To start a thread on nutty neighbours?

[littlefrenchonion]

Neighbour (early 50's, healthy, but very odd with her own strange opinions on everything) just popped her head over the fence to inform me that her granddaughter recently caught Ebola from eating one of her pet chicken's eggs. Really? Are you sure? Not salmonella? Nope, actual EBOLA, as in the haemorrhagic disease currently sweeping parts of West Africa. But it's ok, as her granddaughter is a Coeliac and is therefore more likely to catch EBOLA than me. She looked it up on the internet and thinks it may be the first case of a chicken spreading Ebola, as she couldn't find any information. But I should probably avoid eating eggs to be on the safe side (I'm pregnant). Right.

In the same conversation, I have also been told off for 'marching' down my garden too fast, don't I know it will give me pre-eclampsia?

In the past we've been accused of closing our windows 'rudely', and that my Facebook account has been hacked because she searched my name and it came up with someone else with my name but it wasn't me!

Anyone else have any crazy/daft/weird neighbours and some good stories to tell?

When I was in my 20s living in a rented flat, I got the sense my ndn was watching me. He'd pop out the front or back whenever I was out there & chat - I thought he prob fancied me so kept it short & sweet but perfectly friendly. Then one day, I was going out on a date & he kind of leered at me over the front wall & said 'Ooh, you've got a big split up the back of your skirt!' I plucked up the courage to say, 'Look, this has got to stop, it's making me feel uncomfortable' & went off. That night when I got back, he'd put newspaper over all the windows. It stayed there till I moved out & I never saw him again.

My next rented place used to be housing for nurses at the local hospital & there were a couple of elderly retired nurses still living there. One prob had dementia & she used to wander up & down the communal gardens at night in her white nightie with her white hair down her back sort of looming at people coming home late. It was quite secluded & you had to go through the garden to get to the flats so it could be... disconcerting.

our neighbours thought it was their divine right to park on our driveway due to it being right outside their living room window(bizarre developer layout plans)

they were really angry when we showed them the boundary on our deeds and have completely blanked us since, even if we walk within a few feet of them they turn their backs how rude of us to want to park on our own bought and mortgaged property!

i wish our broadband had been up and running at the time, it would have made a cracking live parking thread. it had it all; late night sneaky parking with dh popping round to make them move straight away; legal threats from them; shouting from them, etc.