And this years culinary cliches go to....

[superstarheartbreaker]

Salted Caramel and pulled pork.

Delicious but everywhere.

Anything to add?

Sliders= mini burgers on mini buns. Big deal

brittwhyatt.tumblr.com/post/89881245835/how-to-floating-malteser-cake

"the upended bag is suspended over the cake. "
How?

otto FUCKING lenghi

piss right off

breathes

That's. really good :o

Love the Malteser cake. I made these creations, which, when cut open, have a secret cache of sweeties inside and several KitKats around the outside.

Bit sickly though!

Me and dh just finished watching Masterchef the professionals on catch up last night and I got sick of the sight of squab pigeon... And foams and how the further on the competition got, the smaller the portions and larger the plates. And don't even get me started on the concept food at muggaritz. No, I don't want to eat something that looks like a rock or a turd thanks!

Oh yes, foams.. frothy spit. Yuk!

Over explained menus....... "Our meat is from local butcher Mr blah who only buys corn fed, free range blah from farms within a 10 mile radius.... All our drinks are made by local craft brewers and our bread baked by Mrs artisan baker from local hipster bakery, using fancy mill flour...... Coffee is roasted by local coffee roaster Mr blah..... "

Concept food? Should I google it? if you eat with your eyes, that does not sound appealing.

Plating using 'negative space'

Its just a half empty plate . For FORTY QUID.

Artisan everything is getting on my nerves too oh the slates and chopping boards too!

chippyminton I don't know if 'concept food' is an actual term I just made it up to describe all the harping on about philosophies and the like

I have stomach ache from laughing at this lot. It is reminiscent of last year's tirade against Nigel Slater's smuggery.

My biggest issue is that since they so lovingly curate the contents of their kitchens they should employ a chef that can actually cook. Too many times you read gastronimic wankery descriptions on the menu only to be met with the sad reality of overcooked, over-salted food.

Oh and whoever invented "foam" should be shot. I don't pay £20+ for a main course to have someone spit on it

3+1's right about the smaller the portion, the bigger the plate-and bill.

My idea of near hell is a slate with a skid mark underneath the meat and spit over it, tho.

Yes. Heritage carrots. There is a reason they are heritage - they taste awful.

Really sorry I wasn't around last year when the nigel slater smug fest was running, sure I would have loved that.

Over /and/ undercooked food. Al dente is fine, bleeding raw isn't, unless you're expecting crudités.

Meals with a chilli zing

interesting article in the evening standard about dirty food.

I'm starving

Heritage carrots, my arse! (as Jim Royle would say ) Let's give things stupid names and the stupid public will pay more for anything!

And as for courgette flowers in a crispy batter... do they think we're stupid?? (don't answer that! ). I will not eat flowers on principle. End of.

billion course tasting menus

either I really like something, in which case I want more than a weeny spoonful, or it's pretty average, so why bother?

We do one size fits all catering at home - if I'm going out for dinner I want to choose what I want.

Thanks for that link wheredo. I was starting to feel peckish and that's completely killed my appetite. Off to mix myself a 'clean' Bombay sapphire and tonic.

Btw, I was eating stuffed and battered courgette flowers years ago in Italy. They were lovely. There again, after my mums cooking, everything tasted lovely. [embarrassed]

I did have pulled ox cheek served in a bone the other week. Shot of bourbon with it that you're supposed to tip over it. I just drank it like I was in an Indiana Jones movie & ate the meat as it was.