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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think guests do not need to use our en-suite as well as the family bathroom?

103 replies

MidnightSun77 · 15/04/2015 18:00

It really irritates me when guests walk through our bedroom to use our en-suite 'because someone else is in the other bathroom' or because it has a better shower. They don't do it when we're in bed but I prefer to keep our bedroom and en-suite out of bounds even in daytime.

The family bathroom is right next to guest-room, although the shower over bath is set low on wall, so if they want to shower they have to crouch or sit in the bath (walls are part-tiled). However I've used it myself many times and its not difficult to use. DH thinks we should also offer guests use of walk-in shower in en-suite as well, but unless they have mobility problems I don't see why they can't use family bathroom! In my experience once they use en-suite shower they keep popping in and out to use loo/brush their teeth/get changed etc, which I find intrusive.

AIBU to not offer en-suite, and to politely ask them to use other bathroom?

OP posts:
mamapants · 15/04/2015 18:02

Of course they shouldn't use your en suite.
But your shower does sound annoying. You should get a hook for it on the wall.

Fairylea · 15/04/2015 18:02

I wouldn't even tell people you have another bathroom. Just tell them about the family one.

Flossyfloof · 15/04/2015 18:03

"...and thus is your bathroom..." .the end.

Flossyfloof · 15/04/2015 18:04

This!

Leeds2 · 15/04/2015 18:04

I think I would get a lock for your bedroom door if this is happening frequently! I have never known anyone do that, and wouldn't like it.

CaTsMaMmA · 15/04/2015 18:04

upgrade the tiling in there ya cheapskate ..who wants to crouch and give themselves a cricked back, neck, arsebone, swilling off the day's filth??

YABU!

CatWomantotheRescue · 15/04/2015 18:06

Yes, fix the shower in the family bathroom and once you've done that you won't BU. No adult wants to crouch/sit to take a shower. My back would hurt for the rest of the day if I had to do that.

sabrina00 · 15/04/2015 18:06

So you don't want anyone to use your en-suite if someone else is tying up the family bathroom? Bit selfish, no? What are they supposed to do? Cross their legs? Piss themselves?

Also, your shower sounds shit.

sabrina00 · 15/04/2015 18:08

You don't see why they can't use the family bathroom?

Because it's shit!!

Very simple. Provide decent accommodations to your guests or let them use the proper bloody shower in your ensuite. Christ, how fucking selfish, keeping the best stuff for yourself and giving your guests the crap room.

HappinessHappening · 15/04/2015 18:10

YANBU

the ensuite is yours and it's not ok for people to just assume they can use it, I hate anyone being in my bedroom. If you didn't have it they'd manage with the normal bathroom

FishWithABicycle · 15/04/2015 18:11

YANBU to not want guests using your en suite. Therefore YABvvvvvU to have such a crappy shower in your family bathroom. Sort it out so they can have a proper shower standing up. Until that's done, either don't have any guests or allow them to use your en suite. Crouching half-shower is not acceptable and not hospitable.

Original poster
MidnightSun77 · 15/04/2015 18:12

We can't change the tiling in shower as it's a rental property. It has a hook on wall, you just can't stand up under it as it's too low down. TBH I don't see why they can't have a bath instead and just use the shower to rinse off afterwards.

Many of my friends' houses have only one bathroom (shared between everyone) but we manage fine when we stay with them.

OP posts:
GlitzAndGigglesx · 15/04/2015 18:13

Bloody peasants!

zukiecat · 15/04/2015 18:13

Your shower sounds great to me!

I hate showers and on the very, very rare occasions that I do have one I always sit down (shower is over the bath)

I don't think you are being unreasonable in wanting to keep your en-suite private though,unless someone really needed to use it in an emergency.

OwlinaTree · 15/04/2015 18:15

I'd either let people use the shower in en suite or upgrade the family bathroom for a decent shower experience.

OnlyLovers · 15/04/2015 18:15

So can you take the shower head off the wall and hold it in your hand? If so then maybe get a Japanese-style stool and bucket so people can have a sit-down shower rather than crouching.

I wouldn't even mention the en suite until or unless a situation came up where someone was in the other bathroom and a guest badly needed the loo.

londonrach · 15/04/2015 18:16

Tbh if there is no shower in the bathroom and you know theres one in the en suite id ask to use it. Yabu. I rent as well and have en suite and bathroom. My guests use both as dont see the problem.

Salmotrutta · 15/04/2015 18:17

Oh I see sabrina has popped up again... Hmm

OP - that would bug me too!

Your shower doesn't sound that bad and certainly adequate for a decent sluice down.

Pipbin · 15/04/2015 18:17

What is it with all the people on MN who seem to have people staying with them that they struggle to talk to?
If someone is staying in my house then I know them well enough to say something like this or not care if they walk through my bedroom.

So if your guest had said 'someone else is in the bathroom and I really need a wee, can I use the en suite', would you honestly have said no and made them wait.

OwlinaTree · 15/04/2015 18:21

Sorry, x post, didn't see it's a rental. Which shower do you honestly prefer? How long is it going to take for a whole family of visitors to bath v shower? You will never get out anywhere quickly!

expatinscotland · 15/04/2015 18:22

'It has a hook on wall, you just can't stand up under it as it's too low down. TBH I don't see why they can't have a bath instead and just use the shower to rinse off afterwards.'

That sounds shit. A lot of people hate baths for bathing, too, and much prefer a shower.

TelephoneIgnoringMachine · 15/04/2015 18:24

Not all mobility problems are particularly obvious. Would you rather quiz everyone about their health?

WeAllHaveWings · 15/04/2015 18:25

I would not begrude a guest in my home the use of a proper shower, its something I can easily do to make my guest more comfortable.

Agree with Pipbin, why do so many people have guests they don't seem to like Confused.

AdoraBell · 15/04/2015 18:27

Having lived temporarily with someone whose only bathroom had the kind of shower arrangement your family bathroom has I can fully understand why people would want use your en-suite if they stay for more than a day.

How long do your guests usually stay?

YANBU to want privacy and your own bathroom, but I would rather stay else where than shower the way I had to. So I agree, if you want to maintain your en-suite as "your" bathroom then you should sort the family bathroom to make it easier and nicer to use.

mamapants · 15/04/2015 18:28

Well if you can't do anything about the shower then I would offer use of my shower.
I wouldn't want people just coming and going as they pleased as I'd want to make ssure it was neat etc

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