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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To take my little boys tablet away.

120 replies

Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 15:56

My DS is 6, last night he played on his tab for an hour before bed and when I went up to ask him to get off of it at 9pm he did so, and proceeded to lay down and I tucked him in and went off to my own room to join sleeping DH.

When my DD woke at 12am I got up to see to her and caught my DS on his tab - he must of sneaked on to it!
Anyway he was obviously tired this morning and when I picked him up from school the teacher said he was out of character and he pinched a child in his class - I am mortified! I look like an awful parent now, having a child who acts like that.

Now I know if I take this tablet away before bed, he will scream blue murder and kick the bed and walls for hours on end tonight, I'm worried of the neighbours phoning SS or something (we live on a nice road, we are the only ones with children so a crying child stands out)

Agh I am so stressed!

OP posts:
LurkingHusband · 28/04/2015 15:58

Put a security app on it which only allows it to work between x and y ? It's what we did with our DS computer, and XBox ("family settings").

SweepTheHalls · 28/04/2015 15:58

Put time lock software on it. Ours is called Kids Place I think. The tablet turns off automatically after the allowed amount to of time in one day (1 hour in our house). Saves arguments.

AuntyMag10 · 28/04/2015 15:59

He's 6yo and still kicking and screaming if you take his tablet away, you have bigger issues.

changenaming · 28/04/2015 15:59

'he will scream blue murder and kick the bed and walls for hours on end tonight' really?

WorraLiberty · 28/04/2015 15:59

Kids have tantrums and they cry. It's a fact so don't worry about that.

Either take it away as a punishment for last night's disobedience and put up with the tantrum, or let him have it but take it away when it's time for sleep.

changenaming · 28/04/2015 16:00

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TheBakeryQueen · 28/04/2015 16:01

Actually if this is the first time he has done this then I'd explain calmly why little boys need their sleep (it's when they grow, recharge energy etc), and why he must show that he can be trusted to listen to you.

Then I'd let him play on it if that's his routine, but only for 30 mins maybe? Then 30 mins reading to wind down.

Would that work?

finnbarrcar · 28/04/2015 16:01

You're the parent. Deal with it.

BohemianRaptor · 28/04/2015 16:01

The rule in my house is no screens after 6pm or before homework, however if my 6 year old reacted by kicking walls and screaming there would be a complete ban on screens indefinitely. If you're worried about your neighbours go and warn them.

TheBakeryQueen · 28/04/2015 16:03

Obviously making it clear that you are giving him a chance to be trusted.

hidingfromthem · 28/04/2015 16:03

let him kick and scream blue murder.
don't give into his tantrums.
if you are strong and ignore the meltdowns, he'll learn that acting that way won't get him anywhere.
you will be doing him and you a favour if you be strong and stop letting him be the boss.

base9 · 28/04/2015 16:03

Basic parenting stresses you out? I know we're supposed to report n all but yeah changenaming. Me too.

Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:04

Sorry no I'm not a troll.
I just wanted advice, he can be really hard work and it's wearing me down as he is always kicking and screaming if I upset him, I just want him to listen c

OP posts:
SewingAndCakes · 28/04/2015 16:04

I don't let mine on for an hour before bed as it can cause problems with them sleeping. I don't let them take it to their rooms and play on it in bed either. If your ds tantrums when it's time to come off then he should lose the right to use it the following day in my opinion.

Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:06

We have taken it away previously, but then we have the screaming till he falls asleep - screaming before school about how mean we are, and then crying on the way home from school with the whole ' I know I'm not going to get my tab when we get home'

OP posts:
googoodolly · 28/04/2015 16:06

I wouldn't be letting a six year old have a tablet unsupervised full-stop, and 9pm seems like a very late bedtime for a child of that age. Why does he go to bed so late? No wonder he's tired at school and playing up!

Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:07

It's not basic parenting that stresses me out, I am allowed to get stressed sometimes at things...

OP posts:
Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:08

He just refuses to go to bed any earlier, if we put him up at 7am he'll scream and cry until at least 11pm

OP posts:
Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:08

*7pm not 7am

OP posts:
Minions · 28/04/2015 16:09

Is it unusual to get stressed for basic parenting? Is this not what mumsnet is for? If someone said this like this never stressed them out I'd question whether they're for real. Sorry OP that I've no good advice, the time lock thing sounds like a good idea. Hope it works out.

SewingAndCakes · 28/04/2015 16:09

How long does he get to play on it for? If he's struggling then I think you need to have strict 30mins/1 hour limits each day. I use loss of ipad time as a consequence for my older boys, so I take 5 mins off when they ignore a request/behave badly, and it's remarkable how quickly they start to listen/behave after that.

finnbarrcar · 28/04/2015 16:10

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Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:10

He just doesn't seem to care, he enjoys screaming and crying if I take it away as when we go back in his room to try and calm him he starts smirking..

OP posts:
googoodolly · 28/04/2015 16:11

He sounds very overwhelmed and angry to me. He must be exhausted on that little sleep and tantrumming won't be helping either.

I think he needs firmer boundaries (easier said than done!) and consequences - you haven't mentioned any? What happens when he screams and tantrums for hours on end?

Original poster
Laurenandthebump4 · 28/04/2015 16:11

I don't really understand you finnbarr, how exactly do you take control of a screaming child

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