking everyone's first born to be groomed into being the next generation of Tory MP's (sorry, on phone can't do link )

I hear the SNP want to rebuild Hadrian's wall.

Or was it UKIP who want to build a wall all the way around the English Channel?

They would if they could.

Labour are going to raise income tax to 100% on any member of the Bullingdon club.

It's not as bad as the Green's proposal to introduce a birth tax. Parents will be taxed at 90% of their earnings until each child is 18, the tax is per child so if you have 2 children you will be taxed at 180% of your income. If you don't have enough money to pay the tax you must sell your house and move to a tax-payer funded commune where you must take compulsory lessons in saving the whale and lentil weaving.

I heard they were going to make all the foreign born doctors and dentists return to their country of origin by the end of the year and set up a YTS workfare scheme to make umemployed British people do the job instead in exchange for their benefits.... or was that UKIP?

Orlando thank you for bringing that to my attention. Fantastic policy.

I hear Ed Milliband will make himself the new Head of the Church if he wins and UKIP will throw out all the Doctors who can't prove their British ancestry to 3 generations back.
David Cameron will close all hospitals and make children leave school at 9 to work in factories.
Tis all true.

I heard the SNP want compulsory haggis for free school meals and bagpipe playing at the start of all assemblies.

Can't link - am on phone

Shocked, just shocked... Someone be telling me that they going to calve the pledges onto stone and put it on downing street garden soon! What next...

Lol Poor old Chopin on the other thread - she must have thought we had all come down in the last shower!

Apparently, you haven't read the newest one... UKIP will be checking sizes of children upon enrolment in school - the smallest will automatically be diverted to cumpulsory chimney sweep training.

It's really not funny to post these tasteless threads. You might think it's okay to laugh at the poor, sick and disabled being hit the most harshly by cuts. You might think it's funny that people are being killed by Tory policy, you might think it's funny that people are truly scared of them getting back in, but it's really not.

Oh, and Plaid Cymru will be rationing the use of vowels - incentives will be made to develop new words to further terrify non-Welsh speakers.

I'd link, but am on phone.

Callme...makes sense that! All those chimneys arent going to sweep themshelves. Its a huge loophole. Im surprised none of the other parties havent thought of that!

Fairy - this is just about the funniest thread I have read in a while... with all the political bun fights going on in MN right now, perhaps a lighthearted chuckle at the cost of ALL parties is just the tonic.

Never you worry - there is a magical way to fix this. Hide the thread.

And just because you are so special, here is my very first

I hope the Conservatives haven't seen Oliver recently. That might give them some ideas.

I've heard a UKIP candidate plans to shoot a Conservative rival between the eyes if he ever becomes Prime Minister.

Oh, wait a minute ... I haven't quite got the hang of this have I?

Fairy, nobody is having a laugh at the expense of the electorate. We are having a laugh at the expense of the politicians and the posters posting made up scaremongering tosh.

UKIP plan to bring back treadmills to prisons to power turbines to generate power.

Or was that the Conservatives?

Nope sorry you can't better Ed carving policies reminders in stone.

Fucking Moses. london agree couldn't make that loonacy up.

Loving the UKIP chimney sweep idea callMe

Apparently the Tories are thinking of privatizing trees so that every time a leaf falls off a tree the person whose garden it lands in has to pay a leaf tax of £100 which will be invested in building a nuclear power station in the local park.

Likewise Labour are planning on introducing a "Waitrose tax", but not the store, the word, so if any of their community policepeople hear a person say "Waitrose" they are immediately fined £67.30 and all fines are invested in building a sauna in the local bank for Muslim transexual single parents.