AIBU to wonder why everyone seems so interested in how long I'll breastfeed DD for?

[Fox28]

Lately, every time I see a friend/family member who I haven't seen in a little while, the first thing out of their mouth seems to be "Oh, are you still breastfeeding DD? When are you going to stop?"

I wouldn't mind if it was said in a way like the person was just showing interest, but it's clearly asked as they feel like it'd be "weird" if I didn't stop soon... DD is 5 months old

I was ready to face criticism/glares from strangers when feeding out and about, but have experienced none. I wasn't expecting this. Why are the people who are closest to me the ones who are trying to make me feel uncomfortable?

Just this week my DM asked for the 100th time when I was going to stop. I said I hadn't decided and will just see what happens. I explained DD would need breast milk or formula until she's 1, so I might just carry on until then. DM said "No, that's too long"

Wibu to just tell everyone to mind their own business? I don't see why it makes any difference to them what I do or don't do.

I haven't breast fed outdoors in absolute ages because his feeding routine means I'm always at home when he's due one.

My DS is coming up 10m old and only BF's three times a day: as soon as he wakes up, immediately before his afternoon nap and his final feed at bedtime.

He obviously has his three meals a day and he drinks water from his beaker throughout the day when he wants it.

I don't think it is anything to do with early weaning so much as being part of a generation when bottle feeding was almost universal.

I would ask if you were bottle fed and, if so, what age you were when you had your final bottle. I would guess it was very much older than 5 months. You can then turn it round and say something like, 'what do you mean, I still had bottles at 18 months? Surely, I could have managed to drink out of a cup by then!'

Both my DM and MIL asked constantly. After about 3 months I said "in two weeks" every time they asked, for a year :) I think they got the message in the end because they didn't ask once with DD!

ah cecily, people of my age only had formula for 6 months (not sure when that changed). The bottles is different of course because they then had cows milk.

It's just so weird how obsessed people are. Such a rude question, so bizarre, you get judged whatever you do. yanbu op.

Both of mine voluntarily lost interest around a year. Advice is until 2 though so I am still reminded by my family how I 'let them down'. In my experience everyone seems to only have negative opinions no matter how you feed your babies!

This sort of invasive question is highly annoying when you have a baby. I had the opposite problem. Lots of people telling me it was "such a shame" that I was only able to bf Dd for a short time. Even now those people sometimes say "oh I can't stand all those mums who can't be bothered to bf"!! It is rude, none of their business and I give them very short shrift!

Or what Stickingpoint said!

And you're also terrible if you bf your children for "too long".

Society has a very low opinion of mothers, criticised for every decision.

Sorry but there is no advice saying "until 2", if you mean the WHO they recommend bf for a minimum of two years. No point on a thread which is supportive of bf, giving out messages that after two is not recommended!

I'm in the minority, and I don't have kids but I think it's odd to breastfeed a child over a year, 18 months at most. I think it's mostly done for the mother's benefit. There is a reason why children start cutting teeth, and it isn't for breastfeeding.

Yeah, I think it's pretty clear that the people who say "it's for the mother's benefit" don't know what they're talking about.

...they cut teeth so they can chew food, do you think bf babies aren't given solids after sound 6 months? Should ff babies not get a bottle once they start feeding, after all they have teeth?
Really wondering what I get out of bf my toddler, other than seeing how happy it makes him

One of my colleagues was obsessed about when I was going to stop bfing ds. I just said 'at some point before he goes to university' in the end.

I'm 42, and was bf, but my mum started making comments about ds being 'obsessed' after he was 9 months old, and MIL used to just go on about how could he grow so big on bm.

DS gave up bfing at 23 months old in the end

Well I suppose I "benefit" in the sense that I "benefit" from an evening NOT spent listening to a distressed 2yo with a bad cold sobbing for a breastfeed until she's sick, but other than that I'm struggling to see how I'm benefiting - I would be absolutely delighted to wear normal bras again, not have to feed (it's always been very painful for me), be able to drink in the evening and go out to dinner - but unfortunately my DD has other ideas, and if you think I'm doing it for MY benefit just because I'd prefer not to cause a lot of needless distress to a very small child rather than just give her one bf a night, then I guess I must be doing it for my benefit

My family and friends don't ask as they are all live and let live types.
MIL is totally different though. When DS was 7 months she asked when I was going to stop and I told her that the WHO recommends bf until 2. Loved the look on her face and her comment of 'well I stopped feeding DS at 8 months as he just didn't want it any more'. I said 'that's nice, I'll wait until my DS doesn't want it anymore too'. I fed him until 18 months

Babies don't need milk after their teeth start coming through??

That's funny.

Does that mean bottle fed babies aren't allowed to have a drink or a bottle after they start teething too? Or is it only breast fed babies that don't require fluids??

We've already had a thread this week about full term breastfeeding, complete with comments about how we're all doing it for our own benefit. Go find it if you want to talk about how odd it is.

Babies don't need milk after their milk teeth come through? Agreed, that is funny!

What about those babies born with teeth? Or that get them at only a couple of months old? Are they supposed to go without milk until they can start on solids when they're around 6 months?

If she says "that's too long again", reply with

"According to who? I'd like to see the scientific evidence you have based that opinion on, so I can make an informed decision because WHO suggest two years"

Watch how quickly she shuts up.

"At least 2" RedToothBrush* but good response!

Seff It's a well known fact that if a baby has teeth at birth, you don't have to give it any breastmilk or formula, you can just pop into kfc on the way home from the birth and see what it fancies off the £1 menu.

I had a friend who believed milk was only necessary until the baby could walk. She stopped feeding the day they took their first step - didn't replace with formula or cows milk, just food and water/juice from that day on! One of hers was only 9 months old when they started walking!

I think there should be some basic education in schools about baby needs.

Oh crap, DD's teeth started cutting through at 4 months, 1 through every 2 weeks. I'm a really shit mum, I obviously should have stopped feeding her and made her wait the 2 months before she could go onto solids.

I probably should have had words with the cat as well. Kittens normally get weaned at 8 weeks but the kitten we kept she kept feeding until he was over 10 months. Bloomin' over invested, needy cat mum.

I hope you tutted loudly at her and told her she was only doing it for her own benefit. I bet the kitten had TEETH and everything!

Yes, all of them! The nerve of some cats!