To be ashamed dh is voting conservative

[Jacobsmum1972]

I'm very left wing dh is centre right Aibu to not want friends or family finding this out.

I just found out who dp voted for (postal) and I was so relieved it wasn't Tory or ukip!

I think I would've loved him a bit less if he had so YANBU

The op has said she's being lighthearted. You can all stop frothing

Politics is very important to me. I don't think I could bear to look at a dp that bored ukip and conservative is just as bad in my book

I'm not frothing. But the simplistic equation people so often make between holding Labour/left wing views and being a nice person grates, however 'lighthearted' it is. Because it gets reiterated all the time, and it's bollocks.

OK you are being lighthearted but..

To be a bit boring here I think as an adult you shouldd have let go of your parental influences by now and be making choices on the basis of this Tory manifesto and your loacl candidate.

I know where you are coming from and it's a lot more sensible to be considering current policies rather than having knee jerk reactions to th Thatcher years. Gleeful "Sanctioning" of people's benefite is reason enough to not vote Tory tbh.

I cannot even begin to tell you how unreasonable you're being.

The way I see it is that many on the left view themselves as fighting the cause of the underdog, or standing up for the less fortunate, those in need even though often they are the groups that suffer as a result of their policies. The problem arises when they (on the left) wrongly assume that those of us on the right are on the "opposite" side and therefore don't care about those people, or worse still, want to actively do them harm. That just isn't the case (for me anyway).

There is an element of "holier than thou" among many on the left, as well as an inability or (worse still) a refusal to consider another point of view. The bitterness and hatred towards those of us that don't share their view is sometimes unbelievable.

I'll be voting Tory (locally at least) and I'll do so proudly.

Although the Labour Treasury twit who left a note saying there's no money left does make me shake my head. There's no party monopoly on good sense or wise decisions.

There is no doult that the former mining areas have been let down by ALL parties including labour. I am hoping that better rail links will help regenerate these areas and spread prospertity to ex mining regions. Blair and his cronies did nothing to help the former mining regions develop.

I believe that the destruction of UK manufactoring was caused by competion from the third world rather than any one party. We need a strong education system to help former miners and their families adapt and support themselves. Re opening the pits is not an option. I feel that some control over EU migration is necessary to ensure that there are enough unskilled jobs for everyone who cannot learn a new skill.

I am voting conservative as I feel that the coalition have naviagated the UK through a different part of economy history well. Ideally I would like the lib dems to be in coalition with with the tories, but that is not an option on the ballot paper. I don't like the cuts, but we cannot go on spending money we simply don't have.

It's funny how the op decides to change to "lighthearted" later on in the thread and I don't see anyone frothing just opinions .

The OP decided the thread was lighthearted when it started going in the opposite direction to that which she expected.

Really Tired the argument about manufacturing doesn't hold water when you look at Italy and Germany.

All shades of government have failed to get us a balanced economy or ensure national security in power generation. Too much short termism and worship of the god named "Markets".

This is why the left wing scare me. Trumpet tolerance but actually only tolerate people who share a very narrow range of views.

Cross posted pilates!

I'm not frothing. But the simplistic equation people so often make between holding Labour/left wing views and being a nice person grates, however 'lighthearted' it is. Because it gets reiterated all the time, and it's bollocks.

It's not just that there's no correlation between being left-wing and being nice, I would say there is correlation, but it points in the opposite direction. The belief by left-wingers that they occupy the moral high-ground makes them feel justified in being nasty towards people who don't share their views.

Whereas the right thinks the left is too stupid to have the right policies, the left thinks the right is too evil to have the right polices. In general people behave worse towards the "evil" than the "stupid", so in general the consequence of left-wing beliefs is that your own behaviour towards people with different political beliefs is worse than if you held right-wing views.

Freedom of choice, democracy, blah di blah...

But yes I too would be disappointed if my dh voted conservative.

I guess I want my life partner roughly to see the world the same way I do and would feel he wasn't the man I thought he was if he suddenly became a Tory.

ReallyTired I believe that the destruction of UK manufacturing was caused by competition from the third world rather than any one party.

I think working practices also need to be examined. Your average German worker is statistically more productive than the average UK worker. German workers would probably be disciplined for texting at work or whatever, here its the norm in some places. But the UK is still a massive and rich economy, so it must be doing something right.

I cannot help thinking back to the Ineos crisis, involving the very well paid workforce there (average salary £50,000pa) who caused chaos by striking because a Union official was suspended for using his work time to fraudulently sign up people to the union (dead people, people's family members without their permission and so on). Not only did it risk the jobs of the whole workforce and risk bringing the country to a halt by damaging fuel supplies, what do you think it did for business confidence and attracting investment?

Union influence on the workforce works very well in the Scandinavian countries though, although it is heavily regulated by legislation as to what can and cannot be done.

I have always been the only labour voter in my whole family - they all vote Conservative. I am a changeling . Makes for some interesting debates at election time. Tho I did that online thing about which policies matter to you and it gives you an answer of who to vote for and I got UKIP. Shock horror! However, I have been happy with this govt as things did need to change for the good of the country as a whole and as PP said, I would actually vote in a the same coalition govt if it was an option.

RE the miners being against Tories. Why aren't they worrying about to day and the future though and not what is now decades ago.

I don't think that the suffering of families who live in the ex mining regions is something to be light hearted about. Many people across the political spectrum want to help people in ex mining regions, but they completely disagree how to do it.

The Tories would probably advocate tough love, ie. raising educational standards of children in ex mining regions (aka Gove). They also want it make it tougher to remain on long term benefits. More socialist parties would subsidise the mines which would literally (exuse the pun) be a bottomless pit!

It would be interesting to know if there is anywhere in the world where ex industrial regions have been sucessfully regenerated.

YABU. The idea that couples have to vote the same way as if they have merged into one unthinking blob is absurd! My DH and I almost always vote differently - makes for lively and challenging discussion which I think is a good thing…

Plus - always important to remember that pretty much everyone wants the same thing ultimately (happy, fair, functioning society etc). It's just that different parties have different ideas about the best way to go achieving that.

amicissimma I'm not convinced that it'd be the descendants of those miners who lost their jobs that would be pulling their nuts out today. It'd likely be Eastern Europeans (I suspect)

So Tory voters are all massively tolerant of the left are they?

Yes her husband has a democratic right to vote for who he pleases. The OP isn't removing that right or holding a gun to his head and saying "Vote Labour".

She is entitled to her opinion on his voting choice though.

You all froth on this thread about its a personal choice, shouldn't have a opinion on others vote. Of course you bloody should! It's just so apathetic otherwise. Clearly the OP isn't divorcing her husband over voting Tory but she's allowed to be disappointed.

I think it's unusual when left and right wing people make a couple.

I've met a few right wing people and I've always thought it would be difficult for me to have a friendship with them because of their lack of understanding and compassion. Most seem to be quite selfish and money obsessed. I don't think I've ever met a caring Tory, maybe there are some out there, but I've never met one.

she is entitled to an opinion on his voting choice, but to frame it in the context of being "ashamed" not disappointed is unreasonable, and the OP has been told so.

"Do people who mourn the passing of mining really believe that in a first world country in the 21st century we should be asking people to do hard physical work underground, possibly risking their lives and likely risking their long-term health?"

Why is it worse for people to be miners in the UK than say a third world country? Coal is not going to come out of the ground by itself. Hard physical work is the only option for someone without qualifications to earn a living.

At least the UK has an attempt at health and safety legistation and bans children from working in mines. They also have little things like monitoring gases so that miners do not die from poison gases or are exposed to excessive levels of radiation. They also have mining engineers who endeavour to make sure that miners don't get buried alive.

The strict adherence to rules on safety in the UK makes it harder to compete with other countries who really don't mind if a child loses the odd limb.

I've met a few right wing people and I've always thought it would be difficult for me to have a friendship with them because of their lack of understanding and compassion. Most seem to be quite selfish and money obsessed. I don't think I've ever met a caring Tory, maybe there are some out there, but I've never met one.

As long as you approach people thinking that it will be difficult for you to have a friendship with them (because of a perceived lack of understading, compassion, etc.) then you're unlikely to widen your social circle, or indeed develop your own sense of understading or compassion - and you shall be all the poorer for it.

Our social circle is made up of lots of people, some left wing, some right wing - most of us though are slightly right/left of centre. We all get on and have some lively debate, though that's because we're all respectful of one another. These boards divide opinion in a way which rarely manifests itself in real life - even for those of us that are polically aware.