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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask why so many "vegetarians" eat fish?

267 replies

Housewife2010 · 14/04/2015 08:06

I think I may now describe myself as a vegetarian who eats meat! I don't eat any shellfish or much fish so surely it all evens out!

OP posts:
SuburbanRhonda · 14/04/2015 09:11

suburbanrhonda- no, it is a first world problem because that's exactly what it is. Have you lived in a developing country?

Grin
sebsmummy1 · 14/04/2015 09:13

Alternatively vegetarians could clarify their stance by saying 'I'm vegetarian, I don't eat meat or fish, thank you'. Just an extra second if dialogue would stop you being offered something that offends.

This thread makes me realise I've been on this site too long as I remember the last bun fight over this particular issue. No one won by the way.

fulltothebrim · 14/04/2015 09:16

It's up to the vegetarians/vegans to get their own house in order, not us omnivores catering for them.

SuburbanRhonda · 14/04/2015 09:16

Problem is with that explanation, seb, is that you could still be offered something containing gelatine, rennet or lard (there is a "Tesco Finest" cheese which contains lard Shock)

I can't believe it can really be that difficult for someone to ensure a dish contains no animal ingredients.

SuburbanRhonda · 14/04/2015 09:17

I said they'd be along soon, and here you are, right on cue, full.

sebsmummy1 · 14/04/2015 09:19

Rhonda we argued about this in 2014 lol. Life really is too short to complete this circle with you again Grin

I wave my white flag and hope you have many more happy years eating vegetables currently doing weight watchers and my diet consists of about 90% of the healthy, colourful bastards so I may as well join you

fulltothebrim · 14/04/2015 09:20

suburban- so you have lived in a developing country?

AlternativeTentacles · 14/04/2015 09:24

It's up to the vegetarians/vegans to get their own house in order

My own house is in order thanks. It's not my fault if you don't understand the basics.

YouBetterWerk · 14/04/2015 09:24

YANBU OP.
My OH is a full on, long standing, no fish/fat/gelatine vegetarian.
The amount of times he's been served prawns/mussels etc is pretty countless tbh.

elementofsurprise · 14/04/2015 09:26

lougle Off the top of my head, and it probably won't stand up to scrutiny, but my personal ethical grounds are based on whether something is necessary or has a purpose. I am pescatarian. I was veggie for 10 years then recently started eating fish again for health reasons. So there's a reason to eat it. By the same token, I drink soya milk, because to me it makes no difference, so I might as well have the non-animal product. Mind you, that means the 'purpose' of eating cheese is that it's lovely, so perhaps I'm phrasing this all wrong!

For the record, I describe myself as "pescatarian" and follow it up with "that's like a veggie who eats fish" if I get blank looks. I do try to impress the difference on people because it winds me up when people describe themselves as "veggie" but eat gelatin - or even chicken!! (gelatin they might not have realised, at least.) People then feel the need to question so I explain I was veggie for years but now eat fish for health reasons.

The most annoying thing I find in the whole veggie/other area is loudspoken meat-eaters who cannot imagine a meal, or even a recipe, without meat in. Show these same people a buffet and they will happily scoff all the delicious veggie food, leaving the veggies with nothing.

KahloSherman · 14/04/2015 09:28

I use to be a vegetarian, then started eating fish for health reasons. Now, if someone needs to know my dietary requirements I tend to say, 'I'm a vegetarian but I eat fish' or 'I am a fish'n'chippocrite' simply because pescatarian is what DH refers to as a ten-dollar word that makes people go Hmm People in the UK - for the most part -understand vegetarianism and that it doesn't mean you will eat vegetable soup with beef stock in it (looking at you, France) or salad with ham in it (looking at you, Netherlands) so telling people I'm a vegetarian who makes an exception for fish gets it straight in people's minds.

Plus pescatarian sounds like Pastafarian and whilst I greatly admire members of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, I am not one of them Grin

fulltothebrim · 14/04/2015 09:32

alternatives- oh I completely understand the basics it's just that there are so many "vegetarians" who have high principles that are weakly adhered to.

Never quite sure I understand ethical vegatarians who are still happy to drink milk and therefore supporting the veal industry though...............

IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou · 14/04/2015 09:33

I'm afraid that if I spent my time worrying about what special dietary needs my friends & colleagues had my steak'd go cold.

Call yourselves what you like, but if you come to dinner round mine & don't tell me what you can't/won't eat then don't be upset with what you're given.

The onus is on you to tell me, not for me to work out whether the salt was scraped from Porpoise Armpits or battery reared in a mine...

AlternativeTentacles · 14/04/2015 09:37

oh I completely understand the basics it's just that there are so many "vegetarians" who have high principles that are weakly adhered to.

No. What you have there are people that are NOT vegetarians. That is the point.

toptomatoes · 14/04/2015 09:38

I was vegetarian but now eat fish but only a few types so it is much easier to say I am vegetarian if asked for dietary requirements as I happy to eat anything vegetarian rather than get into a big list of dietary requirements. I wouldn't eat fish on that occasion. Also, if you describe yourself as pescetarian you get a raised eyebrow and an interrogation very often rather than just getting to eat some food.

judydoes · 14/04/2015 09:39

This stuff DOES affect other people's lives . It causes ambiguity and confusion. Words are there to apply meaning.

When I pick the 'vegetarian option' at a set meal and I am presented with the salmon-that's a downright affect of people becoming confused about what 'vegetarian' means.

I don't see why people feel the need to apply non-applicable labels to themselves. Why not just say 'I don't eat much meat' or 'I don't like much meat, I eat fish though'. ..

fulltothebrim · 14/04/2015 09:40

IKnowIAmButWhatAreYou

Exactly. I always offer non meat options when entertaining ( I really enjoy non- meat foods), but this is what I mean about it all being a first world problem.

I wouldn't dream of suggesting to a host to leave onions out of a dish or make sure my potatoes don't touch my peas.

Unless it is for medical reasons I don't really have a great deal of respect for fads like this.

fulltothebrim · 14/04/2015 09:42

No. What you have there are people that are NOT vegetarians. That is the point.*

But they say they are- it's not up to me to work out the fine details- it's not me that is the fussy eater. As I say it's up to you guys to sort yourselves out.

ArcheryAnnie · 14/04/2015 09:42

My niece is vegan, and won't eat dairy- unless it is Ben & Jerry's Ice cream. Or gelatin- unless it is anything pudding related.

She's not a vegan. She might be fairly described as "someone who eats a mostly vegan diet", but she's not a vegan. She's not even a vegetarian.

I have a "principled" vegetarian friend who is happy to eat meat when she is tipsy.

She's not a vegetarian.

It's a first world problem.

What on earth do you mean by this?

SylvaniansAtEase · 14/04/2015 09:46

a. because it's easier and 'safer' to say that than to describe yourself as a pescetarian when a lot of people don't understand that;

b. because a small but irritating minority use the word 'vegetarian' to describe the fact that they don't eat certain meats or meat products. They aren't vegetarian, however. But in any normal 'organising the meal' situation, any issues could be cleared up in a couple of sentences.

I too don't understand why people get so worked up about vegetarianism. I can only suppose it's because a certain kind of meat eater feels judged in some way. There's always an undertone of 'us sensible no-nonsense meat eaters v you faddy silly illogical types'. Very daft.

AlternativeTentacles · 14/04/2015 09:50

But they say they are- it's not up to me to work out the fine details- it's not me that is the fussy eater. As I say it's up to you guys to sort yourselves out.

Us guys [people who are vegetarian] are sorted out. It's your niece and friend/s that seem confused by the matter. Why are you scared of telling them that they are not vegetarians at all? Neither of them...

fatlazymummy · 14/04/2015 09:51

If I'm talking about my diet on a forum I usually describe it as vegetarian. That's because it mostly is though I do eat fish occassionally. If I'm in a restaurant I usually choose the vegetarian option. I don't generally eat in other people's houses anymore, other than close family so that problem doesn't really arise.
I am vegetarian/pescatarian for taste reasons not ethical, so I make my own rules up. Just as an example ,I would eat parmesan cheese or jelly sweets, but I won't eat meat gravy or anything cooked in lard. I don't like pretend meat products (such as quorn).
Obviously people aren't interested in the minor details of my diet in everyday life, so I usually just say I'm vegetarian so they get the general idea.

MTWTFSS · 14/04/2015 09:53

I keep a kosher diet. In a kosher diet you can only eat certain fish/meat.

When I'm out I say I'm vegetarian to make it easier as I can eat everything vege whereas if I said I could eat fish I'd then have to list all the fish I can/can't eat.

TelephoneIgnoringMachine · 14/04/2015 09:54

I'm mostly vegetarian. I tell people I'm mostly vegetarian. If they want more info, they generally ask.

Yambabe · 14/04/2015 09:54

My sister was a vegetarian for many years, for ethical reasons.

I got used to describing her as such, and if I cooked for her I would check ingredients etc.

When she had her DD she decided to add fish to her diet for health reasons for both her and her DD, that was 15 years ago now! I still tend to refer to her as veggie, and still tend to offer food with no flesh at all if she comes here to eat. Not sure if it''s just force of habit?

I may need to have a word with myself.........