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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be angry with the chairperson of the PTA

128 replies

tully67 · 27/02/2015 21:28

at a school disco my son was playing with another boy on the dance floor. Play fighting but not in such a way to annoy any other children. She wen up to them, put her hands on both my son's shoulders and told him to stop it. She said nothing to the other boy. There were older boys running around (it was the Y1-3 disco) from Y6 and Y7 including her son and nothing was said to them. I was standing in the hall at the time alone watching him. I was so mad I left (there was only 10 mins left!!). I didn't say anything to her at the time because I was too cross. I will not see her at the school and was thinking of writing to her as Chair of the PTA or speaking to the Head teacher.

OP posts:
soverylucky · 27/02/2015 21:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChipDip · 27/02/2015 21:33

Yabu, why didn't you confront her at the time. You are making a big issue of nothing.

steff13 · 27/02/2015 21:33

Are you sure she only spoke to your son, or was it a general "stop that" to both of them?

Floggingmolly · 27/02/2015 21:35

Playfighting on the dance floor but not in a way to annoy the other children??? You should have stopped them yourself; not stood and watched.

PtolemysNeedle · 27/02/2015 21:35

Play fighting isn't allowed at my school, and it wouldnt be allowed at an out of school hours PTA disco either.

BarbarianMum · 27/02/2015 21:37

"Let it go" is good advice. She may have been unfair and partial but it is such a trivial matter. Not like she shouted at him, or really told him off.

Being occasionally treated unfairly is an unfortunate part of school life. The flip side is that sometimes your ds will get away with stuff. Save complaints for important things.

APlaceInTheWinter · 27/02/2015 21:37

Don't write to her or speak to the HT. It sounds like quite a lot of the DCs needed supervised. Yes it's unfortunate she picked your DS but he shouldn't have been play fighting and tbf it's probably against school policy as it can quickly get out of hand. I can understand you feel he was unfairly singled out but I can't see how you can raise this without seeming like a parent who doesn't want their child disciplined when they misbehave.

HighwayDragon · 27/02/2015 21:37

Do you have any idea how fucking difficult a school disco is to supervise? The last thing we need is 2 people "play fighting" there is nothing wrong with someone saying stop it to your son, maybe if you'd have been more on the ball she wouldn't have had to.

PatriciaHolm · 27/02/2015 21:38

Deep breath. Step back. Let it go. All a letter will do is label you as bonkers mum whose child Can Do No Wrong.

Littlefish · 27/02/2015 21:39

Next time, stop your child behind inappropriately so that no-one else needs to get involved.

Littlefish · 27/02/2015 21:39

**behaving appropriately

mandy214 · 27/02/2015 21:41

I agree. Play fighting in the middle of a school disco should have been stopped. You should have stopped it. But the PTA woman probably had a million and one other things to do, and was trying her best to organise / manage a successful event. And it probably took quite a lot of her (and others' time).

And she may have got it wrong, maybe should have spoken to both boys but cut her some slack. And let it go.

Original poster
tully67 · 27/02/2015 21:45

Just my son. She is on a power trip though.

OP posts:
Original poster
tully67 · 27/02/2015 21:48

You know Highway Dragon I was only looking for a bit of advice. If you can't do that why reply. Take your anger elsewhere - idiot. To those of you who replied thanks but I'm off. This really isn't the forum for me. will have a chat to my friends. Bye.

OP posts:
YellowTulips · 27/02/2015 21:49

What littlefish said...

Vanimal · 27/02/2015 21:49

YABU. You should have stopped him yourself. It will do him no harm to have been singled out to stop.

Alternatively don't send him to PTA events or organise the next event yourself so you can be in charge of managing the kids.

Littlefish · 27/02/2015 21:50

Why? Because you didn't get the answer you wanted?

PatriciaHolm · 27/02/2015 21:50

Right. Because stopping your son inadvertently walloping a child in his excitement is being on a power trip.

You obviously don't like her. But whinging about her doing something you should have done won't win you any favours.

pippitysqueakity · 27/02/2015 21:51

What HighwayDragon said.

PatriciaHolm · 27/02/2015 21:52

Oh dear. Did we not say "aw Hun" enough?

Fairenuff · 27/02/2015 21:54

Oh, 'bye then... Confused

WineListPlease · 27/02/2015 21:55

There is no place for playfighting at a school disco. That had to be stopped.

roundtable · 27/02/2015 21:57

I think yabu but it's obviously hit a raw nerve with you for whatever reason op.

Sleep on it and try to be objective. Both boys shouldn't have been fighting, it may have not been fairly handled but it doesn't make it right.

Running around tends to happen at school discos although I'd hope it would be nipped in the bid, play fighting not so much.

Hope you feel less cross in the morning.

GokTwo · 27/02/2015 22:01

Sorry op, I think yabu but you have probably left by now. He shouldn't have been play fighting, he was told off by another adult. It's uncomfortable I know but that's life. I feel for the chair of the PTA. Although school discos can be fun they can also be difficult to manage.

ssd · 27/02/2015 22:02

the PTA are full of women on power trips looking to be the big chief and they are usually the ones who spend as little time as possible with their kids but like to be seen as supermum when theres an audience about