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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

people that look at other peoples homes / pension etc with jealousy are abhorrent

101 replies

boomingrosemary2 · 30/01/2015 13:16

Does anyone else get this allot? It seems many (younger) people have little interest in earning something and building a career, they just want everything handed to them on a plate

OP posts:
GraysAnalogy · 30/01/2015 14:09

Ah yes us younger people are lazy envious harridans.

I didn't work for less than minimum wage and then put myself through university to get a good career. Oh no.

I didn't pay my dad's mortgage when he fell on hard times, oh no, I just looked on seething that older people have managed to buy lovely houses and have these fabulous pensions

ilovechristmas1 · 30/01/2015 14:41

ha ha,yes if you mean teenagers

no if you mean those in there 20's

morethanpotatoprints · 30/01/2015 14:49

Ha Ha definitely a journo, can't even spell a lot.

RosyAuroch · 30/01/2015 15:47

YABU. I think you are mistaking despair for laziness.

And the younger people are reasonable for despairing. It is so much harder for people today to get a secure job, get secure housing, save for any kind of future and get access to any kind of pension that isn't wholly dependent on the vagaries of the stock market.

PatriciaHolm · 30/01/2015 16:08

What, like you want free cake handed to you on a plate?

(See OPs only other thread...)

DreamingOfAHotDrink · 30/01/2015 16:13

What has been jealous of a pensioner got to do with being young, middle aged people could be jealous too. Anyone could be jealous of anyone. Maybe the older people are jealous of those younger than them, as they have something they can never obtain again, youth!

DreamingOfAHotDrink · 30/01/2015 16:13

*being

adora1985 · 30/01/2015 16:41

What a silly thread. No, 'younger people' don't want everything handed to them, and are willing to put in the effort to get where they want to be. What is frustrating is that the playing field has changed dramatically in the last few decades, and it doesn't mean the same to be a 20-something of this generation as it did a few generations ago.
There may well be a few that expect things which haven't been earned to be handed to them, but they are really the exception rather than the rule.
The job market is extremely difficult to navigate now, a degree no longer equals a high flying, well paid career. Living costs are rising quicker than wages are, which means that a lot of people that would have been comfortable only a few years ago are now struggling massively. And of course house prices have risen massively and very rapidly.
But of course you know this already. It's not jealousy, possibly a bit of despair like a PP said, as the future isn't secure for my generation of 20-something's, the future feels very unstable at the moment.

Toughasoldboots · 30/01/2015 16:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Damnautocorrect · 30/01/2015 17:09

I bought my first home 17 years ago, It was an abusive (financially, physically, emotionally and sexually) relationship. I'm lucky, I got out. But I lost everything. Now I stand no chance of buying a home instead of renting a house. As pp say, the goal posts have changes. At 3x lending rates on an 'average' house near me you need to earn way over 100k. That's not very 'average'

Didactylos · 30/01/2015 17:30

Hmm YABU
I dont want it all on a crummy fucking plate

I expect it to presented to me on a perfectly polished massive silver salver by a well trained butler

Coumarin · 30/01/2015 19:06

Behold the mighty Alot.

people that look at other peoples homes / pension etc with jealousy are abhorrent
MadisonMontgomery · 30/01/2015 20:59

My grandfather died last year. When he worked he did a job that would earn you roughly 40k a year now. So pretty decent, but not super rich or anything. My grandmother never worked, so they only had his wages coming in. They bought their 4 bed detached house on a nice road when they were early 30's with 2 kids, and my grandfather retired at 50, and they had a comfortable life - house decorated & modernised every few years, new car every 3 years, holidays abroad etc. When he died he had savings of nearly 300k in the bank. I cannot imagine any family now being able to live that lifestyle.

JennyBlueWren · 30/01/2015 21:13

We have a lovely house with a mortgage we can afford but I do still have house/garden envy. I find myself looking at other people's houses as I go past on the bus and thinking how much they fit my ideal.
I think part of the problem is that I always had an image of what my future home would be like -but that's not what I've ended up with. My house is lovely inside but outside looks awful (a grey block) and has a lot less garden than I ever wanted. But (as MIL pointed out) the garden is actually as much as I actually have time to manage and a lot can be done with it.

Frozenchipsareawful · 30/01/2015 21:19

Sheba, well said. Sick of seeing the Beckham, Gallagher, fox types in the news. Its not what you know..

dhdjdbrjrkbr · 31/01/2015 11:57

Depends if the pension is solvent and funded properly. Most aren't and are just pyramid schemes that fuck the people at the bottom. This includes the state pension.

TedAndLola · 31/01/2015 15:30

It's odd as I don't think it's jealousy more the fact that my generation have been utterly screwed over.

Yup. Am I bitter that I have a far better paid job than most people my age, but can't afford to buy a house and instead am paying a BTL landlord's mortgage? Fuck yes, I am. I'm not jealous of him, I'm angry.

drudgetrudy · 31/01/2015 15:47

I dislike these generalisations about "younger people" and "older people".
I think buying a house etc is definitely more difficult than it was in the 70s.
Graduate unemployment and youth unemployment are a terrible thing-and before you say its gone down look at the zero hours or min wage jobs that are replacing this.
I guess though that very few over 65s have private pensions of 110k.

I earned about £30,000 working for the NHS and my private pension is 8k (plus state pension). Some part-time work when kids were young.
I am not at all surprised that many younger people are unhappy-but the real inequality is between the haves and have-nots across the age range.
BTW with no mortgage now I am def not complaining about my standard of living.
I would encourage people to look wider at the inequality in society rather than look with envy at other people's semis.

JohnFarleysRuskin · 31/01/2015 16:46

Abhorrent?! Really?

Oh, has the op disappeared?

123upthere · 31/01/2015 16:48

Strange question...

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 31/01/2015 16:50

Murderers.and child abusers are abhorrent , not people who get a bit jealous of someone's pension.

squizita · 31/01/2015 16:52

As Fanjo says, abhorrent is quite extreme.
Covetous or annoying maybe.

squizita · 31/01/2015 16:57

Before I had my baby I worked 60 hr a week for my "plate". And some dodgy dealings fecked over my pension after years of paying in. Angry It's not nice feeling "the man" screwed you over when you just worked hard and paid your way - to the extent you can hardly afford rent/mortgage on an honest wage.

My plate was taken, cracked and chipped up and handed back with less on it.

LineRunner · 31/01/2015 17:01

A bit goady, OP?

AmIthatHot · 31/01/2015 17:11

I'm abhorrent.

I look with jealousy at other people's houses and wish that I had another income and wish that DD's needs didn't limit my ability to do a job I really would like, so I could afford a nice house

Yup, totally abhorrent, me