to bu towards phone scam callers and wind them up ?

[mrsfuzzy]

i don't think so but you may disagree. this evening i had some foreign sounding guy call up about my 'recent car accident', he wanted details to confirm he had the right person, and advised that i'd be in line for compensation, realising it was a scam, i did not give him any details but let him run with it, and asked how much it would be etc, he was rattling around looking for answers and trying to ask me things about my bank account etc, after about 10 minutes i got bored and said 'oh, by the way, i haven't driven for the past year, and this call has been recorded for the police..' strange how quick he put the phone down. since i started winding them it's surprising how the number of calls have dropped, tps does not seem to work for calls outside the u.k.

Me and my sister were left home one day and wound up a scam caller so much, he called back over 50 times (we counted). Towards the end, we'd answer, he'd just hiss down the phone "I fucked your mother" or some equally charming outburst, and hang up.

We found it hilarious

I've had my head cut clean off my shoulders in an industrial accident. I can't for the life of me think why they don't believe me!

I should be entitled to some compensation surely?

OrangePeels I used DS's My First Laptop and he twigged whenI was asked what I could see on the screen and I said " A mun-kee on a spaceship"

I too have had abuse

We had the Microsoft scammers call us at work, they're very pushy.

Scammer: Hello, this is Microsoft calling, we can see you have a virus on your home computer that is causing critical errors, we've called to help. Are you near the home computer?
Me: No. I am at work. You've called a shop. We have no computer.
Them: You don't have a computer?
Me: I have several at home, all of which are running fine thanks, most run Linux, not Windows for what it's worth, but you have called a shop. There are no computers here, only a till.
Them: Are you trying to say that there is no computer at all where you are now?
Me: Yes, that's exactly what I am saying. This is a chinese takeaway. There are no computers, only a computerised till system.
Them: Ah, that must be it, if you can just press the start button I can talk you through what to do next.
Me: It. Is. A. Till. This. Is. A. Shop.
Them: On the computer till, if you just press the start button, the blue circle with the coloured squares in left hand corner of the screen
Me: In the left hand corner of my screen there is a button for side orders, would you like chips or rice? It is a till. This is a shop you have called.
Them: Is there a computer in the office?
Me: There is no office. We do all the banking and paper work off site. There are no computers here.
Them: This virus is very serious, Miss, it could corrupt your whole network and send vital information out to criminals, if you can let us help we can prevent that and keep your information safe. If you'll just turn on the computer and press the start button, I can talk you through what to do next.
Me: What part of this is a shop are you finding hard to understand?
Them: Once the computer has started up if you just press...
Me: I am sorry but a customer has just walked in. Bye.

I'd have just put the phone down but it was a slow night and I was bored

I have answered the microsoft scam in a variety of ways depending on my mood but got a bit of a fright once. I think I must have been pre menstral because I told 'Colin' he was a scammer and a thief. He got abusive so I hung up, he rang back and left a really long message (until the machine ran out of space) describing how he was going to hunt me down and kill me! Then he started on my family. Not nice.

I've tried a few...

In an old rented house someone kept calling for the previous tenant trying to sell double glazing, despite explaining it was rented, she no longer lived there and politely declining they still called twice a night. Thankfully when I said "I'm sorry I'm not interested I'm dead." They stopped calling

We also had the MS scam one, several days running always when DP was trying to settle our youngest for his nap, one day I was home and DP just passed the phone to me, I work in IT security, I kept them chatting for a few minutes "while my laptop booted up" then promptly said "thank you for that, we've now been able to trace this call the police will be around shortly" they hung up and didn't call back

And the one I've stolen from a book I'm reading, "Sorry this is a crime scene, I need to know your name and address and your connection to the murder victim" They hang up pretty sharpish

Caller "Hello, I'm calling from the claims department about your accident"
My friend "Oh, good - how is he? Is he out of intensive care yet?"
Caller "What... er... who?"
My friend "The little boy I ran over of course, is he going to be ok?"

I am soooo going to use the crime scene one! That sounds like fun...

"Sorry this is a crime scene, I need to know your name and address and your connection to the murder victim"

that is brilliant almost worth getting a landline again for

The chugger who did a star jump and landed in front of me about three inches from my face got told to fuck off.

Usually I give them the death stare and ask them to take one step to the right then I carry on walking and ignore them.

taxi4ballet

That is pure genius!

Just want to say thank you to everyone on this thread for making me laugh so much :)

Speak in a furrin language. Get a holiday phrasebook from the library and learn the basic "how are you today?" I get so many calls, I'm alternating my scripts according to days of the week. They put the phone down really fast if you answer in Welsh.

I've also told a PPI caller (in English!) that I thought some identity fraud had gone on if his records said I was owed thousands, because I'd never had a loan to pay PPI on. He argued with me about it, and started listing types of loan.

Last week, I told a woman calling about compensation for a car accident that it couldn't have been me, because I never left the house.

My accent must be becoming more convincing! Some life insurance people just put the phone down after three seconds of German.

Them: Hello Mrs GoodHusband [f*ckers ALWAYS assume I have DH's name], how are you today?

Me: That depends: have you accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour?

Them: (splutter)
Me: Fear not, for although we are all SINNERS in the eyes of ALMIGHTY GOD, if you get down on your knees and beg forgivness, YOU SHALL BE SAVED! I exhort thee to turn aside from the EVIL ONE and REPENT!! REPENT!!!

Them: (click!)

Pretty foolproof. Even if they say they are born again, the marvellous thing about religion is that you can then claim it's the wrong kind of born again, and resume your exhortation.

Brilliant drbadbride !!

No disrespect intended to the lovely Christians who quietly draw people to their faith by living good lives of kindness an generosity.

Those buggers with the megaphones who berate you in the street, on the other hand...

These are brilliant!!

However may I add a word of caution,

'Phone rings ,
ME Hello

Foreign voice Is that MRS 2old

ME at top of my voice PISS OFF BASTARD

Little voice says "This is the hospital about your son's blood results"

Fortunately he was amused

Meanwhile ...

www.theregister.co.uk/2015/03/12/nuisance_call_ico_raids_call_centre/

UK data privacy watchdogs raided Thursday a call centre allegedly linked to millions of nuisance calls.

Officers from the ICO (Information Commissioner's Office) and Trading Standards conducted the operation against a business in the Brighton area suspected of using automatic dialling technology to make four to six million recorded telephone calls a day about debt management or payment protection insurance.
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I had two cold calls from the same call centre today, I try not to be rude (but it is hard at times)

The first one, went through a whole intro about not wanting anything from me, just a few consumer questions...ok, I am happy to answer questions about my opinion on products, but not personal details.

Very first question.....

them: please confirm full name and address
Me: err no, that is a personal detail.
them: but I need you to confirm
me: No, I don't know who you are, I don't know who you work for, I am happy to answer questions about products, but I wouldn't be answering questions about personal details
them: but we aren't a cold caller...

They then hung up on me 5 minutes into my explanation about why they were the very definition of a cold caller.

The second time, as soon as they said who they were, I just stopped them, and said if your first question isn't what are my personal details say now, or goodbye. They didn't say anything so I hung up.

YANBU.DH loved winding up people who call from "Microsoft"about computer issues they can fix online.He asks them allsorts of nosey questions.

Dh great uncle once kept a double glazing firm on the phone for ages , agreeing with them that he would like to save money and have a warmer house. They got as far as an estimate, and then he said that was a lot of money and they discussed finance options. then he came out with the gem "and would you really take me on then, i am 96 you know". they hung up. he'd really enjoyed himself winding them up and having something entertaining to do for a bit!

The next ones who phone about "the accident", I'm going to either burst into tears, or tell them yes it was awful, in fact I died.

My 88 year old father says , in an outraged tone, " do you KNOW what day this is in the Jewish calendar?" He says they always apologise for disturbing him and hang up immediately. He is not Jewish . One day he'll have a caller who is. Get out of that one then, dad.

I have a megaphone at home just for these type of phone calls and the children. It even plays olez, olez olez olez........ Burst a few ear drums in my time I have.

We are signed up with telephone preference but still get lots of calls!

I recently started a thread about 'mcas' who are persistant callers. They say they can get back money from old endowments etc etc yawn
The other night went like this;
Mcas: hello I was asked to phone mr donut at 6

Me; well why are you phoning now, it's only 5

Mcas;splutter,splutter, it's how our calls work,is mr donut there?

Me; yes but he doesn't want to speak to you

He then pleaded with me for a bit and then got nasty and said "I shall stay on the line until you get mr donut on the line"
So I put the phone on the chair next to me and watched TV, every time I listened in he was ranting and raving. He was on that line a good 20 minutes