o believe someone feeding our pet for 2 days does not have to go into every room in the house

[Pebbles69]

ok, so I am often asked to feed my neighbours cats when they are away, no problem, she gives me the key. I pop in feed the cats in the morning and call in at dinner time and get them in and feed them , no problem. I sometimes bring my youngest daughter who stays with me at all times, straight in, straight out.

So we now have a pet rabbit, he has a hutch in the garden and a run in the house to run around. Neighbour offered to feed bunny whilst we were away, great I think. so I give her the keys. My kids and hubbie genuinely have OCD so are a little obsessive about where things are placed etc, not a problem I feel as she will only be popping in to feed rabbit , so no need what so ever to go anywhere else in the house.

Only we arrive home earlier than expected to find her in the house with her daughter ( no problem, lovely to see she has been taking care of bunny) only when she has left we discover she has been on all 3 floors of the house, her daughter has marked the wall s and stuck stickers ever where, has been in my teenage daughters room and emptied her perfumes, stiil stinks of perfume, has been in the other 2 kids rooms and trashed them, also discover someone has been in our bedroom on the middle floor including pulled back bedding etc and go into our study.

Am I being unreasonable in thinking she has abused our privacy?

YANBU. I would never do that.

I used to feed a friend's cat when she was away and other friends couldn't believe that I didn't nose around the house...

No you are not!

Absolutely! YANBU!!!

Could they have accidentally let the rabbit out and they had to search for it? Otherwise - that is most odd behaviour. Stickers?? Bedding moved?? I'd be having a word.

Yes she has. I would be miffed to say the least. Best not to ask her again if you cannot guarantee the child won't go wandering around the house. The neighbour might not be aware of what her daughter got up to but it would be easy to avoid future intrusions by not asking them again.

I'd be having words and telling them you will no longer feeding their pets either.

You only need to go into the room where the food is stored.

I feed NDN's cats when they are away and never go upstairs or in any other rooms of the house that is not a direct link to the kitchen apart from two occasions.

Once their burglar alarm was going off when DH and I arrived home and we both went in to check the house, I nipped upstairs and popped my head round the doors just to make sure everything looked ok.

Second time one of the cats ran upstairs and I had to go up and bring her back down. I wouldn't dream of doing anything else.

How very bizarre and rude - YANBU

Wtf?

Yadnbu! You have to say something. What on earth was she doing?

YANBU. Feeing someone animals does not give you permission to go nosing round heir house.

If her daughter has damaged your property then I'd definitely say something.

I'd say you were calling the police because there had been a break in and had she seen anything?

That's shocking! I came on ready to say we ask our neighbours to pop in and they scout round to check for water leaks etc, but never touch anything. We also put bread and milk in each other's fridges on the day we are due home.

Your daughter must be raging ... And rightly so.

I would never dream of snooping around someone's house while looking after their pets. I might ask them if they want me to open and close curtains, collect mail, take their bin out and leave a light on, and I'd find out where the animals were allowed to roam in the house, so I could appropriate close doors behind me if I did do any of the previous tasks with their agreement, but other than that I would focus on feeding and fussing the pet in the appropriate place, usually the kitchen.

YANBU, but you already know that! I'd be very pissed off but I wouldn't make a big deal of it... The potential for years of neighbour tensions is really not worth it...but I'd obviously never ask them to look after the pet in future.

i feed ndn cats and open/close curtains and collect post but would never dream of going upstairs or taking my DC with me

It sounds like she was allowing someone to stay there while you were away?

YANBU, I'd go apeshit! How bloody dare she?

Ooo, that's totally off!!

I feed pets for people. I'd use the toilet and possibly have a drink if I'd walked a long way to get there.

Stickers and perfume and trashing bedrooms is totally weird.

Did they apologise? Or explain why it happened??

Agree that they must've stayed there.

Why else would bedding be pulled back?

And her DD must have spent a few hours there to make that mess.

That's really strange. I think you need to have words and find someone else to do it next time.

I think the daughter was roaming around while the mother was busy with the rabbits. She may not even know about the stickers, perfume etc. if she just called her down when it was time to leave.

YANBU. When I was a child our pet sitter held a dinner party in our house and invited the neighbours. My mum was terribly upset when she found out.

I take my toddler with me when I feed my friend's cats. I don't even let him touch anything! We just go in, fill up bowls, leave. Doing anything else is just weird.

I would say some thing, how rude.

I would mention to her that various rooms looked as though they had had people in them and ask her if she knew anything about it.

(I am cat / house-sitting right now for the same people I've sat for for several years. I go into the kitchen / guest bathroom / guest bedroom and that's about it. I don't feel that I need to go into the other rooms.)

YANBU I thought maybe she had just gone round opening/closing curtains but this is ridiculous. I would have to ask her about why upstairs rooms have ended up messy, has there been an issue while we were away?

YANBU. When my MIL fed our cat, she sent my DH a text telling him we needed to tidy/sort our spare room out (we did but wtf!!), there was no need for her to go in there.