To wonder why so many people on trains become selfish.

[Sickoffrozen]

I went to London on Tuesday this week on business and the train was extremely full with some people standing.

Why do people think it's acceptable to sit in one seat and put their bags on the one next to them in the obvious hope that no one will ask them to move it? There were also some kids sprawled out on two seats, asleep.

The train manager twice made announcements to ask for people to move bags from seats yet some people still didn't. There was plenty of room in the overhead storage so no real excuses.

Why is having someone sat next to you so bad?

Are these people as selfish in all aspects of their life do you think?

I'd put my bag on the seat if the train is empty, but as soon as it started filling up I'd move it.

I'm not sure refusing to move bags or pretending not to notice people standing is quite as rife as people seem to believe - having used commuter services into London and the tube for over 15 years, I've only ever once seen someone get arsey about moving a bag.

If a bag was on a seat I wanted, I would (and have) ask for it to be moved. It's not that big a deal, IMO.

I put my bag on the seat if there is loads of space. I move it as soon as I realise that it is plausible someone will need the seat (before big stations, anyone wandering slowly up the aisle, etc).

However, I am Caspian's ideal travel companion - a small, non-threatening girl with a book. This means often, women elect to take the seat next to me, even when there are loads of others free (I suspect because it's protecting them against potentially more awful companions along the journey). When this happens, I may not have moved my bag from the seat as I'm genuinely expecting them to fill up the free doubles first. In this case, someone may need to prompt me (and, of course, I immediately move the bag).

So please don't do this:

I either just sit on the bags

I've had a rather large lady deliberately sit on my laptop before, just to make a point. Not cool and really fucking rude. She wants to sit next to me, fine. But she could have realised that perhaps I wasn't expecting anyone to want to sit next to me, given the sheer amount of seats available in their own quiet spots.

I was on a train recently and there were people sat on the floor, so the food and drinks trolley could not get through.

I went to get a sandwich and pointed out that there were empty seats, well seat available but people had their bags on them. I told them it would be a cold day in hell before I sat on the floor in those circumstances.

They made and announcement that the guard would be along shortly and any bags on seats would have to pay for a ticket. Funnily enough, the trolley made it through shortly after.

how funny mammatj
i often feel like asking, Does your bag have a ticket? but never do, if people dont move their bags I just ask

it is the same on buses.
worst offenders are those, probably already mentioned, who put their bags in the window seat.
i hate feet on seats
i travel to work by bus, me and college students. bags and feet all over the seats. #desperateforacar

If a train / bus only has a few easily accessible spaces, I'll always go for the awkward one with the bag on / next to an aisle-hogger / in the middle of a set of 6. It feels like the right thing to do.

'why do you think it's 'your' seat to give or not give as it pleases you?'

I don't think of it as 'my' seat to allocate, but I do think it's fine to try and influence who sits next to you. To encourage someone to sit I make eye contact, smile and move my bag. If I don't want them next to me I look busy or stare coldly past them, trying to look unfriendly and
unapproachable. Sometimes I put my coat on spare seat instead of bag, fold the table down and put water bottle or coffee cup there to make it look taken. If someone asks me to move my things I always do so immediately but I prefer not to share my space if I don't have to. It's surprising how many people sit next to others when there are lots of free seats.

I notice lots of people doing same on trains and don't see a problem with it. I often ask people to move bags so I can sit. What does irritate me is when people have massive 90L rucksacks or suitcases on seats, since they can't move these even if asked.

Trains are overrun with annoying, inconsiderate people who encroach your personal space. Sitting next to a chatterbox for 3 hours is awful. So is sitting next to a noisy wriggly child. Recently I ended up next to a mum with toddler on her lap for a 2.5 hour journey. He constantly kicked me, shouted and shrieked in my ear, smeared chocolate all over himself and undid the zip of my handbag, pulling out my lipstick and phone before we noticed!

I'll probably get flamed for this, but I really don't see the point of being needlessly bolshy about this kind of thing. If there is a bag on the seat, just ask politely for it to be moved so you can sit down. Smart-arse questions about whether or not the bag has a ticket, making a point of sitting on the bag or just being stroppy about asking invites a rude response or refusal. Yes, people shouldn't put their bags on the seat if it's busy but they may have been on the train since it was empty, simply not noticed it filling up and just require a polite question.

No wonder everyone's so bloody rude to each other all the time when so many people's default approach is confrontational.

I sit on the outside of two seats as I'm large but well used sitting on one cheek so don't impinge on the person on the inside. If I sit on the inside it means the other person is forced to "hang one off" which is hardly comfortable. I don't do it to prevent people from sitting on the inside - on a commuter train that ain't gonna happen.

I admit I do it if the train is half empty but when it gets full I move them. Why do I do it? Because there are a lot of people out there with no sense of personal space, or apparently no sense of smell.

What really bugs me is the people that sit in reserved seats and they get all arsey with you when you ask them to move. Same in the cinema.

A couple of weeks go the only free seat on the bus was taken by the bag of a girl who was staring out of the window with headphones on. I muttered "excuse me" a few times, then said it out quit loud, then actualy waved my hand in front of her face and eventually tapped her lightly on the arm. She then moved her bag to the gap between the seats and gave me a death stare. Whatever, princess. If someone sitting next to you bothers you so much, walk or drive your car.

even worse is mums sitting in reserved seats and refusing to remove non paying infants/babies from the seat next to them when it is clearly reserved. You want the free kid ticket? sorry no seat then.

I was on a lateish train home just before Christmas. So had had a glass of wine or five. The bloke in front was sprawled out with a bag next to him. Another bloke came on and asked if he could sit in the seat where his bag was. Sprawled bloke went "no, sit somewhere else". So fecking rude. I had a long conversation with another bloke next to me about how many in front was the rudest man ever. Rudest man ever got up an moved carriages eventually to get away from the drunk woman behind him bitching about his rudeness

PickledSarnie

Sarnie, that's it, I am taking you on every train journey I ever go on from now on!

I think you should hire yourself out!!

I sit on the outside seat if I'm on the fast train coming home, as my stop is the first stop. I have a heavy bag which I put on the overhead rack. If I'm on an inside seat, being a bit of a short arse, the chances of me pulling it off and catching someone's head with it are much increased. Is that a good enough reason for you?

I also don't understand the angst about asking someone to move bags, coats etc. I just ask politely and I have never had a problem. I even had the nerve common sense to politely ask a mum with a baby sat on her lap if I could sit down where she had placed the baby's bag. The train was heaving, I was shattered, and I was quite willing to put the bag on the overhead rack for her.

No one is entitled to their "space" on a packed commuter train.

You'll need to feed me wine first snotty, without my magic wine head on I would have just sat there giving him silent evils to the back of his oblivious, very rude head. And possibly tutted quietly.

But who on earth are you to decide, Caspian, who looks like 'a good train companion', or that you will only condescend to have 'a quiet-looking presentable female without dogs or children' sitting next to you?

It's so breathtakingly arrogant.

Why are people so obsessed with sitting down? Unless pregnant or have physical problems, just get over it! You're more than likely going to be sat at your desk all day ffs! Standing burns more calories and is better for you than constantly sitting on your lardy bum.

I know, Mummy; the fighting over seats on the tube and train is mystifying.

Are you serious mummyluce?! You do realise that some train journeys are hours long don't you? Couple of stops other tube, fair enough. 4 hours to York, totally different matter.

I like to sit down because my train journey is about an hour (with no delays - hah!) and after a day at work and a decent walk to the station I feel like I need a seat. Also I can read my book better when sitting.

mummy I shan't be "getting over it" any time soon.

I just like to sit down and my ass is un-lardy, thankyouverymuch

Mummyluce - by the time I am on my way home, I shall have been up since 5.30am and have been on my feet for most of the day. I will happily give up a seat for someone more deserving than me. However, I won't stand when there are seats available, but someone wants to protect their personal space.

Some really passive aggressive people on MN ! Just ask them to move the bags ffs !!! why get so emotional about such trivial things that don't matter! Some of you really do need to get over yourselves.

It was a Glasgow to London train mummy to be fair! 5 hr journey. That's a fairly long time to stand up!