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Original poster

To ask how you deal with cold callers.

186 replies

Missrubyring · 18/02/2015 11:13

Hi, I'm new to MN and just wanted to post something light hearted to start me off so ....

How do you deal with cold callers. Both at the door and on the phone.
I once had one ring who was trying to sell me something, I didn't have time (I never do) and so simply said 'I can't talk right now, I'm driving.' To which he simply said 'okay, sorry, bye.' Not realising the number he had called was a landline. (Not the funniest i know)

So has anyone else got any funny/ creative ways to deal with cold callers, whether they've been put into practice or not??

OP posts:
FireflySerenity · 18/02/2015 22:32

We rarely get the the door but get a few by phone. We have caller ID so only answer known numbers and just let the others ring.

TrollsTrollsEverywhere · 18/02/2015 22:33

Lol, am I the only one wanting to spam the posters who have admitted being coldcallers with spammy PMs. Wink

I'm joking Obvs Confused

MrsBertMacklin · 18/02/2015 22:35

By phone: Screen, screen and screen some more. They're the only people who call my landline, it's turned off most of the time.

In person: before they get a word out: "No thank you, but best of luck with the other houses" Door is closing while I say this, so it's fully shut by the end of that sentence.

MrsBertMacklin · 18/02/2015 22:35

By phone: Screen, screen and screen some more. They're the only people who call my landline, it's turned off most of the time.

In person: before they get a word out: "No thank you, but best of luck with the other houses" Door is closing while I say this, so it's fully shut by the end of that sentence.

TrollsTrollsEverywhere · 18/02/2015 22:37

QOD. If I'm 'forced' to give my phone number or email address I give the number or email of the organisation asking for it. Then they can go spam themself.

If I have to give a real email address I use a disposable email address. They are easy to google. Once I have it verified I change it to the organisation involved.

Sixgeese · 18/02/2015 22:48

I had a new type of cold calling last week, someone with a foreign sounding accent, said that they knew that I was registered with TPS, but somehow there was a mistake on the list and could I give them all my personal details so they could correct it.

I just told them that I didn't believe them and they hung up on me, but I am beginning to believe that TPS doesn't do any good as I get at least 6 calls a week from various call centres.

Smallcogbigwheel · 18/02/2015 22:49

I'm very polite the first time they call, (thank you, I'm not interested, have a good day, goodbye) mildly polite the second, and ask to speak to a supervisor the 3rd. After that all bets are off.

except the Microsoft scammers, sorry but they know they're scamming.

As for door knockers, they can just fuck off. In particular the religious ones, as if I'm going to take on/change my religion on the doorstep???

I live in a town that has both a JD temple (is that right?) and a Mormon temple. So if we get one we'll get the other within days.

I've contacted both asking to be on the no call list with no luck.

I work from home a lot and my desk is visible from the door, so for the JD's I exaggeratily point to the blood donor sticker on the door.

The Mormons, they always seem to be young American lads feel so sorry for them, they always seem a wee bit lost, but damn they are persistent.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 18/02/2015 22:54

Hi OP. Welcome to mumsnet.
I don't answer my door, unless I am expecting someone, and if I don't recognize a phone number or worse if it comes up private under no circumstances will I answer. I will admit I can be easily persuaded, so if I did answer. I probably would end up bring sucked into something and end up getting into debt.

treaclesoda · 18/02/2015 22:58

I despise the whole business of cold calling. It is preying on the weak and vulnerable and people who can't assert themselves and say no. My very elderly parents are tortured with cold callers, they are rung a dozen times a day. They've got caller ID now so no longer answer but they are unsteady on their feet and just getting to the phone to check the callers number is putting them at risk of a fall. They're registered with TPS and it's useless. The very idea of someone ringing people, knowing full well that whoever answers the phone may be vulnerable, but not giving a crap as long as they get a sale, sickens me.

SorchaN · 18/02/2015 23:07

My mother gets the Microsoft calls and she politely tells them she has an iMac (which happens to be true). Usually they just hang up without even saying goodbye.

My father used to try to convert cold callers to his religion.

FirCoatandnoKnickers · 18/02/2015 23:25

Me "Are you trying to sell me something?"
Them "No, no of course not..."
Me "That's a pity, because I was just in the mood to buy something, but I'm afraid the moment has now passed. Goodbye"

WotchOotErAPolis · 19/02/2015 00:08

I used my then 3-yr-old like this [with me prompting him quitely for what to say]:

3YO: hello?
Caller: is your Mum in?
3YO: no she's gone out
Caller: will she be back soon?
3YO: I don't know
Caller: where's she gone?
3YO: I don't know
Caller: is there another grown-up I can talk to?
3YO: No
Caller: are you on your own?
3YO: yes
Caller: how old are you?
3YO: I'm three
...

At this point, I confess I did start giggling so put the phone down!

StrumpersPlunkett · 19/02/2015 00:16

You are all much more creative than I am. I tend to just hang up.
The only ones I have been firm with are the charities to whom I donate money calling repeatedly asking me to up my direct debit. They have been told in no uncertain terms that if they call again I will cancel my current direct debit. I don't have more money to give them.

mindthegap79 · 19/02/2015 00:39

On the morning of my beloved Grandad's funeral, some utter twat called the house to ask if my Grandma was struggling to pay the bills now that she's on her own. Bastards. Luckily my cousin answered and gave them short shrift.

On a brighter note, when a double glazing company called my parents, they made the mistake of asking my dad how many windows his house had. He gleefully said "I don't know - I'll go and count them!" And off he pottered to make a pot of tea Grin

LlamaLove · 19/02/2015 00:46

Did I ask you to call me?

Phone down.

Or after several offending phonecalls from the same idiots

Did I ask you to call me?

No

Then fuck off!

HellKitty · 19/02/2015 00:57

Telephone callers: DP tells them to fuck right off. I just put the phone down.

Doorstep: I tell them we rent (true) but we are hoping to buy this year in which case I'll still say we rent. DP either tells them we already donate (we don't), my DM has died (she hasn't) or he tells them he's just out of prison (not true!). He loves the religious callers though, talks to them for ages about his atheism and his views on all religion. They never come back.

TheCatsFlaps · 19/02/2015 01:52

I answer the phone using either "CP's taxidermy, you snuff 'em, we stuff 'em" or "It's 50 for a handjob, 100 for bareback."

Gets them off the line pronto.

QOD · 19/02/2015 05:27

Perfect trolls
Love it!

LifeOfBriony · 19/02/2015 08:03

I once had a double glazing tele-sales person ask me what my windows were made of. I said "glass". She was genuinely puzzled.

Microsoft spammers - I ask them which computer, pretend to take notes saying I am about to go out but will run the virus checker later. Wastes their time.

I know these callers are only doing their job but it irritates me that they lie and make things up (they "know" you have had an accident, they "know" you are paying unnecessary PPI), so I question them to find out their sources. i haven't given them my number, I haven't asked them to call. I am never rude.

TPS only works for companies who have themselves signed up to say they will abide by the TPS code.

treaclesoda · 19/02/2015 08:12

The TPS website says it is a legal requirement to abide by it, it doesn't say it is voluntary for companies?

Although I know it is powerless over calls from overseas and those that claim to be market research.

muminhants · 19/02/2015 08:24

The really annoying (and also unlawful) ones are the automated messages. Although since I put my mobile no on the TPS they really have stopped so don't give up on the TPS.

If I HAVE to give a phone no on those web forms with compulsory fields I put 01234 567890. Putting the company's own no is a stroke of genius though :)

But I prefer to use email as I can choose when to read an email etc and it doesn't interrupt my dinner! And if it's spam well I either delete it or the spam filter gets it anyway.

SomewhereIBelong · 19/02/2015 08:45

The TPS website says it is a legal requirement to abide by it, it doesn't say it is voluntary for companies

it is a legal requirement - ALL direct marketing companies in the UK (and those abroad with branches in the UK) have to check the register before making UNSOLICITED marketing calls.

Most companies, however, buy their info from "partner companies" who have sold on details of all those who forgot to tick, or did not see, the teeny, tiny box.

LurkingHusband · 19/02/2015 12:05

The TPS website says it is a legal requirement to abide by it

How many companies have been prosecuted - 18 (out of 90)?

for 2014:

Undertakings 51
Prosecutions 18
Enforcement notices 11
Monetary penalties 10

ico.org.uk/action-weve-taken/enforcement/

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 19/02/2015 12:09

"I'm always tempted to say "I'm sorry I don't speak English" in perfect English but I've never dared."

I did this once, to one of those people who try to stop you in the shopping centre, Redheartsandflowers - I can't remember what he was trying to sell me, but his little face was a picture!

FunMitFlags · 19/02/2015 12:19

'I'm sorry you have the wrong number' before they have chance to say anything. I always know it is one of theses calls because there's always a delay before they speak.

If they call back straight away I pick up the phone and hang up straight away with out saying anything.