school nurse letter

[devonshiredumpling]

got a letter this morning rom the schoolnurse service to say that after being weighed my dd has been catergorised as severely overweight. we also got a leaflet saying that her diet could be better (she has at least seven portion of friut and veg) we also need to increase her activity level but since moving to the country we cannot get her out of the garden and off her bike ,she is tall for her age at 122.8 cm and she weighs 29.9kg but you cannot see any fat on her she is five .any help would be good aibu to feel peeved about this (she is five and half)

ok just done a bmi check online and ds (6), is very top.end of healthy. at 24.9 kg. so op your dd needs help. you can't just ignore this!

callooh the op isnt jane. no its not nice to get that letter, I got it. it doesnt mean that you are failing as a parent for not realising. doing nothing about it would be failing as a parent though.
jane was just a conspiracy nutcase from what I could tell

DD starts school this year and I'm dreading it. How about the government let me worry about raising my dc and they worry about running the country.

The country they are running is made up of individuals and families. As another poster pointed out being able to get pregnant and carry a pregnancy to term says nothing about that person's ability to child rear. Not every parent will present their child to the GP or HV for health checks. I work in early years and there are parents that clearly do not know how to care for their children's teeth etc. Would it really be fair to not intervene for fear of being seen as a nanny state.

"I don't like healthcare delivered as a group delivery."

I don't think being weighed an measured is healthcare, but more an evaluation, and I don't have a problem with that. I don't have a problem with vaccinations being delivered en masse either.

When we had the bird flu scare a few years ago they were doing mass vaccinations at our GP surgery on a Saturday morning. There were two doctors in the waiting room delivering injections to patients in front of the queue - no going into private rooms to do it. They just wanted to get through as many as possible in the shortest possible time.

Also mammograms at the hospital are carried out en masse, but each patient is given utmost privacy. It is a bit like a conveyor belt though.

Clearly there are far more instances where group delivery healthcare is inappropriate, but for weighing and vaccinations I don't have a problem with it.

If we want to use the NHS we have to accept the constraints a public health service is subjected to, or we pay to go private.

"I don't like healthcare delivered as a group delivery."

You mean, like vacinnation clinics at the GP surgery, or asthma clinics? As bunbaker said above, much of healthcare is group delivery, it doesn't mean you aren't treated with privacy, dignity and respect, just that it's how you get it in group settings.

**vaccination

older, with respect I wasn't talking aobut what you choose an an adult with regard to your own healthcare. I was responding to your comment that you don't like the idea of your child being given medical care in any way in school.

So I asked the question whether your objection was to medical care being given in school when needed, or whether you would also object to first aid being administered to your child somewhere else - say, at a friends party - if they had an accident and you weren't there.

OP, pretty sure you've got the message now, but just to add my experience. DS was weighed and measured at school a couple of weeks ago as part of a PE lesson. He is 13 1/2, in Y8 at school, and weighs 29.9kg, which is the lower end of healthy for his age and height.

OP - Your DD is very overweight and you need to realise that. She may be tall for her age, but she is also extremely overweight too.

My DD (7yo) is slightly taller than your DD and she weighs 10 Kg less! My DD is on the low end of the ideal weight spectrum, but there is no way she could carry another 50% of her weight and not look obese/overweight.

I'm afraid Jane that by refusing health checks etc then you are already flagging yourself as a family to watch. In neglect cases their are two types of parent, the clever ones who know how to play the system and the obstructive ones who refuse access to their children unless it's at their request. It's not just the 'NHS gestapo' who are watching you but any professional who has contact with your child.
After the tragic cases over the last decade the system is now more robust and supportive of the professionals who are likely to spot neglect or abuse. Big brother is definitely watching you regarding your parenting. Warning bells will sound when you obstruct access to your child. It may seem wrong to you, but children are still dying unnessarily from neglect and abuse in this country they need protection.

If you whole family is inclined to the heavy side(which your name implies) perhaps you could treat it as a challenge to get everyone eating more healthily?
Certainlly neeed to avoid any talk of diets or overeating

Bun- yes agree being weighed is an assessment as part of a health promotion programme. It's just a lot wordier to pin down rather than use one word

E&D also agree that it's common for flu clinics, screening etc. Doesn't mean I have to like it though. I was given my flu jab this year in a room full of other people...answered questions about my health that were part of the standard screen only to be told they are standard and she didn't need to know. I didn't wish to divulge tbh. I don't think I can probably convey how I find healthcare delivery upsetting because it reminds me of my health problems and I'd rather forget them. I know that is just me, irrational etc etc... Feelings are often something we can't control.

Suburban I guess I value things for my child as I value them my own ...in much the same way as I don't wish them to smoke, want them to enjoy exercise etc

I did qualify my post by saying we do comply, do attend, do get vaccinated. Doesn't mean I have to enjoy the experience.

I think we have definitely lost sight of what healthy weights look like. I am constantly told my 4 children are skinny. I find that it is virtually impossible to get trousers for my daughter who is 8, as she has. 21 inch waist but long legs. Brownie and cub trousers have had to be altered etc. yet, there seems to be plenty of choice in plus sizes for children and little in slim fits (I'm looking at you Next!). People constantly say how skinny she is.

Yet, I have just weighed and measured her and at 123 cm and 23 kg, she is on the 29 centile- hardly undernourished. But to any people, she seems underweight. Interestingly she weighed 10lb at birth so was way over the 100 th centile then.

I think we need to remember that after toddlerhood, kids are supposed to be skinny. I was an overweight child, I hated it. I wished there had been more monitoring then.

Sorry Op was side tracked by posters attitude and needed to vent.
I have to agree that your DD is overweight but better to realise this now and be able to do something about it than let it continue. She doesn't need to loose weight but just grow without putting weight on. Seek advice in RL from your GP. A referral to a dietician may help.

Suburban in response to the question of healthcare being delivered in a party or at school because of a specific need...no issues whatsoever as long as it was appropriate.

Gemma's mother administering drugs without checking with me first would seem a little odd....a plaster is fine. In my experience schools tend to do very little because of fear of getting it wrong which I think is probably the right thing. Treat an emergency and call a parent.

OP ds is 6, 130cm and 30kg. He is a string bean. Other DS is and has always been classed as obese and he was 130cm and 30kg at 6.

I knew he would register as obese so I did not give consent for weighing at school (he did have all other screenings) and instead took him to GP with red book.

GP plotted him on new weight chart and compared with red book, ds was following the exact same curve as he did from birth (was 7 lb 3 at birth 36+5 and 10lb 10 by his due date, put on 1lb a week every week).

GP said he was just following his curve and not to give it another thought, could you try the same

cod how can both your DCs have been the same height and weight at the same age and one have been a "string bean" and one "obese."

In my experience schools tend to do very little because of fear of getting it wrong which I think is probably the right thing. Treat an emergency and call a parent.

That's not actually true, older.

The welfare of the child is at the heart of the safeguarding protocol of any school. We would never fail to treat a child in case we got something wrong. We would, however, use a trained first aider to treat a child in need of emergency first aid, call the parent and call an ambulance if necessary.

As some recent posts have shown, some parents think it's very unreasonable to have to come to school quickly in an emergency. Some just aren't able to and have not provided an alternative emergency contact to the school. Some parents forget to tell us their mobile number has changed or leave it on silent.

So it's imperative that schools have procedures in place to respond quickly and appropriately to an emergency.

codandchips I think you are deluding yourself.Noth your DS s at 6 to be 30kg and 130 cm are overweight. They are on teh 92nd centile for BMI.

Because he is on the same centile for weight as he was when he was born doesn't make his BMI now ok

It is much much easier to get their weight under control when they are at an age where they are naturally very active and you have absolute control over their diets, than when they start secondary school.

Healthcare delivered as group therapy

I'm guessing a healthcare model based on your preferences would be very costly, requiring a significant hike in taxes, a hike that not many would be happy with seeing how they have different preferences. As an adult you don't have to attend screenings for yourself but preventing your children from accessing services that are known to improve outcomes is not acceptable.

cod my ds is six and is at the very top end of healthy weight at 24.9 kg. to be 30 is overweight!