To be peed off with a 3am phone call?!

[SquidgyMaltLoaf]

I probably am but hey ho. DB's wife had a baby at 2am and he rang me at 3am to tell me - texted, then tried my phone, then DH's when I didn't answer (mine was purposely on silent!). I can't get back to sleep and as I have a five month old myself, sleep is now very precious!! We purposely waited til morning to phone people when our baby was born. There's no way I can go back to sleep now and I've only had two hours

I know I'm being a grumpy cow but could he not have waited just a few hours?! I have no idea how I'm going to get through tomorrow with a lively baby. WIBU to thump him when I see him after I've cooed over the baby?!

Yanbu! Sleep is important!!!!! (& I feel like crying with sleep deprivation myself today, one hours snooze since 1 30 am, a constantly feeding 3 mth old and a 21 mth old, and DH snapped at me about having an "episode" when I asked him to hold DD as she wouldn't settle and I needed to shower and brush my teeth Argh!!!!! Sorry! Off topic!!!!!) YANBU. It wasn't an emergency and I think it's rude to interrupt people's sleep.

We had our baby at home at 4am, and called dh's parents at 6:30am just after the midwives left, and that was early enough for them I reckon - both are retired, late risers and whilst I wanted them to be the absolute first to know, I wouldn't have dreamed of calling pre 6am. My parents aren't around so it wasn't an issue on that side.

However whilst he may be being unreasonable, your brother is ultra excited so try and be pleased for him, and don't ever tell him your initial, also unreasonable, reaction.

Interesting that everyone who suffers from bad insomnia is saying YANBU - that's my feeling too, and definitely coloured by years of terrible insomnia! Sleep is just so precious to me. And of course it's so much harder with a waking baby too - mine were still waking three or four times in the night at 5 months.

I'm definitely in the "are you sure they wanted you to ring in the middle of the night?" camp.

Much as I love them, I would have no trouble waiting until morning to hear my DBs wonderful news (I have four DBs and six DNs, and thankfully not one has rung in the middle of the night - only texts).

Of course YANBU. If someone phones me in the middle of the night I assume there must be a terrible emergency and snap wide awake, so I can't get back to sleep. You should never ring at 3 am for anything less.

I've had nieces and nephews born at all sorts of unearthly hours, and was more than happy to get a text, and find it when I woke up.
I guess he was excited, and just wanted to tell you.
In a few months, he will probably realise firsthand how precious sleep is, with a small baby.
Hope you can take it easy later today, and get some rest anytime you get the chance.

YABU and a bit self centred tbh! Your brother has called you to tell you he's a dad and you are an aunt and all you're concerned about is yourself? And not only that, your first thought is to posts on MN that your pissed off about it?

It's one night!

Ah but you see, as a bad sleeper, I feel it's the brother who's being self-centred. No way would I get back to sleep after 3am call - I would have thought someone had died with a call at that time, too much adrenalin. Not that I would have said so to a DB of mine if they'd rung me in similar circs of course. But I'd definitely have felt like the OP.

Yabu
Its one night of broken sleep
You can sleep again tonight
Your brother will never have that moment again and he wanted to share it with you

Choose I have suffered from insomnia for 24 years and I am saying she is being unreasonable . I am used to functioning on so little sleep so another night of bad sleep would make little difference. Plus I would probably have already been awake anyway!

I do not think YABU at all. Middle of the night calls should be for emergencies only, surely? I'd have thought "oh no, what's happened?" if my phone rang at that hour. Surprised so many people would be OK with this...

YANBU, but I wouldn't say anything, unless he's having another child!

People who disagree with OP, could they please do it without using personal insults (as many have). She is a sleep deprived mother with PTSD from her birth experience having a bit of a moan on MN. Calling her names is uncalled for.

YANBU, my sister was in labour in the middle of the night ( I had a 6 week old) and my mum texted to let me know baby had arrived safely, I always have my mobile on silent so when I was up again an hour or so after the text, it was lovely to hear!

My DD was born at 6.15am & my DP was so excited he was ringing everyone even though I told him to at least wait until 7am or send a text. I think he must have just been glad to do something....perhaps the same for you DB.

Congratulations, it'll be lovely having cousins so close in age

I meant that many had managed to disagree without insulting her!

YANBU at all

Nobody needs to hear this in the middle of the night, whether they have sleep issues or a baby themselves, or not.

Gotto I go to sleep fine, but if I'm woken can't sleep again so probably that's why I'm feeling the pain! Likewise I am by now used to functioning on very little sleep, but it sounds like OP isn't yet, plus the depression too - feel for her.

Yanbu
Yanbu
Yanbu
Yanbu at all!

Unless you'd specified that you wanted to be informed asap, then YANBU.

Depression and sleep deprivation is a horrible, horrible combination.

I completely understand that DB was excited, and may have lost track of the time. However, to text, and then to follow up by phoning is unreasonable on his part.

I don't think you're being a grumpy cow, Squidgy - I think you're tired, and depressed. Hope you can grab a bit of sleep later today.

Also, are people missing that OP put her phone on silent to avoid being disturbed and DB persisted by trying her DH?

Yes true Choose, OP is clearly struggling. Like I said I think my response is probably also coloured by the fact that my DB died when we was 27 and I'd be thrilled to have the chance to get such a phone call.

Sleep deprivation and depression are horrific though so I hope you managed to get some sleep eventually OP .

hmm I'm on the fence with this one. ideally your db should have checked before the baby was born whether you'd be ok with a middle of the night call. In our case, both sets of parents wanted to know as soon as dd was born, whatever time of day or night, whereas my sister could wait until morning. I hate losing sleep and have a five month old too but I still think I'd have been excited to hear the news (but only if it was my side of the family...dh's brother, not so much). So yanbu to be annoyed but yabu if you take it up with your brother.

Ive known lots of babies born a night. Never known anyone call relatives to let them know til a more appropriate hour though!

To many people a phone call in the night would mean one thing - a problem.

So I don't think yabu. It's exciting news but could have waited another few hours. At least til 6/7am anyway.

And yes - a text, fine. A call, less so.

When DD was 3 mo my sister called me at 3am just to tell me she was in labour. Then again at 5am asking me to be with her. I then stayed up for 20 hrs with her and babies dad, 9 of which she had an epidural and was sleeping! I'd have been delighted with just a phone call! But no I don't think your being u r, sleep is precious with a baby.. They'll understand in a week or so!

Yanbu. I can just imagine the look on my brother's face if I'd have called him at that time of day, and it wouldn't be this . Although I'm smiling just thinking about it! Yes he would be excited. But only after 9am.

Fair enough to parents, but no, I wouldn't have called my brother or BIL at that time. Hope you get some rest today!

Sorry GotTo missed that you were the same PP who had lost your DB very different perspective, I'm sorry for your loss.