what ARE we allowed to be judgy about?

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according to MNetters, we shouldn't judge parents who let their children get tattoos; people who let their 14 yo dd sleep with a boyfriend;people who don't give up their seats on buses; people who feed their kids shite day in and day out;people who are happy to live on benefits when they are capable of working..teenagers who go off to Syria to join terrorist groups..... the list goes on.
is there anything acceptable to be judgy about or is every lifestyle choice acceptable and no comment should be made

The trouble with being judgy is no one likes,being judged back.

Exactly MinceSpy. Be as judgy as you like, just be prepared for those that disagree with you, or who want to give an alternative insight into the thing you are judging.

I judge .
I've never met anyone in RL who doesn't.

There is a fine line between being judgey and having an opinion. I think balancing on that line is very difficult and can perhaps depend on the language being used.

In my opinion, a grown woman using 'yummy mummy' to describe herself is sad and more than a little pathetic (social conditioning). But letting your child get a tattoo? I couldn't give a shit.

Be as judgy as you like but be prepared to be challenged for it. If you have opinions strong enough to post surely you are prepared to defend you position. If not go and write a blog and turn off the comments.

You can be judgy about people who actually like their children and use words like 'entitled' and 'pfb' when those people treat them like actual people with rights and needs,it seems.

You are allowed to judge anyone "middle class" and above or those with more money than you.

UKIP.

Crime in general.
Violence, particularly domestic violence and abuse, child abuse.
Judginess.

I agree that you can judge whatever you want, but be careful what you are vocal about.

allowing an under 18 year old to get a tattoo is a crime but seems to be fine in MN

I think the priblem with judging (and we do all do it) is that you make an assumption about a scenario that you know very little about.
For example one of my boys was a total pain as a teen, lying, stealing, runnjng away, doing drugs etc. it would have been easy to judge my parenting although behind the scenes I was trying everything I could do sort it out.
My four other kids are fine so my parenting must be ok.
Easy to judge though.

I am judgey about tomatoes. Hate them . And gravy. Yuck.

What's the point of being judgy though? What are you trying to achieve?

In the end, you don't know the individual circumstances behind people's decisions. So how are you qualified to judge? Walk a mile in their shoes and all that.

It's just I have never met people in RL who would not be horrified at a lot of the stuff on here that Mnetters say each to their own / could have a hidden disability etc. It's a weird place sometimes

Allowing a child to get a tattoo suggests Jeremy Kyle material to me.

I agree with ThatBloodyWoman

I've noticed that it appears to be acceptable to judge caravans (fucking ugly and lower the tone of the neighbourhood if kept on driveways) and toilet cleanliness (no excuses under any circumstances, contrast with claiming to not be able to afford to feed your children or feeding them shite, where there are a myriad of possible reasons why this might not be possible ranging from poverty, depression, SNs, likes and dislikes, lack of cooking facilities or equipment, cost of utilities, transport, available food stores within walking distance etc etc).

So despite the 'Mumsnet standard' of acceptable toilet cleanliness involving daily cleaning with copious amounts of bleach, disposable wipes, rubber gloves and one use only toilet brushes, there is no excuse for anyone not to achieve this.

Oh, and nannies must not expect to receive the same equal treatment wrt employment law and maternity rights as all other women because it inconveniences their employer.

you see eve that's exactly the attitude every person I have ever met in real life would have. On here, you'd get pasted for saying it.

The problem with judging is the small snippets of information, my mother paid for a tattoo for my 15 year old brother and on face value deserves to be judged. Two pages later I then tell you she did it to disguise a nasty scar which he was so embarrassed about he never left the house in the summer, never went swimming and would school refuse on PE days. This was many decades ago and at the time she did the right thing. On mumsnet people judge ( give opinions) only for a couple of post later for the OP to give more information and make those before look like nasty cows. What is the difference of opinions and judging.

I've learnt to judge less than I did before as my judgements have been proven wrong on quite a few occasions.

For example, I open a thread on MN read the OP and think YABU/YANBU etc and then I read the first few posts see another point of view and think, 'oh, I hadnt thought of that' and then I change my mind.

So I'm less judgemental now because I realise that my initial inpressions aren't always right.

I judge.
We all judge.
I do think that there is a difference in saying "I'd not do that/let my child do that" and "You fecking eejit, what a stupid, irresponsible idea" when we really know v little about the full picture.

Unless your on the sweary thread

It's a weird place sometimes - exactly .

I get judgey about the weird double standards on here - anything a man or a MIL does is 'wrong'.

Oh, yes, and what Koala said - I am less judgemental since learning a lot about a lot on MN

Ledkr, you've hit the nail on the head - people do make assumptions all the time, we are all judged on a daily basis and anyone who says that they don't do this are not being entirely true! Its human nature, unfortunately. The problem with this forum ( which I do like by the way) is you only ever get one side of the story.