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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have refused this delivery after previously agreeing to take it in for a neighbour?

133 replies

LipsMovingStillTalking · 24/01/2015 15:43

I have namechanged as my neighbour may be on here.

On Saturday afternoon last week, my neighbour came round and said they were going on holiday on Monday and could I possibly take in a delivery for them which would be arriving Tuesday. I agreed happily, as I have done so before for them and they knew it wasn't one of my working days.

However, come Tuesday, the delivery arrives and its a bloody bed and mattress! At no point did my neighbour mention that this is what was arriving. Neither did I ask, but then other parcels I have taken in for them have been things like clothes and shoes etc, so I wasn't expecting anything out of the ordinary.

I simply do not have the room to store a bed and mattress for four days so I had to refuse the delivery. The two people delivering weren't happy as they had been told I would take the bed in but they obviously had no choice but to take it back. I just shut the door and went back inside stunned that my neighbour hadn't mentioned it was such a large item. The cynic in me wonders if that was exactly why they didn't say anything as surely not many people would be able to take in something like that!

This morning, my neighbour came back from holiday and popped round, clearly quite pissed off at what I had done. I made it clear that had they left me a key I would've been happy to let the delivery people in and lock up again afterwards but that I couldn't keep the bed in my house. She said she assumed I realised what the item was as she had been chatting to me outside when their existing bed had been taken away. When my neighbour left, it was quite obvious I was in the doghouse.

I know I wouldn't have been unreasonable to refuse a delivery that my neighbour hadn't asked me to take in, or even to have refused to accept it when she asked, but AIBU to have refused one that she had asked me to take in on the grounds that it was so large?

OP posts:
Aeroflotgirl · 24/01/2015 16:51

My neighbours are absolutely lovely, but I could never pull a stunt on them like that, they would not be lovely after that I am sure.

BitOutOfPractice · 24/01/2015 16:51

I had a knock at the door a while back. There's a delivery man asking if I'd take in a delivery for across the road. I agree (done it many times before) so he goes back to his van and comes back with his mate carrying a bath!!! I was "WTF!" but took it in anyway. This was followed by a toilet, sink and shower tray! Shock

IN fairness to my neighbour, she knocked about half an hour later, absolutely mortified at what had happened (her husband is a plumber and had ordered it for a job but not mentioned to her that she needed to wait in) and we had a good laugh about it. It was out of my way in less than an hour so it wasn't a problem.

In your case OP, YANBU if you had no room and it was going to be for 4 days. Your neighbour has a nerve I think

Skatingfastonthinice · 24/01/2015 16:52

Made me think of this passage from one of Gerald Durrell's books.

'one week-end recently, when all alone in the house, she was treated to the sudden arrival of a series of crates containing two pelicans, a scarlet ibis, a vulture, and eight monkeys. A lesser mortal might have quailed at such a contingency, but not Mother. On Monday morning I found her in the garage being pursued round and round by an irate pelican which she was trying to feed with sardines from a tin.
“I'm glad you've come, dear,” she panted; “this pelican is a little difficult to handle.”
When I asked her how she knew the animals belonged to me, she replied: “Well, of course I knew they were yours, dear; who else would send pelicans to me?” '

But at least he was family.

Koalafications · 24/01/2015 16:52

I would have taken it in, and then seethed about it for 4 days. But that's because I would have hated the confrontation with the neighbour and I do have the space to store it.

OP, YANBU.

AlistairSim · 24/01/2015 16:53

Where the blooming heck did she think you would be able to store it? Do you live in a many reception-roomed house?
Weird.
YANBU.

clam · 24/01/2015 16:54

Even if you live in a large house, you're unlikely to want/be able to store such a large item for 4 days.

ConcreteElephant · 24/01/2015 16:55

Soontobesix, but it's a bed! And mattress! You're extremely kind and/or live in a palace.

We've got a decent sized house but frankly, the only space we have to store a bed is in a bedroom, where the bed should be, and all my bedrooms already have beds in them, funnily enough. I could fit it in the garden...

Our lovely lovely elderly neighbours did in fact take in a single bed and mattress delivery for us just over a year ago. We were expecting DD's new bed to be delivered after Christmas, courier would call etc. all well and good. As we came back to our house one evening before Christmas our neighbour caught us and asked if we'd like to pop over to collect our delivery - 'sure' says DH, 'thanks' and went over. He came back two minutes later saying, 'it's a bloody bed! They've delivered the bed!' Our poor neighbours could barely get out their front door. We were immensely grateful and very apologetic for the inconvenience.

A double bed, for 4 days? Unexpected? No way.

DoJo · 24/01/2015 16:55

Had this happened to me, I too would've been a bit WTF but would've worked around the monsteous inconvenience in my hall it for a few days and then had THAT conversation

But you clearly have a hall that will accommodate a bed. In most of the houses I have lived in, an additional bed would have needed moving every time you wanted to get into the kitchen or up the stairs, and even in my current (much more spacious) house, it would have blocked access to the much-needed downstairs loo, the front door, or the stairs, and with a toddler around, I would also have been worried about him dislodging it and it squashing him flat!

TeaAndALemonTart · 24/01/2015 16:55

What did they sleep on on Saturday night and Sunday night then?

Did you ask her that?

Quitethewoodsman · 24/01/2015 16:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HemlockStarglimmer · 24/01/2015 16:56

I'm very happy to take deliveries in for my neighbours but I would balk at a bed and mattress too. You're stronger than I am though, feeble me would have put up with it and then I'd have had my husband telling me I'm an idiot too. And he'd be right.

I took in a loo that a driver brought on the wrong day for my lovely next door neighbour. The driver was so dopey I was worried he might never come back with it. But at least it fitted in the shed.

Hamper · 24/01/2015 16:57

Madness!

HouseAtreides · 24/01/2015 16:57

If this were me I would have literally nowhere to store a bloody double bed and mattress. Nowhere. Unless it went in the bath, on top of our bed, in the garden...
YADNBU. She KNEW you would say no and was counting on you being too flummoxed to refuse it and too nice to kick up a fuss.

clam · 24/01/2015 16:58

Hmm, so they had the old bed taken away before the new one arrived? Presumably because they knew they wouldn't have room to store both? Yet they thought you'd be OK with having a f-off double bed in your hall for a few days.

Roussette · 24/01/2015 17:00

My hall isn't tiny but it would have blocked off either the lounge or the downstairs loo and garage. If it were me and I knew her mobile number, I would probably have rung her whilst keeping the delivery guy waiting and said "What the hell do you expect me to do with this bed?!"

Does NDN have a garage, if so, couldn't it have gone in there? They must have known you would have difficulty with this and might have said no, so they were just taking advantage and hoping you wouldn't.

BitOutOfPractice · 24/01/2015 17:00

That's a point clam - most companies will take your old mattress away when they deliver for a small fee

Eastwickwitch · 24/01/2015 17:01

Ridiculous, who an earth arranges to have a bed delivered when they're on holiday?
YANBU, unless you took it in, put sheets on and slept in it Grin

expatinscotland · 24/01/2015 17:03

You are legally responsible for items you take in for neighbours. If her bed had been damaged, you can bet someone so cheeky would have pinned you for the money.

FreeWee · 24/01/2015 17:04

I was going to ask my neighbours to take delivery of a fridge freezer for me as the text message time slot was exactly when I was going to be out. Fortunately I got another text bringing it forward so didn't need them to take delivery BUT what I would have done is given them the keys to my garage and asked them to have it delivered to there (space ready made) and just lock up. Your neighbour is an arse for not giving you her keys and getting the bed delivered to her house.

BrianButterfield · 24/01/2015 17:05

I might, with prior agreement, take in a bed delivery for someone, but I would need the notice so I could make space in my garage or another room in advance. I would do this for neighbours who I know would do similar for me - but not without explicitly being asked first!

FryOneFatManic · 24/01/2015 17:05

YWAbsolutelyNBU. She knew you would have refused.

Are they really sleeping on the floor? Don't they have a spare bed?

ImCatbug · 24/01/2015 17:08

And I felt bad when my neighbour had to take in my (compact boxed) vacuum delivery for a day!
A bed! Bloody hell, that is really taking the piss, YADNBU to have refused.

BlackbirdOnTheWire · 24/01/2015 17:10

Wow, some people on this thread must have massive houses. Or empty garages.

I wish we had that much space. We have absolutely nowhere we could put a bed, unless we dismantled the dining room table, stacked up all the chairs and put them in the sitting room AND the bed would be able to turn the corner from the front door into the dining room without taking out the newel post of the stairs. Then we would have nowhere to eat for a week, and we wouldn't be able to use the sitting room as six dining chairs, even stacked, would fill it. We could put in the hall, but then wouldn't be able to access the kitchen door, which could be a problem... But still, there are PPs who would think it v unreasonable of us not to inconvenience ourselves in this way for a week for a neighbour!

OP YADNBU! Your neighbour should have planned better - like not got rid of her old bed until after the new one arrived. After all, if you have somewhere to store an extra bed for a week, she could have stored that same new bed in her house until the old one had gone...

bighairyspider · 24/01/2015 17:10

YWNBU! She's made her bed so she can lie in it.

Summerisle1 · 24/01/2015 17:11

YANBU. It's hardly a fucking parcel is it?

We've got quite a capacious house but even we couldn't find room to store a bed and a mattress for 4 days without losing a sitting room. Something I know for a fact after recently buying a new bed and mattress!

They were taking the piss I'm afraid especially since you would have been quite willing to have a key and be around to let the delivery people into their house so they could store their own sodding bed! A bit of honestly from your neighbours and the whole issue could have been...well...a non-issue!