AIBU to move DD to London

[BusyHomemaker]

I'm a single parent, living in my home town in the East Midlands. Job opportunities are, frankly, abysmal. DD's father moved away two years ago but does come back to see her once a fortnight. I never meant to end up back in my home town, ex lost his job so it was needs must situation. We split over two years ago due to his emotional abuse, and following counselling and a lot of work I finally feel like myself again. Divorce proceedings are underway. My parents have been supportive and are close to DD but I find them suffocating and they can be quite controlling... They seem to view me as a 33yr old child! They mean well but I have always found my relationship with them more manageable (and still close) when living away. I have lived in various places since uni, including abroad for a short time so I'm not particularly attached to my home town, as lovely as the people are.

I have lived in London in the past for over two years and absolutely adore the place. I have taken DD to the museums twice (she's 3) and she loves it too. I still have friends there.

An agency in my home town have put me forward for a role as Receptionist/Admin for an accountancy firm for 20K. I have been running my own craft business whilst caring for my daughter but now itching to get back into the workplace. This is similar to the work I did when living in London before... In Canary Wharf and Moorgate. My plan is to do this job for 12/18mths, saving a few thousand (entirely possible, according to my budget) and aim to move down during the summer before DD starts school. She's due to start Sept 2016. I've been considering where to live and my preference so far is Muswell Hill as it seems family friendly, good schools, fairly close to friends, about 20 min commute to city, easy to get to Kings Cross for seeing family in East Midlands and also DD's dad (based in Sheffield). I know rents are high but if I aim for a salary of 30K I think it's doable for two bed flat. I would also get £200 pm child maintenance and £20 pw CB

Am I mad? Is this just a pipe dream or can I make it a reality? I desperately want to!!

I'm interested in other people's views/tips/shared experience.

TIA

OP, I used to work in PA and admin. recruitment. I know a few good contacts. PM me if you like and I can put you in touch.

I don't think you'd be able to afford Muswell Hill on that budget. What's the maximum you can pay afford for rent per month?

I would move to Cambridge! 50 minutes direct train into kings cross, and excellent culture and schools.

Hungry Cambridge is also expensive. Plus yes 50 mins into Kings x but depends how far you live from station and how far you work from London station. My boss lives in Cambridge and its 1 hr 45 mins door to door for her.

I rented in Muswell Hill well over ten years ago and was on around 30k then. I really think you will struggle. As a PP mentioned, Walthamstow might be a good option for you. I lived there and loved it, and it's come up a lot since I moved away. There were some really good primaries around the Lloyd Park area but, as I moved away a few years ago, this info may be out of date.

Thank you scrunchie I have messaged you!

Forgot to add, good luck OP, you sound really positive and determined, and I hope it all works out for you and your DD!

London is awesome _ but Muswell Hill expensive. Go for South East London!

Muswell Hill is too expensive for your wage. If you're looking to work in Canary Wharf etc you need to be looking to rent in East London (which is still probably too expensive) or even Kent borders. You'll need to move soon as school applications will close in Jan 2016 for Sept 2016.

London's great but please do your research and sums correctly as you don't want to move somewhere only to struggle.

Good luck.

Look at Catford, Sydenham, Forest Hill op

I live in Muswell Hill and work in Canary Wharf. Takes about an hour and a quarter, so probably not what you're looking for in terms of commute.

OP, I go in to work on the line you talk about and yes, the commute is not a hassle and does take the advertised time! We don't normally get many cancellations either, not as much on the other line that runs through N.London (seven sisters)

As I pay for a full zone 5 travel card (£210 a month) I make the most of it and use it for taking the kids out at weekends and going out in London alot. TBH I absolutely love it but I agree that Cambridge is a good suggestion. It is where we looked at moving to for a while and the fast train through Kings Cross makes it viable. As irongnome suggests Catford is also a good option, its the new 'buzz' place, so look there too!

Thanks again for all your responses. Can anyone advise me on how much wrap around care costs (before and after school).

I'm looking for the shortest possible commute (aren't we all!!) purely due to being single parent. My family wouldn't be able to cover school holidays as they all work so it makes no difference where I live in that respect as I'd have to pay out for it anyway... ouch!!

As stated by a pp paying an annual rent which is a third of your annual salary seems about right, IF I was on £30K then my ideal rent would be £200 per week/£870 pcm. Hmmm.

mickey the travel cards are one of the things I love about London. Genuinely. Having the freedom to go where ever you please is a real joy.

I've checked out Cambridge and didn't realise how expensive is it to rent there.

I will look into Catford more :)

My commute is just under 40 mins. I am in zone 5, I get the 7.52 and am in Oxford Circus for 8.29. Canary Wharf is harder to get to, I wouldn't know the timings for that.

For comparison; we rent out our tiny one bed flat in Enfield town for £850pcm. I think you either need to up your rent or start looking outside the M25 for that price

£870pcm might get you somewhere very small around Mitcham or maybe Eltham. I do think you should look at a one bed flat.

Yes, I think a one bed flat may be a good idea, initially.

It's costs £28 for before and afternoon care at my ds's school. That's 7.30-9am, 3.30-6.30pm. We don't use but I think it includes breakfast and dinner. So £140 a week approx. It's £75 for a full day during holidays!

As everyone else has said, Muswell Hill is not doable on that budget and school places will be very hard to come by. I used to live very near to there but made the move South of the River 16 years ago and I've never looked back.

You are looking at £350/400 for a two bedroom flat in forest hill or Sydenham.

I've just done a rough benefits check and I would be entitled to tax credits and a little bit of housing benefit (obvs this differs in certain areas) which would make wrap around care and rent of about £1100 affordable. This would leave enough for living costs and a decent amount of disposable income. I would rather earn enough to not rely on tax credits/benefits but if it helps me build a career and a good life for DD then I'll take it!

Thanks so much for all of your replies, I really do appreciate you taking the time to read through this and offer your views/advice. I could be up all night researching this so gonna drag myself off to bed!

Even with 1100/month for rent I think you would struggle to be honest. It is not unheard of to pay 200/week for a room in a shared flat. Its crazy but the reality of London rents!

For your budget you would have to be looking pretty far out, which means a long commute and possibly spending more on childcare too, and realistically you would still only get a studio/one bed.

I would definitely look at the Lloyd Park area of Walthamstow. Winns Primary is right in the middle and is a v large school so you wouldn't need to worry about catchment. 15 mins walk to Victoria Line tube, 15-20 mins to Kings Cross. Lloyd Park itself has had a huge makeover, lovely playground now and William Morris House is fab with a nice cafe. Most of the flats have garden access. We live in Chingford, cheaper rents but longer commute. Highams Park also lovely and has a rail link to Liverpool St, v family friendly area. There are lots of Facebook groups for mums and these are a hive of local info re schools etc, definitely worth searching for and joining these. I think you should make the move, just do your research first! Local councils issue primary school admissions guides every year and these contain useful info about cutoff distances for schools, easily available online so check those out.

I am desperately trying to get the hell out of London. So is virtually everyone else our age with kids and most have already gone. I'm born and bred here and used to adore it but I cannot imagine why anyone would put themselves and their dd through this upheaval to live here. IME you won't generally have the time, money or energy to go to all these amazing cultural events etc. Working culture is full on, commuting is knackering, the schools are awful and everything is cripplingly expensive. If you loved the city 10 years ago, I'd say there's a high chance you might not love it so much now. Many will disagree I know, but worth a thought.

Hi, OP - yes to the suggestions of East London - and relatively easily accessible for Canary Wharf and City.

Stratford is on the Jubilee line (direct line to Canary Wharf and London Bridge), and within your budget.

I live one tube stop away from Canary Wharf, and two tube stops aways from London Bridge, in SE London (Surrey Quays / Canada Water / Rotherhithe - call it what you will) - but this is now outside your target price range. (And (some of) the schools are notorious...).

Best of luck!!