To think my cat done this on purpose

[Whiteandbrownrabbit]

Bloody git

He done a poo on both bathroom mats

His done a big one in the main bathroom, on the mat and small one in the ensuite

Why the heck has he done this

I'm with MNHQ on this one it's about time it fucking stopped.

I don't think MNHQ are policing the grammar police. They are deleting the OP's incendiary responses.

Is your life really that pathetic? Perhaps consider getting out a bit more dear.

My bastard cat does the puke thing. There is ONE room with carpet. ONE!!! she pukes there every fucking time! Then watches me while I scrub it out.

She also only goes for a shit while I am either eating or have company. Then licks her arse in the middle of whichever room I/we happen to be in while staring straight at me. wtf is that about?!

I'm not talking about just this threads deletions.

Is it too much to ask that we make more of an effort to find stuff to fall out over? Is it? Is it really?!

Honey calm down dear, you aren't even making sense. Do you need a slap or some smelling salts?

My dog once walked into the house, into the lounge, walked up to the sofa, threw up on it and then walked out back to the garden.

I mean in fairness, it was a fucking awful sofa, but there was no need.

Surely any adult can tell the difference between grammar and dialect yeah? I can imagine them going through their kids' books with written out accents with a red pen

They don't do it to be malicious OP, but they will do it if they are sad/stressed and that could be because of something you did. Cats like to be somewhere safe and especially to shit or puke somewhere safe. Safe means 'stinks of me and my owners and is quiet' pretty much. Did he used to be able to go upstairs before the baby maybe?

Neither. I just want row with grammar or punctuation.

You can slap me as long as it's uncapitalised with a misplaced Oxford Comma.

Thats ok rally everyone allowed mistakes but it does hurt (i used to wish i could oil my brain to make it work better as i could never understood why it wouldnt work like other people) so can see where whiteandbrown rabbit came from. Now i see dyslexic as the best gift you could have. Anyway Will someone please think of the cats!!!!. Back to topic....

A row.

I'll relent on actual missing words

The grammar police are cunts.

rina you sound like you know what you are talking about. Why does my cat do the Shitting and arse licking thing I posted a minute ago? It seems a bit weird and exhibitionist-y to me!!

OK, OK. Now what are your views on abortion, middle-class offerings at food banks and SAHMs?

Disclaimer: I have never criticised anyone's grammar on here. Go through my posts; you'll find a lot of ill-researched views, you'll love it. I only ever do it at work, for 'tis my job (and occasionally to my husband, who is Oxbridge-educated and sometimes needs taking down a peg or two).

cats aren't humans, that aren't capable of doing anything for revenge or on purpose or any other of that stupid humanising bollocks.

if he's shit on the mats in a room he's not normally allowed into its about territory and mixing his scent with yours, no more, no less.

you should allow him up there supervised, occasionally, so up there also smells of him, it won't happen then.

cats aren't capable of doing anything for revenge or on purpose

I used to believe that ... !

I'm more concerned about the shit possibly having been there since yesterday than the Op's grammar tbh!

OMG, how thick am I - I've just noticed this:

he's not normally allowed upstairs and we have stair gates

Stair gates? You think a cat can be defeated by a stair gate??!!

I think cats are capable of acts of revenge and sabotage. They know when something is not allowed and get all sheepish when caught, they hide, run away, etc.

Mine was so miffed with me about the kitten she sat facing the wall for 3 days!!!