to be fed up of living in a deprived neighbourhood?

[fluffymouse]

We moved neighbourhoods in London to up size. Quite simply we could only afford a place big enough for us as a family in London in a dodgy neighbourhood. By any conventional marker the area is very deprived. It has a rather notorious reputation too, and has meant some people have been reluctant to visit us.

I have tried being positive about the area (it is on the up, like all areas of London that are not already up!). I am starting to think it would be nice to just move out to a nice village now.

Pros of our area:
Good community feel
Crime rate acceptable by London standards
Feels safe for the most part
Diverse neighbourhood - good ethnic foods

Cons:
Drug dealing neighbours who have been verbally abusive and threatening
Antisocial behaviour issues
Very few of the parents at dd's preschool speak English - limiting opportunities for play dates
Local schools - most do well considering, but children starting with attainment well below average, high turnover of pupils, and lots of pupils at early stage of English language acquisition
Very poor provision for children despite there being lots of children in the area - put simply no one bothers to provide as it wouldn't be taken up for the most part. No ballet, gym etc. Even the children centres offer very little.

WIBU to move us all out to a beautiful village up north where we can get a 4 bed house for the price of a bedsit here?

Lol at Manchester being the cultural equivalent of london. My sister lives in Manchester, I go there lots. There's no comparison. Even she agrees, despite her love for Manchester!

Shhh....I prefer Leeds too....

Strange but I am rarely gripped by the urge to go to a museum.

How many museums and theatres do you need though. My city has a good number of museums- not as many as London, but I have only visited half of them. Same with theatres.

Some folks just don't want to have to be witness to the deprivation which exists in the UK or to be part of mixed communities

What a strange comment. Some people just feel scared and want to feel safe in their home. Living cheek by jowl with aggressive drug dealer is something no one should have to put up with, nor all the effluence coming from that .

That's the point bigblue. For your average family and average to good wage earning parents there is everything you could want in Manchester (and other big cities). Between school run and kids activities, in reality most people do not go out experiencing cultural stuff every night and a different museium every week. There's actually a lot more than people realise too like obscure tiny museums and galleries etc

How many museums and theatres do you need though

With small children in winter I need lots and lots and lots and they are free and fun. I cannot think of a single brilliant museum that's free, near where I live. I have to travel to London which thankfully isn't far.

I have never been to a museum in the uk that compared to the ones in London. That would keep us amused for x years to keep re visiting.

I'm amazed at all these people paying London prices for houses still going to their "world class opera" and array of Michelin star restaurants.Do people with kids a)seriously want to do all that any day of the week and b) have the money for it?

We have museums, theatres and good restaurants even in the backwaters of Exeter but frankly I rarely get near any of them.You could open a Michelin star restaurant at the bottom of my road and it would make buggar all difference to me.

Hate to burst your bubble but I've taken my kids to all the London museums and none have been as good as RAMM in Exeter which is also free.

And what other museums are there because you wouldn't want to keep going to RAAM all the time?

Kids or no kids, it's true that most Londoners don't do these cultural activities (some of which, as I say, are only here and are the best in the world) every night or even most nights. But most of us do them sometimes with none or little faffing involved.

Well my small child has spent most of this winter playing in the cul de sac outside our house with his little mates and their skateboards. When the weather is horrid they are in and out of each other's houses on an informal basis, legging and minecrafting.

You don't get that in London, kids are supervised to within an inch of their lives.

Legoing even.

Ha,ha,ha a) my dc would be board shatless going to museums every fecking weekend but if they desired we have St Nicholas Priory Museum,Underground Passages within the city itself.Now if you were to extend out of the city on the same radius as London you'd find more- Escot,Killerton,Knightshayes,Bicton.....Then we have countless other attractions,beaches,moors,woods,farms,tourist attractions galore.......It's a kids paradise down here.Surrey sucks in comparison,we get bored shatless when staying with the inlaws.

I live in a deprived area too. I have great neighbours, I have shops on my Dior step open 24/7, I'm five minutes away from the tube and feel safe walking around on my own. I ignore the police helicopters that seem to be flying over head every few minutes. I was aghast to notice a Costa Coffee being built at the top of my street. About five people have said it will "bring the area up" what's that then?

Oh and when the desire to spend shed loads of money to see "world class" takes us we can get on a train and go up to London to see a show.Many do with very little faff.

Well my small child has spent most of this winter playing in the cul de sac outside our house with his little mates and their skateboards. When the weather is horrid they are in and out of each other's houses on an informal basis, legging and minecrafting.

You don't get that in London, kids are supervised to within an inch of their lives.

Getting back to the topic at hand. My 12.5 year old has woefully little independence outside of our house in our very nice street in Fulham because our neighbors are drug dealers (I really don't have an issue with this, specifically) and they have menacing addicts coming in and out of their house at all hours (this is the problem).

I've also been attacked by 2 pit-bull type dogs who were housed in a one-bedroom HA flat maybe 20 doors away from our own house - as it turned out many neighbors had complained about the dog before this episode but the HA deemed it a breach of the owner's privacy rights to intervene.

I would really love to be a laid-back parent, but how could I be?

Don't leave London. You will miss it and won't be able to move back.

I suppose a lot of it depends on how much you value being able to skateboard around a cul de sac.

I have had a number of friends move out of London when their DCs are approaching secondary school age who are now having major regrets. Some have moved to towns but a couple have gone for the whole rural idyll thing but are realising that teenagers don't want woodland walks or den building or tree climbing. They want cinemas and swimming pools and skateboard parks and shops. And most of all, they don't want to be dependent on their parents to drive them everywhere at a time when they're trying to become independent.
Kids in London can go anywhere on the bus for free and get very reduced tube fares.
DD 12 went to Portobello rd market on Saturday.
She spent a couple of hours in Trafalgar Square watching a Mexican rock band doing a gig.
On Sunday, she went to 'Extreme Aqua Splash' which is a kind of massive inflatable obstacle course at the Olympic swimming pool. Then her and her friends wandered around Westfield for a couple of hours.
She did all this without having to be driven and without me having to fork out a penny for bus fares.
I doubt she'd prefer skating round a cul de sac.