what ARE we allowed to be judgy about?

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according to MNetters, we shouldn't judge parents who let their children get tattoos; people who let their 14 yo dd sleep with a boyfriend;people who don't give up their seats on buses; people who feed their kids shite day in and day out;people who are happy to live on benefits when they are capable of working..teenagers who go off to Syria to join terrorist groups..... the list goes on.
is there anything acceptable to be judgy about or is every lifestyle choice acceptable and no comment should be made

Really? You know nobody in RL that might think "that child/person could have a hidden disability?"

That says a lot, doesn't it?

There... see? I've judged you. Are you happy now?

IME you don't get 'pasted' much on here is you stay clear of AIBU
And the response you get also depends on the way the question is asked, I think.

Yes, Alice, it does say a lot

There also appears to be a lot of judging on quality of posts in terms of spelling punctuation and grammar, although recently people are starting to challenge posters who pull up others on errors in spelling etc.

You are allowed to judge women who care about their appearance and the opinions of their husbands but you are not ever allowed to judge women who allow boyfriends to abuse their children or who abuse them themselves.
You may judge working mothers as much as you like but you must never judge women who never work, have no intention of ever working but have 7 children by 5 different fathers. Chances are all the fathers are Contraceptive Abusers.

I only tend to judge the tawdry and fatuous.

MN has certainly opened my eyes, and not always in a good way.

People ARE judgy on MN. Very much so.

This is going to be a delightful thread full of lovely viewpoints

Get all the information, then judge. No problem with that, it's part of how our culture works to stop people behaving in an anti-social way.

I am on the kid tattoo thread I don't think it'sfine. Being judgemental is all well and good but you need people to agree with you some do so don't so you are allowed to be judgey

Your in laws, especially your MIL.

i I love being judgy; it makes me feel warm and superior. it's only recently that I u derstood that no-one else gives a flying shite about my opinion of them so it doesn't really seem to do much harm!

Mrs Wooster.

The problem with never judging is that eventually, we tolerate the intolerable.

Kim147 put it well along with others here. And PP who say how much they have learnt from MN or how it makes them think. I have certainly re-thought some of my views since joining.

BUT the "not allowed to judge" thing is ridiculous because every decision we make is based on judging a person or situation. We go on the info we have got and the experience we have gained and make a call. We may revise the decision - and that happens on MN as different viewpoints and experiences come in to play - but it is not a sin to judge.

You can judge people. But if you choose to post about it, be prepared for people to disagree. Personally if I am approaching my judgy pants, I usually ask myself if it effects me, if not I put them away. Tbh what people do is to them, I may disagree but can't be bothered get worked up about it.

People can live as they please providing it doesn't cost others or impact negatively on other people. So - have 23 kids by all means but don't expect me to pay for them.

Armchairathlete has an excellent point.

Having an opinion is one thing judging other people's choices and circumstances is another

I worry about people who say i don't judge anything it's like they live in their own bubble

Notsolovely you do sound lovely. :)

Of course everyone judges but I think gleefully posting it on here is a step too far and always try to see the other side.

I think refusing to judge and comment on persistently foolish or self-destructive life choices is wrong and cruel. You could even see it as a covert form of sadism, as you watch the same people cock up again and again. At the very least it's often a way of avoiding having to think or care about the suffering of others, under the guise of 'not judging'.

IMO the liberal desire to be tolerant and open minded is mostly well-meaning but when taken to the MN extreme it's more about posturing, in a 'look at how kind and open-minded I am' way, than it is about genuine empathy or even interest in the welfare of others.