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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have refused this delivery after previously agreeing to take it in for a neighbour?

133 replies

LipsMovingStillTalking · 24/01/2015 15:43

I have namechanged as my neighbour may be on here.

On Saturday afternoon last week, my neighbour came round and said they were going on holiday on Monday and could I possibly take in a delivery for them which would be arriving Tuesday. I agreed happily, as I have done so before for them and they knew it wasn't one of my working days.

However, come Tuesday, the delivery arrives and its a bloody bed and mattress! At no point did my neighbour mention that this is what was arriving. Neither did I ask, but then other parcels I have taken in for them have been things like clothes and shoes etc, so I wasn't expecting anything out of the ordinary.

I simply do not have the room to store a bed and mattress for four days so I had to refuse the delivery. The two people delivering weren't happy as they had been told I would take the bed in but they obviously had no choice but to take it back. I just shut the door and went back inside stunned that my neighbour hadn't mentioned it was such a large item. The cynic in me wonders if that was exactly why they didn't say anything as surely not many people would be able to take in something like that!

This morning, my neighbour came back from holiday and popped round, clearly quite pissed off at what I had done. I made it clear that had they left me a key I would've been happy to let the delivery people in and lock up again afterwards but that I couldn't keep the bed in my house. She said she assumed I realised what the item was as she had been chatting to me outside when their existing bed had been taken away. When my neighbour left, it was quite obvious I was in the doghouse.

I know I wouldn't have been unreasonable to refuse a delivery that my neighbour hadn't asked me to take in, or even to have refused to accept it when she asked, but AIBU to have refused one that she had asked me to take in on the grounds that it was so large?

OP posts:
quietbatperson · 24/01/2015 20:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Aeroflotgirl · 25/01/2015 10:43

How is rude and entitled neighbour today op? Why should op ask about the delivery, it is up to the neighbour to give the correct information, she should have had the courtesy of informing op of what the delivery was, and to leave a key to her property or garage so that they item could be stored. If it was ok for op to do that! Op had every right to decline the delivery, she had no idea it was a double bed with matress, and thought it was something a lot smaller. She had nowhere to store it without it blocking her enterance and exit in her property. the neighbour has no right to be pissed off, serves her right for not giving op the full details and assuming op will keep a double bed in her property for 4 days. Serves her right, she will no have to go to Argos or Tesco and get herself an airbed.

Aeroflotgirl · 25/01/2015 10:48

No miscomunication here, op wasen't given any information on the delivery, she is not a mind reader. Neighbour knew op would say no if she told her what the delivery was, so thought she would try it on.

Staywithme · 25/01/2015 11:23

Love the fact she trusts you enough to take her parcels, but with a key to her house? She's a bloody piss taker. It's not as if you've lost a friend OP and I bet she'll be back soon enough expecting you to take in her parcels again. I wouldn't bother after that episode. You were doing her a favour you don't bloody work for her!

Jill2015 · 25/01/2015 11:39

Why arrange delivery of furniture when you are going to be away on holidays? YANBU.
Just picturing it here, a double bed and mattress stashed in the hall would mean some kind of rope system having to be installed in order to access the stairs. Or something. It would probably also end up taking off some of your paint, or doing damage getting it in and out.
No reasonable person expects another to take in a double bed and mattress. They should have left you a key. That would be reasonable.
That would end my parcel taking in, for them, anyway.

IDontDoIroning · 25/01/2015 11:45

Who in their right minds gets a bed (a BED !!!) delivered when they aren't at home and aren't likely to be back for days.

If she's been in your house and knows how much space you have and therefore knows you don't have the space to keep a double bed and matress for 4 days without seriously affecting your ability to safely move round your home, then she was BVU to expect you to do this.

Possibly if she doesn't know the layout of your home or how much room you have then she is still BU to expect you to keep such a large item for several days.

She was silly to dispose of old bed without having new one as there may have been other delivery issues delays etc that meant she was without a bed to sleep in. Or they should have had a contingency plan in case of non delivery such as sofa or a blow up mattress

OddFodd · 25/01/2015 12:08

You don't ask your neighbour to store a double bed for you for more than a couple of hours. You just don't.

She knew you'd have said no if she'd told you what it was. Beyond cheeky

skinoncustard · 25/01/2015 12:41

A bed is not a parcel !!!!!!!!!!!!!

YADNU

Viviennemary · 25/01/2015 13:25

YANBU. Your neighbour tried to pull a fast one on you and good for you for refusing. She should have left a key. Totally out of order completely A bed isn't a parcel.

clam · 25/01/2015 13:27

Have you seen her again? Is she still being arsey?

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 25/01/2015 14:17

What a stupid woman!!

AliceLidl · 25/01/2015 14:41

Nobody in their reasonable mind could justify calling a bed and mattress "a parcel" but it sounds like the neighbour carefully side-stepped that one by calling it a delivery.

I doubt it would cross anybody's mind to expect that delivery to be one of the biggest pieces of furniture most people have in their houses though.

OP you are not being unreasonable. Depending on the size of the bed, mattress and packaging, I possibly might be able to take in a bed and mattress for my neighbour, as we can bypass our hallway and go through another room to get to the rest of the house if need be. As long as it wasn't too bulky and both could fit side by side.

But I don't think I'd want to. Bad enough having things delivered that belong to us. We've had a beautiful wooden door frame scratched badly and bits of paint and plaster chipped off walls during deliveries, and our last sofa delivery ended up breaking a light fitting.

Plus I'd be worried I'd be blamed by the neighbour or the company for any damage to the bed.

And that's without the inconvenience of having massive boxes blocking the hall.

Your neighbour reminds me of the one who once asked us to feed her cat and her fish for a week while they were on holiday, without telling me that her house was infested with cat fleas.

It was so bad that I went in wearing a white shirt, came home after five minutes at the most, and my husband said "what are all those flies?" and it was cat fleas all over my shirt Shock

When I told her about them on her return she said "I know! It's awful isn't it. We couldn't walk across the floor barefoot without having at least twenty bites on our feet!"

I had to get our house sprayed and our dog treated to get rid of the ones I'd brought back, and DH likes to take the piss and say the dog caught fleas of me Angry

She wasn't the least bit bothered, and didn't see why I thought she ought to have warned me. She also had a family member take in her dog while she was on holiday so they had to treat their own house and pets as well.

Does your neighbour have a cat OP?

Aeroflotgirl · 25/01/2015 14:52

Shock Alice how awful.

Quitethewoodsman · 25/01/2015 21:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

sneepy · 25/01/2015 22:23

We had a neighbour who had all kinds of things delivered because he knew I'd be home and I took them in like a mug. Sometimes he'd leave huge boxes in our house for days. Then he ordered a bike. A really, really expensive bicycle. I told the delivery guy no as I didn't want to be responsible for 3k worth of equipment (had to argue with delivery guy who was trying to shove it through my door) and he didn't speak to us from then until the day he moved out. Twat.

CharityD · 26/01/2015 11:13

Result sneepy! At least you were rid of him taking you for granted then. Ugh, I hate people who only talk to you when you are of use to them.

PasstheDaimbars · 26/01/2015 13:04

FFS.............

I felt bad when I had to ask the neighbour if they'd mind accepting delivery of a phone for OH. Asked with the get out clause of I totally understood if they said they didn't want to as it would be tying them down.

Before anyone asks OH didn't go ask as he wasn't in the country at the time and was going to be back from trip 1 for 12 hours before going on trip 2. He got both barrels for assuming that I could rearrange my working from home days to suit him.

And when they said yes, and he returned he was sent around with a bottle of wine as a thank you. They are very good and quite often take in stuff for us, pisses me off (not with them) as I try to arrange deliveries for when I am at home, and then they deliver the day before/after. . . Grrr.

I would hate to think that they felt we were taking the piss at all.

But a fricking bed!!!

I mean fair enough asking you to sit in her house for the delivery, I've done that for friends before.

But accepting a bed!!!

wishmiplass · 26/01/2015 13:18

YANBU for not taking the bed.

YABU to for ncing thinking this would give you some sort of anonymity! x

Aeroflotgirl · 26/01/2015 13:39

wishmiplass, are you the neighbour Hmm

wishmiplass · 26/01/2015 13:43

No Aero Just thought it mildly amusing given that the issue is fairly specific Smile x

Aeroflotgirl · 26/01/2015 13:46

Oh right, yes I was thinking that, lets hope neighbour is not a Mumsnetter, mabey op doesn't care if she sees it Smile

wishmiplass · 26/01/2015 13:58

I hope neighbour is and does! She should be going round to OP's house with a huge Flowers. Cheeky moo.

yellowdinosauragain · 26/01/2015 14:04

While the post is pretty specific and I'm sure the neighbour would recognise herself if she read it, name changing does at least mean she couldn't advance search the op and read everything else she's previously written...

acatcalledjohn · 26/01/2015 14:13

The neighbour should read this as they may even realise that they were out of order.

And if they read it and still don't realise the error of their ways, then they are just not very bright fucktards

Look at sneepy's neighbour. Expecting deliveries to be accepted without even asking beforehand. Entitled twat. It must have been bliss when you pissed him off like that Grin

Chilicosrenegade · 26/01/2015 14:13

Fuck them, idiots.

I hope neighbour is here.

Fuckwits