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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Family are now not coming to us for Christmas!

53 replies

SweetiePie0 · 23/12/2014 22:28

I am fuming!

We had invited my parents, DH parents and my grandmother just as we do every year - everyone has been keen to come over.

At the beginning of the week the in laws say that they aren't coming as they have the flu ( they have both had flu jabs and are well known for backing out of invites)- I say that they have a few days to get better, take meds etc and keep warm.... This evening my mum calls to say that their dog is ill and now my dad is saying that they shouldn't come for Christmas because of the dog. My grandmother then declares that she has been invited elsewhere so is going there this year...

I have an 18lbs turkey sitting in brine, a huge piece of gammon cooking and a fridge full of food - would I be unreasonable to never invite these people for Christmas again and spend the huge amount of money that we have spent on a trip to Dubai next year?!

I am sure as hell not going to attend the in laws 'January' lunch which we all have to endure every year - think I might have the flu!

And breath .....

OP posts:
Bowchickawowow · 23/12/2014 22:30

When it comes to the lunch, just say no, we're not coming and leave it at that. And enjoy Christmas!

Rosa · 23/12/2014 22:31

hell no get booking ......and maybe get some freezer bags for the excess turkey!

DandyHighwayman · 23/12/2014 22:31

Please don't invite them again

How rude!

Well praps not the flu ridden ones, mebbe

AnyFuckerForAMincePie · 23/12/2014 22:32

Yep, perfect excuse to fuck off to sunnier climes next year jealous

timetoplay · 23/12/2014 22:32

I would cancel the lunch and do your own thing next year. At least the bonus is that you can do what you want, when you want this year and have leftovers for soup, sandwiches, curry etc.

SoonToBeMrsB · 23/12/2014 22:34

Tell them all to piss off.

Enjoy Dubai! Wink

Bowchickawowow · 23/12/2014 22:34

Also ham is the highlight of christmas for me. Sharing it with fewer people is like a gift!

NobodyLivesHere · 23/12/2014 22:34

Well in fairness if you are ill or have a sick pet that can't be helped. But your gm just buggering off is rude. Just do something else next year.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 23/12/2014 22:35

Not having to spend Christmas with your family? Result.

PurpleSwift · 23/12/2014 22:35

Can your parents bring the dog? :S

No, Yanbu. I'd be mad and dissapointed.

FunkyBoldRibena · 23/12/2014 22:35

Cook it all, and freeze - it will keep you fed for the month.

HoHonutty · 23/12/2014 22:37

I'd be pleased but if you're not then don't ever invite them again.

Original poster
SweetiePie0 · 23/12/2014 22:39

Thank you everyone - feel really annoyed - we put a lot into Christmas because nobody else bothers and expect us to provide everything - what is the frickin point if being a family member when no- one can be bothered to put the effort in....

OP posts:
Mousefinkle · 23/12/2014 22:39

Oh tell them you're going to their regular January lunch, big it up majorly so they think you're really excited to go as well then a few days before come down with the flu Xmas Grin.

NoArmaniNoPunani · 23/12/2014 22:40

OP is stealth boasting. She gets to chill out in her pjs and have a wonderful day doing everything her way while the rest of us are eating dinner with people we don't like.

Viviennemary · 23/12/2014 22:40

Don't invite them again. Cheeky bunch. I never believe this ill at the last minute stuff. Go round to their house and check.

Biscuitsneeded · 23/12/2014 22:42

Are you on friendly terms with another family who are local to you? Get together and do lunch. It's far more fun than with relatives, anyway...

Bowchickawowow · 23/12/2014 22:44

while the rest of us are eating dinner with people we don't like

The definition of Christmas.

AMerryScot · 23/12/2014 22:44

It's excessive to have an 18lb Turkey and a ham. The shops are shut for about 36 hours so you can easily restock. I don't even plan to buy my turkey until tomorrow afternoon.

If you know they have poor form, you are doubly liable for the excess.

I would suggest that you ask them to come as soon as they are better and serve cold cuts of Turkey and ham.

JourneyToThePlacentaOfTheEarth · 23/12/2014 22:46

Bloody cheek! After all that effort and expense too! Book next year's trip asap before you change your mind

StilleNachtCarolling · 23/12/2014 22:51

Just to play devil's advocate here...you can still get flu even if you've had the flu jab!

Also, I have to ask - why is your turkey sitting in brine? Confused

In terms of your parents, YANBU unless the dog is at death's door. If it isn't then they can bring it with them.
In terms of your gran, YANBU. She is incredibly rude to accept another invitation for dinner when she'd already accepted yours!

PulpsNotFiction · 23/12/2014 22:55

Send them a copy of your food and drink receipts. How rude!

bogiesaremyonlyfriend · 23/12/2014 22:56

That's terrible! Obviously you will have gone to a huge amount of effort and expense. Uanbu to never invite them again, in fact it would be unreasonable to invite them!!

Original poster
SweetiePie0 · 23/12/2014 23:02

The brine is nigella's super juicy turkey recipe Smile. I got a huge turkey because I split up the meat so everyone has leftovers to take home Hmm

I am going to take some cold cuts, mince pies etc over to elderly neighbours - we are going to a party on sat night so going to take the trifle, party stuff etc there...

The wine and spirits will be drunk Xmas day whilst I am holiday hunting for 2015!

Stuff em all ! This is the last year I put myself out for anyone!

OP posts:
tiggytape · 23/12/2014 23:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.