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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To buy tracking devices for my kids?

59 replies

Lesausage · 07/04/2015 21:43

I lost my first son over 13 yrs ago and I have two dc now 3 and 4. I'm terrified that anything can happen to them and they are always in mine or dh care/sight etc but they start going to nursery every day for 3 hours soon and I want to buy these

It would give me piece of mind and dh agrees a bit if only to make me less on a loon but I can't help thinking it's a bit OTT, has anyone ever used them?

Please be gentle

OP posts:

Azquilith · 07/04/2015 21:45

I would totally do this and actually looked into it. However, I don't think the technology is there yet. Unless the child has a smartphone on them, trackers are quite bulky and batteries only seem to last for a day at most. I wanted some kind of dot I could put in a shoe and could track forever!

Clobbered · 07/04/2015 21:46

If it would make you feel better, then do it. So what if it's OTT - no-one else's business, surely?
Sorry for the loss of your older son.

MrsFlannel · 07/04/2015 21:46

Yanbu. I know some people scoff at such things but there's no harm in having them if they make you feel better.

So sorry you lost your first son.

PiperIsTerrysChoclateOrange · 07/04/2015 21:52

These are a fantastic idea for when your out in busy places, but in a nursery where you know where they are does sound Ott.

JsOtherHalf · 07/04/2015 21:52

This might be a better option? It works in the UK too.

childtrack247.com

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2015 21:53

I don't really know how to word this question OP for fear of sounding insensitive but as you're talking about tracking devices...

When You say you lost your first son, do you mean you lost him as in you couldn't find him or as in he passed away?

If it's the latter, I'm not sure how tracking devices will help your younger children?

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 07/04/2015 21:53

If it gives you peace then do it.

Just remind yourself that you'll be glued to it every minute, you'll be obsessed.

Take care.

Original poster

Lesausage · 07/04/2015 21:58

Good question worra and I did drip feed, I've recently name changed as found out sis has been mumsnetting it!

I was raped when I was 14 and had a son in secret, he was given up for adoption and I've been trying to "find" him. Since my assault and "losing" my son I've been on antidepressants etc but since I had my two children now I've been petrified something's going to happen to them.

My dr etc say it is normal to feel like this after my experience but sometimes it's overwhelming, having these, even just on them would let me relax a bit.

I wake up in the night screaming, having nightmares that something has happened or someone has taken them. It's horrific tbh.

OP posts:

MrsFlannel · 07/04/2015 21:58

Worra I thought the same but decided not to ask it...as however the OP lost her son is irrelevant. She's decided this think might make her feel better...that's all that matters.

MrsFlannel · 07/04/2015 21:59

THinking about it...however it was that the OP lost her child...doesn't matter. The loss of a child affects a parent so deeply that insecurity could arise either way.

Philoslothy · 07/04/2015 21:59

My children have a find my iPhone app on their phones so I can track their every move make sure they don't lose their phones.

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2015 22:04

Ahh I'm sorry to hear that OP

I think it's a great idea in the short term if it makes you feel better.

In the long term, could you/are you getting treatment for you anxiety?

PesoPenguin · 07/04/2015 22:04

If it is actually losing them that you're worried about then I guess those trackers would help, not so much at nursery as they won't be able to wander off, but they could be good in busy public places.

FWIW, I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to DS too and nothing terrible has happened to me. I'm not trying to minimise your fears, just say that I can empathise. It's horrible isn't it?

deadduck · 07/04/2015 22:04

Me to, Philoslothy. And it got me through the teenage years without losing sleep my mind. They both know though and are ok with it. My young adult daughter who can go out as long as she wants knows that if I wake up in the middle of the night and she's not home, it might her from having to answer a million frantic texts if I can see where she is.

But that's a bit off topic. YANBU at all.

LokiBear · 07/04/2015 22:09

I'm so sorry for all you have been through. I often say that I wish I could get my dd microchipped like my cats. Do what you need to do x

keepsmiling2015 · 07/04/2015 22:09

I'm so sorry that you lost your son

I'm wondering where the tracking device goes? If the children were lost then you could track them but surely there's a limited battery/chance if it falling off or being taken off by dc. Couldn't an adult take it also.

I know I sound negative but I'm trying to be helpful x

Original poster

Lesausage · 07/04/2015 22:10

worra I had a psychologist in my teens but I didn't like it, every time I spoke about it to someone it was reliving it over and over again.

I'm on fluoxetine now which I've been on for years and it helps a lot. I find if I keep stress to a minimum I'm not to bad, so dh deals with it if we get any problems etc like bills etc.

I also keep my dc very close helicopter parent here but I am getting better, I literally won't let them out of my sight that's why nursery everyday and ds4 going to school soon is daunting.

I coslept for the first few yrs and won't have a babysitter, only me, dh, my mum, dad and sister can look after them.

It seems pathetic but I'm trying really hard to be the best parent I can be and keep them as safe as humanly possible.

I can't go through "that" feeling again I just can't.

OP posts:

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 07/04/2015 22:11

MN is currently running a product test on something that may be relevant:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_product_tests/2335373-Do-you-have-a-child-aged-3-9-and-live-in-the-UK-If-so-sign-up-for-your-chance-to-try-LG-s-latest-communication-device-that-is-designed-with-families-in-mind-introducing-the-LG-KizON-NOW-CLOSED

The test is now closed, but may be worth keeping an eye out for when people report back.

FWIW, as you said its not just about DCs safety, its about your peace of mind. It is probably not going to make your child less safe, and if it helps to reduce your anxiety levels and thus improve your quality of life I cannot see why not

WorraLiberty · 07/04/2015 22:20

It doesn't sound pathetic at all OP.

I co-slept with all 3 of mine and only family have ever babysat, yet I was lucky enough not to have had an awful reason for it.

I think if it gives you peace of mind in the short term, you should get them. As long as you continue in the long term to seek help for your anxiety, which is of course completely understandable.

Fifis25StottieCakes · 07/04/2015 22:21

a while back i'm sure i saw a post on facebook, i think it was the lost kidz ? page regarding trackers which are watches, might be less bulky. I saw them somewhere i'm just not too sure if it was there. That facebook page usually have stuff about trackers and devices on it, I will log in and check the page name and that might be where the watches were

Fifis25StottieCakes · 07/04/2015 22:25

No it wasnt that page, that is a page similar to amber alert but they were discussing micro chips. I have no idea where i saw them

Fifis25StottieCakes · 07/04/2015 22:29

It was on that page, i have scrolled right back, its a device called the herO GPS watch, they were also discussing a device called the tile which relies on bluetooth which is not as safe

Original poster

Lesausage · 07/04/2015 22:30

Now I wish they had microchips :)

OP posts:

Original poster

Lesausage · 07/04/2015 22:30

Thank you fifis

OP posts:

Fifis25StottieCakes · 07/04/2015 22:37

YW, it looks pretty new and quite snazzy, something a young kid would want to wear with a few functions but i think its American, im sure we will get it here or something similar.

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