To not want to adjust my language for an adult?

[CupidStuntSurvivor]

I've been on a course for a couple of weeks and have a couple more weeks left. It's a very interactive course with a lot of discussion involved. Around 30 students in total. A very mixed group.

Today, once one of the students left the room, the tutor informed us that the woman had requested he talk to us about our language. Not about swear words, as I'd originally thought he'd meant, but about phrases like 'oh my God' and other exclamations with a biblical theme. It was quite obviously in reaction to one student's frequent use of the phrase which was offending this woman. The tutor told us that this student planned to 'say something' next time anyone said anything like this.

Many of us felt very conscious of offending this student afterwards and some (including myself) felt quite put out by it, struggling to concentrate for a while after.

AIBU to think that as a traditionally Christian country, it's inevitable that biblical terms have become part of our language? And AIBU to think that tolerance works both ways and that though we could all try to avoid saying these things, she shouldn't feel entitled to tell people off for them if they do get said, them not being inherently offensive?

The tutor spoke to them because their choice of vocabulary upset another student.
So the tutor "had a word with them"

I wouldn't make a mountain out of a molehill. Tone your language down. You probably wouldn't say it in front of children.

The way you phrased it suggested the tutor a) took it upon themselves to point it out and wasn't complained to by the offended woman and b) singled the OP out as the problem. But my bad if I misinterpreted.

Collectively Wolfie, the class as a whole were saying things like this quite frequently, with one particularly enthusiastic student coming out with things like that quite often. The nature of what was being covered today meant we were recounting extraordinary experiences, so I for one didn't think it was excessive in the circumstances. When the tutor spoke to us about it (all of us...she didn't have a word with any of us as individuals), not a single person in the room, many of whome are religious, thought that a) anything that was said was offensive or b) that our language had been excessively religious overall.

iwish I would actually. And really can't think of anyone I know personally IRL, religious or not, who wouldn't.

Where I live, it's considered offensive by many people so I don't say it and I have taught my children not to say it.

There's a kind of hierarchy of swearing-

OMG
Shite
Shit
Fuck
OMFG
Cunt

Ok, you can switch those around a bit for your own preferences, but I think most of us of an agnostic/irreligious background would consider that OMG would be at the less extreme end. So in an informal situation where you're in discussions with your peers then most people would make the unconscious decision that maybe the top two would be ok, three a bit near the knuckle, and four or below....well, people are much more likely to think "steady on". It's pretty hard to change those unconscious thoughts and to change your speech when it's so ingrained.

Also you're on a course, you meet maybe once, twice a week? Probably ending in May or June? You don't need to spend the rest of your life with these people. Is it really worth having the tutor say something at this point? If she felt strongly about it I would make much more of an effort if she said to me, "please don't say that, I find it offensive", than have a tutor intervene on her behalf to correct what is fairly normal speech. Have the courage of your convictions and your faith to say you have an issue.

I would try and be sensitive to it, but not restrictive in my language. If cornered about it I would say that, fortunately, it's a free country but not a free class. You've paid to be taught by that teacher, not to be dictated to by someone else in the class who is trying to control everyone else.

It's one thing if people were spouting hate and other such things, but you wouldn't make your statement and then go back, you'd leave the class because it's obviously not for you.

If I wanted to be funny I would say "words with the letter 'y' offend me. Refrain from using them". When told you're being ridiculous, it's too hard to police that, say "Exactly. You're asking us to police our thoughts in an educational environment. I'm trying to learn. I shouldn't be sitting here thinking about what I'm going to say to make sure I conform to what you want to hear."

Just managed to have a proper read through and wanted to clarify something that I probably haven't managed to get across to some of you...

I have no issue attempting to avoid religious references to an extent (obviously can't speak for the full class) but I would greatly object to being told off by a fellow student should I not manage this because my primary concern in class is the subject I've paid a substantial sum to learn.

I think, bar obvious medical issues, that most adults can refrain from using a phrase others find offensive, for a restricted period.

After all, you presumably manage not to bawl 'fucking cunt!' at acquaintances, don't you?

I also think anyone over 16 trilling OHMIGOOOOOOOD every other sentence does themselves no favours in a professional situation.