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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this girl on the bus was beyond rude and selfish

87 replies

Behindthepaintedgarden · 10/02/2015 14:10

I was on the bus this morning going to work. The bus was crowded with people standing. I stood up to give a heavily pregnant woman my seat and a girl of about 20 plonked herself down immediately. I said 'sorry, I was actually standing up so that lady could sit down' pointing to the pregnant woman. The girl just shrugged her shoulders and remained sitting. Short of making a scene there was nothing I could do. Someone else stood up for the pregnant woman and I remained standing while madam made herself comfy in the seat that had been mine.

AIBU to still want to strangle the selfish brat?

OP posts:
gotredonyou · 10/02/2015 14:12

YANBU!

SunnyBaudelaire · 10/02/2015 14:14

YANBU how rude you should have made a scene

smallandimperfectlyformed · 10/02/2015 14:15

Something similar happened to me years ago, I was on a crowded bus sitting down & when an elderly man got on the bus I stood up and loudly said 'here's a seat for you' when a middle aged woman practically ran and jumped into the seat! We were all speechless. YANBU, I hate it when people do that!

sebsmummy1 · 10/02/2015 14:15

Bloody hell lol that's audacious!!

solitarywalker · 10/02/2015 14:15

YANBU! What was she thinking?! How can people be like that?! Shock

bettyboop1970 · 10/02/2015 14:18

YANBU the selfish brat!

MrsRayOfSunshine · 10/02/2015 14:18

Yanbu! I would of made a scene! How can someone do that and not feel guilty!

CheeseandGherkins · 10/02/2015 14:20

Yanbu. I'd have made a scene too and if she had refused to move, got my phone out and threaten to take a photo of her and splash it all over social media along with what she'd done.

ProudAS · 10/02/2015 14:21

How do you know that she didn't have a back problem etc which would have made it hard to stand? An explanation might have been in order though.

YesIDidMeanToBeSoRudeActually · 10/02/2015 14:22

Could she have an invisible disability? She may well just be a selfish arse but I have a disability which sometimes is not apparent and I get looks while seated in priority seat.

Although a full train was happy to sit and watch me trying to balance on crutches the other week Hmm

SergeantJarhead · 10/02/2015 14:23

YANBU, and well done for not making a scene. I would have flipped my shit.

angelos02 · 10/02/2015 14:23

YANBU. That is fucking outrageous. Hoping karma worked it's magic on her for the rest of the day her life

rinabean · 10/02/2015 14:23

Yes. Everyone got what they wanted and everything was fine. And you don't know why she wanted the seat.

YANBU to be annoyed but it happened hours ago and it was all fine within minutes and no-one was hurt. If it was simply that she was being a cow, don't let it get to you

BananaramaLlama · 10/02/2015 14:26

That happened to me when I was pg with twins - me and the lady who had stood up to give me a seat just rolled our eyes at each other. Thankfully wasn't going far.

angelos02 · 10/02/2015 14:27

Everyone got what they wanted and everything was fine

Eh? How do you come to that conclusion? Someone gave their seat up in good faith and someone it wasn't intended for nicked it. If she had a disability she should have said so. Given the brass-necked way she shrugged her shoulders I don't believe for a second she did

TheWitTank · 10/02/2015 14:28

I would have explained really loudly to the pregnant women (so the entire bus could hear) that you were sorry the seat you had offered was taken by somebody selfish and rude. Then stood really uncomfortably close to seat grabber for the rest of the journey (arse in the face job). But I have moments of spectacular immaturity so don't listen to me Grin.

HairyOrk · 10/02/2015 14:32

Oh god, here we go. Lots of "you don't know what its like to be her" "she could have a hidden disability" when chances are she's just a rude cow.

Surely if you have a hidden disability in this situation you'd just say so?

HairyOrk · 10/02/2015 14:32

Oh god, here we go. Lots of "you don't know what its like to be her" "she could have a hidden disability" when chances are she's just a rude cow.

Surely if you have a hidden disability in this situation you'd just say so?

ProudAS · 10/02/2015 14:34

How can we judge the girl without knowing her reasons. She may not have even known that the seat was being offered to another passenger.

It would have been inadvisable for me to stand on a moving bus at her age due to back problems and less than perfect balance but that didn't stop me from moving quickly.

angelos02 · 10/02/2015 14:36

I think I'd have to be, for want of a better phrase, 'very disabled' to nick a seat from someone that wasn't intended for me.

YouTheCat · 10/02/2015 14:36

The op made it clear to her who the seat was being offered to.

If she needed the seat she could have said so without having to go into details and I'm pretty sure that would have been fine.

The nonchalant shrug suggests she was just an selfish cow.

ProudAS · 10/02/2015 14:37

Why should she have to tell the whole bus if she has a hidden disability or injury??? Perhaps she did so previously and got ridiculed for it.

Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 10/02/2015 14:39

Absolutely YNBU. It was very good of you to give your seat but sadly not everyone us as nice and thoughtful as you not everyone cares about pregnant women and do I dare say as harsh as this seems. There's no law saying they have to, some people are selfish and dont give 2 hoots about other people. You'll never change people like that. It's the way the workd is, but it's public transport so some would say neither is she, andnoone is going to move because you tell them to!. e. How do you know she didn't have underlaying disability issues. It just seems these days if your not pregnant you've got no rights

YouTheCat · 10/02/2015 14:39

All she needed to say was 'I'm sorry, I really need this seat' - no need for details. She might not have had a hidden disability but she might have been feeling faint or something. Her lack of acknowledgement and apology is what makes her rude.

TheWitTank · 10/02/2015 14:39

Oh come on. Clearly she would have offered some explanation when challenged if she did have a valid reason for needing the seat rather than just shrugging her shoulders. I'm not saying (before I get piled on) that she should have to give a full diagnosis of her theoretical disability, but most people would at least say 'I really need the seat because I find it hard to stand' or something along those lines. I would say the vast majority of people don't like looking a complete cunt.