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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that 'People You May Know' function could ruin Facebook.

195 replies

takemeuptheeiffeltower · 13/04/2015 17:02

We all like Facebook because it helps us keep in touch with people, especially if they live far away,.
But if we're honest, whilst we are keeping in touch most of us also like to have an annonymous nose around to see who's doing what! Wink It's part of the fun.
Anyway, it's human nature to be inquisitive nosey
But if people can see that you have searched for them Shock and vice versa, then I can see people leaving FB in droves.

Have FB gone too far this time?

OP posts:
takemeuptheeifeltower · 16/04/2015 11:27

privacy policy is not remotely ambiguous, nobody bothers to actually read it. FB is free to use, you act as if they owe you something for using it.
You people dont get it, youre not the customer, youre the product!

madreloco
Sure you're not an employee? mark's no. 1 fan Grin
We may sound paranoid, but you are coming across a bit over-zealous slightly obsessive and overly-protective in your defending of FB.

Seems a bit strange s'all.

takemeuptheeifeltower · 16/04/2015 11:31

Bottom line is, paranoid or not, most people don't like the People You May Know function and if they want to keep people using FB, then it would make good sense to either modify it so it's less creepilyintrusive, or

Scrap that particular feature altogether.

RuthAaaghhh · 16/04/2015 11:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FriendlyLadybird · 16/04/2015 11:45

DH (not on facebook) has a real life stalker who we know has stalked me on facebook. She also tried to connect with me on linkedin (I deleted). She's never turned up on my 'people you may know' list.

On the other hand, I was most surprised to see a very-ex colleague (think 20 years) on the list the other day. I'm pretty sure she doesn't know my married name and we don't have any mutual facebook friends, although I am friends with a couple of mutual ex-colleagues.

RuthAaaghhh · 16/04/2015 12:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MegTeg · 16/04/2015 12:35

I've had to delete my facebook because of the people you may know feature. If they got rid of it I would re-activate my account, but I won't be able to do it while that feature exists.

takemeuptheeifeltower · 16/04/2015 13:46

It's good that we are able to discuss it. Just think, If we lived in a police state, any normal, civilized grown-up discussion would be squashed immediately and people would possibly even be banned.
We are lucky we are not in that type of environment.
if I don't come back on you know what's happened Wink

madreloco · 16/04/2015 13:52

I've had to delete my facebook because of the people you may know feature. If they got rid of it I would re-activate my account, but I won't be able to do it while that feature exists.

This feature does nothing to you and can't affect you in any way unless you actually click on the links to add the people. You've deactivated it for your own reasons.

takemeuptheeifeltower · 16/04/2015 13:55

But the feature makes her uncomfortable about using Facebook.

Nobody is criticizing Facebook - Facebook is great. It's just ONE feature that's the problem..

madreloco · 16/04/2015 14:00

But for the wrong reasons, thats the point.

I find it funny that people ignore all the simpler, obvious answers, in favour of a discredited rumour that makes little sense but has the allure of sinister goings on. FB doesn't need to or want to suggest to you people that you think are stalking you (look at the comments here, that would be counter productive, and they want to keep you as a product asset, not have you leave) when there is so much easy to find info about you already.

You're worried about the rumour of a zebra when you should be looking at the herd of horses about the run you over!

SoleSource · 16/04/2015 15:33

Just block people you feel uncomfortable about.

OttiliaVonBCup · 16/04/2015 15:39

One of my randoms just became friends with one of my friends.

They are closing in on me ...Grin

Seriously. I don't really care, just having some fun.
Besides, FB is not compulsory.

HydrochloricTulip · 16/04/2015 20:30

I don't get how it works out who you may know. I recently had a suggestion of a woman who I was at primary school with. We have no friends in common, she lives about 500 miles away from me and I haven't looked her up, she can't have looked me up as my name has changed and I haven't looked at any FB pages connected to my primary school.

madreloco · 16/04/2015 21:16

at some point you both logged that you went to the same school. doesnt have to be on fb, maybe ten years ago you joined friends reunited or similar. There are lots and lots of different but quite simple ways to work out who you might know.

FryOneFatManic · 16/04/2015 22:25

People who I've had no connection with have popped up on the "people you may know" bit. I've just had a look. And one of them is a former colleague of DP's. DP is not on FB, and doesn't do any other social media, and I have absolutely no reason to go searching for ex-colleagues.

HydrochloricTulip · 16/04/2015 22:32

I haven't added my schools to fb and I've not joined friends United either.

noblegiraffe · 17/04/2015 07:07

Facebook has tried to guess which school I went to based on the schools my friends have added. I haven't completed my profile but when I go there it has questions like 'where do you work?' and a list of places my friends work to select.
It probably used that.

HydrochloricTulip · 17/04/2015 07:12

But none of my FB 'friends' live in the town I went to school in, they all live about 200 miles away from where I went to school so how could it guess based on that? I've got a very small number of FB 'friends' (

madreloco · 17/04/2015 19:37

I haven't added my schools to fb and I've not joined friends United either.

Doesn't matter. You're thinking too small...at some point you have logged something, somewhere, that links you to that person. Could be anything, anywhere, any time. It's out there, because the scrapers found it.

Original poster
takemeuptheeiffeltower · 18/04/2015 01:32

Facebook is getting boring now.

Does it really matter what is the final nail in the coffin? Smile

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