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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think these parents should have got off their arses!

102 replies

widdle · 01/04/2015 15:22

Yesterday I took my DS 20 months to the park. It wasn't very busy and is a biggish park. He was playing on a small slide when a little boy of about 3 or 4 came up and was being a bit aggressive. Not physical contact but pushing his chest out and pushing his face into my DS's. My DS didn't seem bothered - more curious really so I didn't do anything.

Anyway later on the same boy was on a bigger slide (one that has lots of platforms and tunnels). My DS went onto this slide and was going to go through a tunnel when the little boy came up to the tunnel on the other side and started being aggressive again, pushing his face into my DS's. So I said "Could you please not do that?" quite loudly, which was ignored so then "Could you please get out of the way?"

He said "But I want to get through the tunnel" and I told him that my DS was there first and that it wasn''t polite to block the way. To which he completely ignored me and then lay in the tunnel with his feet pointing towards DS.

At this point I was pissed off and took DS away.

This little boy's parents were sat down right next to the slide and they could definitely hear me as the mother was looking straight at me. AIBU to think that they should have got up and actually tried to control their little bantam cock of a child? Is this the done thing now? Just ignore your kid? Or am I an overbearing helicopter parent?

I know it's not a big deal but it really pissed me off!!

OP posts:
TheMoa · 01/04/2015 15:24

You do sound a bit precious, given that the child was only three of four.

I'd have left the children to it, they'd probably have made friends.

anothernumberone · 01/04/2015 15:25

The parents were arses but I am not sure how much understanding a typical 3 year old would have of the demands you were making on him. My 3 year old would not have a clue what you were saying mind you that is precisely why as you say the parents should have been adequately supervising.

BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 01/04/2015 15:25

The statement " cock of a child" makes anyone who is speaking about a 3 or 4 year old, sound like a prick.

26Point2Miles · 01/04/2015 15:28

yabu

Gileswithachainsaw · 01/04/2015 15:28

Yanbu. People seem to forget that little kids are perfectly capable of knowing what they are doing in many senarios. of course a three yr old knows what "dont do that" means or "move out the way"

let's face it they hear that sentence several times a day no doubt.

Gruntfuttock · 01/04/2015 15:29

anothernumberone I don't understand why a 3 year old wouldn't have a clue what the OP was saying. She wasn't saying anything in the least complex.

Gileswithachainsaw · 01/04/2015 15:29

I would have dragged my kids away off the slide for that

Original poster
widdle · 01/04/2015 15:29

Bantam cock as in acting like a bantam cock

Sheeesh !! Bugger!

OP posts:
mamapain · 01/04/2015 15:31

Parents sound lazy but you sound a bit over the top. Had I been the other parent I would have been wondering why you weren't leaving them to get on with it, but then I also wouldn't have minded if you had told my child off.

I'll admit after DC5 I got a bit lax about park supervision etc.

ChickenDipper22 · 01/04/2015 15:31

Yanbu, it would piss me off too. They should have got off their arses!

BuggerLumpsAnnoyed · 01/04/2015 15:32

Blush I retract my prick statement

Allstoppedup · 01/04/2015 15:33

The child doesn't sound like a "bantam cock" more like a curious 3 year old. My DS is only 15m but is very boisterous and it honestly is exhausting micro managing his every move. When we go to the park, if he's interacting and not being physically aggressive I would usually see how it panned out for a little while so he can learn more about interaction. Quite often two children can go from enemies to playmates in the blink of an eye.

I personally in this instance I would have stepped in and explained about turn taking/sharing so I agree with you that the parents could have done something but it also sounds like you were being a bit precious and perhaps talking to the child in a way that wouldn't have been particularly easy for him to understand.

mamapain · 01/04/2015 15:34

I'll also admit, I have no idea, although can make assumptions, as to what a Bantam Cock is.

anothernumberone · 01/04/2015 15:38

Grunt the typical 3 year old understands his/her own needs ie 'but I want to get through the tunnel', empathy and the needs of others are not really in place at that stage.

nochocolateforlentteacake · 01/04/2015 15:38

Boy chicken - strutty, loud, bossy, full if themselves...

Catsahoy · 01/04/2015 15:39

YANBU. I know children play and are boisterous. But surely interacting with others is a learning experience and if it were my child I would have intervened and ensured that they shared the equipment and showed consideration. All my friends are like this with their kids. (Think 'no, give that back, x was playing with it first. You can have a turn next etc)

littlesupersparks · 01/04/2015 15:40

I used to feel this way too... Then I had a 3 year old, then a 4 year old.

I probably would have intervened in the situation you describe, but toddlers are toddlers to be fair.

Joyfulleastersquad · 01/04/2015 15:43

I would have just let him through .....

BitOutOfPractice · 01/04/2015 15:44

OP if you are going to get this stressed about every toddler confrontation, you'll be exhausted by the time he's 2!

base9 · 01/04/2015 15:48

If another parent told my 3 yo to step aside, and he ignored that adult, I would indeed get up and intervene. I would not allow my 3 yo to push past an adult's reasonable command, and it sounds like the boy needed a quick word about how to play nicely.

IrianofWay · 01/04/2015 15:48

I think the phrase 'pick your battles' comes to mind. This one was your son's and they might well have sorted it out between them.

IrianofWay · 01/04/2015 15:49

BTW I knew what you meant by 'bantam cock'. It's quite an effective comparison IMO.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 01/04/2015 15:50

Oh dear, a face off at the park Wink.

You may often find awkward young children in a park, yes it can be annoying buy let it go over your head.

You say your boy wasn't bothered so you shouldn't be either, that being said , parents who just sit whilst their kids run amok are arses.

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 01/04/2015 15:51

*but

SantasLittleMonkeyButler · 01/04/2015 15:52

You may feel differently when your DS is 3 or 4.

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