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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To start a thread on nutty neighbours?

102 replies

littlefrenchonion · 16/04/2015 22:15

Neighbour (early 50's, healthy, but very odd with her own strange opinions on everything) just popped her head over the fence to inform me that her granddaughter recently caught Ebola from eating one of her pet chicken's eggs. Really? Are you sure? Not salmonella? Nope, actual EBOLA, as in the haemorrhagic disease currently sweeping parts of West Africa. But it's ok, as her granddaughter is a Coeliac and is therefore more likely to catch EBOLA than me. She looked it up on the internet and thinks it may be the first case of a chicken spreading Ebola, as she couldn't find any information. But I should probably avoid eating eggs to be on the safe side (I'm pregnant). Right.

In the same conversation, I have also been told off for 'marching' down my garden too fast, don't I know it will give me pre-eclampsia?

In the past we've been accused of closing our windows 'rudely', and that my Facebook account has been hacked because she searched my name and it came up with someone else with my name but it wasn't me!

Anyone else have any crazy/daft/weird neighbours and some good stories to tell?

OP posts:
WorraLiberty · 16/04/2015 23:08

And if that wasn't bad enough, I sent them a Christmas card addressed to 'Ronnie', and family.

I got one back from 'Reggie' and family Blush

MyArksNotReady · 16/04/2015 23:08

I thought it was a ball named Wilson in Cast away.

Who is Winston?

Dad hecwear the overall over a blue and white stripey top, with a berriet and onions round his neck?

springsprang · 16/04/2015 23:10

WILSON!

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 16/04/2015 23:11

Ah, yes. Wilson. Grin

I have only seen it once...

KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 16/04/2015 23:12

Poor Tom lying on his raft as his only friend surfed away...

Original poster
littlefrenchonion · 16/04/2015 23:20

Joffrey wasn't there a dog in Lost called Winston?

Worra, I keep mixing up the names of two of my other neighbours I have too many neighbours, I've taken to calling them both David (one of them definitely is!). At least I'll get one right...

OP posts:
KingJoffreyFanciesDarylDixon · 16/04/2015 23:22

The neighbour with the cars and the bodies is called Garth.

Whenever I see him my little brain is like:

Party on, Wayne! Party on, Garth!!

BreconBeBuggered · 16/04/2015 23:22

Our NDN came storming round to complain that DH had cut down our half of the hedge between our gardens to the same height as his. He said it was our fault that people could now see into his garden Confused

Original poster
littlefrenchonion · 16/04/2015 23:29

Hedges seem to be a particular fascination to the strange neighbour type.

Ebola chicken neighbour once came hammering on our front door last summer because the neighbour on her other side had cut the one they share wonky! Insisted came into her garden and look at it RIGHT NOW which I did. All I could say was 'urm, I guess it'll grow back?!' What did she want me to do?!?!

OP posts:
McFox · 16/04/2015 23:32

When we moved into our building the first visit we got was from the old woman across the landing demanding £100 to plant a commemorative tree in the garden for someone who used to live in the building and died before we moved in. She was fuming when we said no and bad mouthed us to other neighbours for the next 3 years until she moved out!

Qwebec · 17/04/2015 00:24

This thread has my crying with laughter. Worra and her neigbour's pants that smell amazing (who boils overalls weekly?) and cast away that keeps going on and on!

Never had a nutty neighbour, but I had one who got inspired when an other one did a karaoke night in his garden once. That summer every week she would sing a song completely drunk all widows open.

TowerRavenSeven · 17/04/2015 02:33

An old neighbour of mine tried to strangle me when I politely told her that her son (primary) was exposing himself.

IggyStrop · 17/04/2015 02:45

Three months ago my next door neighbour asked me if I was pregnant. I said no, and she shrank under my angry glare.

Last week SHE ASKED ME AGAIN. She is totally lucid and there is nothing wrong with her faculties - other than a crashing lack of tact.

IggyStrop · 17/04/2015 02:48

"An old neighbour of mine tried to strangle me when I politely told her that her son (primary) was exposing himself."

Well! That IS nutty. Actually, it crosses the border of nutty and moves into "psychotic".

MagelanicClouds · 17/04/2015 07:45

We have Animal Lady in our street. Her back garden is so jammed with hutches there's no room for anything else. The lady that lives right next door to her says the smell in summer is truly vile.
She also told me that Animal Lady had run out of room in the back to bury dead animals so that's why a large paving slab with a vase on it had appeared out the front.
Confused
But then the lady that told me is someone who likes to know every detail of everyone's business and assumes you want to hear all about all her heath issues. In detail.
Blush

TheReluctantCountess · 17/04/2015 07:54

We used to have an awful neighbour, and it drove my do to a breakdown. We have a lovely neighbour now who we barely talk to and all is well.

Pinot4me · 17/04/2015 08:05

We moved into a corner plot house and planted lots of little trees around the border to make it more private so that we could extend the garden. We kept waking up to find the trees ripped put and dumped in the road...after a few weeks of this we set up a camera and saw our 'seemingly friendly' but obviously crazy ndn ripping them out. We had assumed it was kids so we're a bit shocked. I went round to see her (crazy lady) and she said we were 'greedy' because we had more than enough land and shouldn't need to extend our garden (on our land, that we'd just bought) it was a nightmare!! Barking mad!

sidneypie · 17/04/2015 08:20

Be thankful you don't live near my MIL. She has complained to the landlord about her new neighbours as they sit in their garden in the evening 'with their hoodies up'. When I pointed out it was March and a bit chilly in the evenings she said 'and they look dirty'. Her other neighbours have 'too many hanging baskets' !!

mrsfuzzy · 17/04/2015 08:22

love this thread !

vvviola · 17/04/2015 08:30

Neighbour1 constantly complains to me that lovely Neighbour2 hangs out their washing at the side of the house instead of the back garden. Apparently "the neighbours don't like it".

Unfortunately Neighbour1 is my mother so I can't get away from it!

MidniteScribbler · 17/04/2015 08:40

Ex-neighbour got herself a donkey (how does one just go and get a donkey?), then would get drunk and go outside and start braying to it and trying to get it to talk to her.

I also used to come home to find her naked in my pool.

mrsfuzzy · 17/04/2015 08:43

midnite.. laughing so much picturing this, nearly wetting myself, quick pass the tena lady pads someone !

Kbear · 17/04/2015 08:49

My NDN knocked one Christmas Eve evening and told me to stop flushing nappies down the toilet because it's blocking the drains and flooding his garden. My kids were 8 and 6 at the time. I wished him Merry Christmas and drain unblocking and shut the door.

This was after he pissed us off after his van was broken into, by telling us that nothing like that had happened in 30 years.....until we moved in.....

ToastMakesMeHappy · 17/04/2015 09:04

Old ndn used to get drunk and have relations with some poor chap.. She would be so loud that dh once heard her from the car park 4 house down the road! 'Twas awful as her bedroom was next to ours in a terraced house..

Greenrememberedhills · 17/04/2015 09:06

My neighbours were odd in my last house.

Next door was lovely. The other side were very old and she was a bit Hyancinth Bucket. She would sit on a cushion in her bedroom windowsill waiting for cars going to town to park, and then screech at them. Or remind them she knew their boss and would complain. Small town, so she did, too. Her husband phoned me up because our black bin was full so one of the kids put the black bag next to it, not in it. He was raving with temper, and told me it "wasn't that kind of street".

A woman a few doors down came to complain about noise in the garden one summer evening after I had a birthday dinner. I denied having any music in the garden and said she had mistaken me for the lad next door (lovely neighbours son) whose parents were away. She demanded I went with her to help her complain to him, and wasn't delight when I refused.

Many years ago when I was twenty-ish, I lived in a fairly run down area. One neighbour actually killed their baby, tragically, right next door, and the people on the other size grew miles of cannabis. I opened the curtains one morning to find police all over the garden.