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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this was an overreaction by new neighbours.

288 replies

DancingDays · 28/03/2015 16:55

House next to us has been empty for months. This afternoon I went to collect DDs from a party. When I went out the front door and I saw a removals van, couldnt see alot due to low sun in my eyes and didnt really want to look as they've all their belongings out. While loading DS into car, a man and woman appeared, I stuck my head over the car, said "Hi" they responded with a "Hi" and I drove off.

I return home and huddle DCS into the house as they are very nosey and ask 101 questions, I thought I would ease the new neighbours in gently once they have settled.

After a few minutes back home I hear a knock at the door, its the new neighbour. They have decided I am very rude to not welcome them and I have upset his wife. She's decided it's now a bad neighbourhood and wants to leave. Based on one 5 second interaction and 1/2 hour of me knowing they are there.

I explain I was busy collecting DCs and didnt want to disturb them while they are actually moving in.

He goes on and explains the only option is for me to go and apologise for my rudeness and go and get to know her. He said something along the lines of 'I expected more but that's the minimum acceptable'

He went to leave after my Hmm face and telling him I was busy with DCs but maybe I'll see them soon once things aren't so hectic for both of us. She then appeared at the door step, gave me a look of 'I'm waiting for an apology' then muttered "what's the point, she's left you on the doorstep" and stropped off back to their house.

I know moving is stressful but surely you don't confront your neighbours 'rudeness' within 1/2 hour of arrival.

OP posts:
ThingummyJigg · 28/03/2015 18:08

Go bang on their door and say WHERE'S MY BLOODY INVITE TO YOUR FUCKING NEW HOME PARTY YOU CUNTS

Then punch something furiously (something soft, like a shrub, an obnoxious one that deserves it) and storm off.

You can only communicate with crazy, with crazy.

Oh, and make sure you are attired in something inexplicable, like a cushion on your head and be brandishing a mop head (but not the handle.)

They will avoid you, peace will be restored, you and your children will play a fun game called 'let's pretend the neighbours are invisible and noiseless so they start wondering if they're actually ghosts.'

EduCated · 28/03/2015 18:10

Oh my word, that has to be some kind of record, surely?

FayKorgasm · 28/03/2015 18:10

The Italian in me would bring the new neighbours in and feed them and be nosey. The Irish in me would bring them in and feed them and be nosey. Grin

Pipbin · 28/03/2015 18:10

I agree with sending the children out to play in the garden early tomorrow. You can blame the clocks changing.

NobodyLivesHere · 28/03/2015 18:10

Why are people so fucking weird???

I actually know my nextdoor neighbour. Have known her since we were 4 years old. When I moved in we didn't even see each other for 3 days and then we said 'hi' and got on with our days -like normal people-

OrinocoTheWomble · 28/03/2015 18:10

It's sad when neighbours can't get on. I chat to all my neighbours. Except Mrs Blah who lives next door. She's pure evil.

Pipbin · 28/03/2015 18:12

Thinking again though I'd pop a card through the door inviting them in for tea and cake. Then you can probe them for details and set boundaries at the same time.

bumbleymummy · 28/03/2015 18:15

Hopefully they're on a short rental contract!

Groovester · 28/03/2015 18:16

Absolute mentalists Confused

clam · 28/03/2015 18:17

We have one grumpy neighbour out of a close full of lovelies. He doesn't ever speak to any of us - just the occasional shake of the fist when driving past.
Or I should say he didn't ever speak to us. He actually died this week. We all sent nice cards to his even grumpier wife.
The British, eh?

Nanny0gg · 28/03/2015 18:18

Mad as a box of frogs.

However, you just know your five dogs are going to piss them off, don't you?
Even if they only ever bark for a second.

Do you have a trampoline in the back garden?

LoonyToonie · 28/03/2015 18:24

Time to buy your DC that drum kit they've always wanted Grin

TormundsMember · 28/03/2015 18:25

They sound awful! They were far more rude than you were! Coming round to tell you off for not being welcoming enough just after they've arrived? wtf? They seem to have a rather high opinion of themselves.

florentina1 · 28/03/2015 18:26

Can you imagine the title of her post if she is a Mnetter. AIBU that my new neighbour did not abandon her Dcs to bake me a welcome cake.

Fairy13 · 28/03/2015 18:28

norah are you the neighbour?

CurlyWurlyCake · 28/03/2015 18:29

Bonkers.

PoisonPension · 28/03/2015 18:29

I felt a bit sorry for her DH. The guy is making a right knobs of himself in his worshiping of the Madonna you have living next door. I then thought he is an adult.

pepperfish · 28/03/2015 18:30

Whhaaatt!!!!

Mine came round yelling at us within the first half an hour of us moving in about 'the noise' (us moving boxes in). 2 years in and she's proved herself to be a miserable old cow and I dread seeing her.

Not at all helpful, i'm sorry - but it does sound as if they are going to be a pain.

Maybe go round to 'talk' at least once, if that doesn't work, then remain aloof and hope you don't bump into them too often...

toomuchicecream · 28/03/2015 18:31

I agree - invite them round for tea/scones/cake. But (and this is the important bit) invite as many other neighbours as you can to be there at the same time. Firstly, you've got moral support and back up if they go bat shit on you. Secondly, you can pretend that you've organised a big welcome party for them. And thirdly, your other neighbours will all know how mad they are so you can sympathise with each other.

Of course, when they are faced with a group of you they might just back off and act normal, which will give you the chance to start all over again with them, pretending that the craziness this morning didn't happen.

More importantly, you can report back to us :)

The80sweregreat · 28/03/2015 18:33

You were doing exactly what i would have done - i had a really nosy neighbour once and was a real pita, so i try to not be like this, especially as children do like to ask questions etc. they sound really weird. I,would try to avoid if you can.. Good luck..

EhricLovesTheBhrothers · 28/03/2015 18:34

Wow. I didn't think people behaved like that in real life.

QTPie · 28/03/2015 18:34

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 28/03/2015 18:35

Mad as a box of frogs clearly.

Did you say she is Italian? Some of my closest friends are Italian and they are not exactly what you would call calm cool and collected.

iliketeaalot · 28/03/2015 18:40

I like ice cream's idea or alternatively just send round your eldest with the dogs. They sound mad.

Minion · 28/03/2015 18:46

Can you go all ten second Tom on them? Let the kids in on the secret, go round and introduce yourself and every ten seconds, do it again.
Let this run for a minute or two then have the oldest kid ask if you have taken your pills today.
At that, have them gently usher you away, whilst muttering about how they were so rude, they didn't invite you in.