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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to say DS can't go on holiday with his friends?

110 replies

turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:18

I'm ready to take this on the head if i really ABU....

DS (18) strolled into the kitchen last night and said he and a group of friends are thinking of going on holiday this summer, after A'levels.

To Magaluf.

Over. My. Dead. Body. I said.

I mean, i know IBU. But ugh. Magaluf?

OP posts:
averylongtimeago · 22/02/2015 13:30

You can't stop him, he is an adult [you know this]. Pack some condoms in his bag and don't read his face book posts while he is away...

KatieScarlettreregged · 22/02/2015 13:31

DS went last year after his AH's.
He lived. And more importantly, so did I.
This year it's inter-railing around the fleshpots of Europe.
All it cost me was sunblock and a fortune in River Fucking Island for clothes.

mommy2ash · 22/02/2015 13:31

i think the only appropriate response you can give is thats nice have fun. if he is paying for it himself then you don't get a say in it

riveravon23 · 22/02/2015 13:31

Is this a joke? It must be, surely. You (or any of us) cannot tell our adult children where to go, or not to go, on holiday. And it would be very unfair of us to even try.

KellyElly · 22/02/2015 13:32

Isn't that the exact age to go somewhere like that? I doubt he's looking for culture, just to get pissed with his mates and have a light. Pretty normal at 18.

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:33

I shouldn't have watched The Inbetweeners movie last night.

OP posts:
SeattleGraceMercyDeath · 22/02/2015 13:33

I went to magaluf twice, once at 17 and once at 19 - we went to the hellhole that was capitalism when I was 18, I'm pretty sure my mother was having conniptions but she wisely kept her counsel. Plenty of drinking was done and staying up until morning sleeping through the sun but no sex, we just weren't that way inclined, you can't stop your son, just make sure he isn't a complete drunken knobber who has no regard for himself or others and I'm sure he'll be alright!

championnibbler · 22/02/2015 13:34

He's 18 so he hardly wants culture.
he wants a sun holiday with his mates where he can have fun, party, drink and meet girls.
that's all boys want at that age.

Mistigri · 22/02/2015 13:34

If he's paying himself (where did he get the money?) this boat has sailed I'm afraid.

Has he been away with friends before? What are the friends like?

MrTumblesBavarianFanbase · 22/02/2015 13:34

Haha!

Of course, as you say, you know YABU as he is 18.

You don't have to help him with the passport etc. though - he's old enough to do whatever he chooses, the flip side of which is he's old enoughnot to need any help at all with the paperwork (but if he does get the passport and flight snd accommodation booked do make sure he has health insurance or that may come back to bite you instead of him!)

Ragwort · 22/02/2015 13:34

Say, that sounds great, I think I'll go too Grin.

SpringBreaker · 22/02/2015 13:34

You could go there too. Keep an eye on him..

(Seriously please don't!!!)

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:35

Whilst i accept that IABU, (i do, i do, honestly), i did happily let him go to Leeds Festival last year. But Magaluf Sad?

OP posts:
MartinJD · 22/02/2015 13:36

You mention why he wouldn't want to go to Paris or some other cultural destination. Let me enlighten you on what the average 18 year old lad wants.

Sex.
Drugs.
Fun with mates.

While all of the above is freely available in Paris, it's probably easier to come by in a resort. Let him go, he'll be fine. Dont make a big deal out of it. You'll probably find he'll end up not finding at least one of the above anyway, and as a result not bother going back again.

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:37

he's had a paper round for years, and works in the paper shop at weekends. Boy has more disposable income than his parents.

OP posts:
TerrifiedMothertobe · 22/02/2015 13:39

He's 18! He'll do Paris when he's 30 and with a girlfriend.
Just buy him a bumper load of durex and tell him to have a great time.

My first girls holiday was when I was 16 to Cornwall 18 Ibiza, great! And I'm a well educated person. We all do it!

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:39

Sex?? He's my PFB. PFB and sex in the same sentence is not what i wanted to ever hear when i held my 3 and a half pounder in my arms 18 years ago.

OP posts:
KatieScarlettreregged · 22/02/2015 13:40

violet
When DD announced his shagaluf plans, I smiled, enquired as to how he was going to pay and told him his passport was out of date. And left him to it, secretly hoping he wouldn't manage to organise himself. He did. I shuddered and said nothing but couldn't let him go away badly dressed so paid for the holiday clothes Smile
No one got a disease or a tattoo (my only conditions).

MrsSchadenfreude · 22/02/2015 13:40

When I was 17, Violet, I went on holiday to Majorca with my parents and took a friend with me. Within days, we had secured ourselves a little evening job in the Bar Top Less. My parents were none the wiser (they thought we were out clubbing), and we came back considerably richer.

mollyonthemove · 22/02/2015 13:41

My eldest dd went to benidorm at 17 with a group of friends. I was mortified, terrified, panicky, all of those things! However, I let her go and she had a great time - the next year they went to aya Napa in Cyprus. It's something they do, he'll be fine, honest! Grin

ilovesooty · 22/02/2015 13:41

I'm sure documentaries about resorts exaggerate what goes on.

The objections and piss taking sound a bit snobby to me.

It's sunny and relatively cheap - not surprised he wants to go.

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:42

the 'bar top less' being exactly what it says??

OP posts:
TyranosaurusBecs · 22/02/2015 13:42

It's just a place.
His behaviour is up to him.
I've been to a Chelsea match.
But I've never in my life shouted a racist comment.
You could sign up to that programme where parents get to spy on their offspring and thus ensure maximum humiliation all round

iklboo · 22/02/2015 13:42

My 60-something parents went to Kavos by mistake last year.

Original poster
turningvioletviolet · 22/02/2015 13:43

look, an AIBU thread where everyone says IABU, and i'm agreeing. this AIBU business is easy.

OP posts:
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