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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To speak to the teacher about this Christmas card?

155 replies

ChristmasInsanity · 16/12/2014 17:30

My 6yo DS came home from school and was opening Christmas cards. He got one from a girl in his class which read 'to insanity's son, I don't like you. From child'

I dont know the parents or child so I was going to take it to the teacher tomorrow?

OP posts:
Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:00

Im another one saying of course its not bullying. I actually think its quite funny. She probably likes him really.

GoogleyEyes · 16/12/2014 19:01

I would assume the parents had no idea. I certainly didn't read any of the Xmas cards my 6yo wrote - was too busy stopping her little sister drawing on the table and cooking tea.

Worth mentioning to the teacher, in case it's the tip of an iceberg.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:04

Telling him she doesn't like him isn't exactly a crime now is it. They are 6 for godsake. Just ask your son why and leave it at that.

SoonToBeSix · 16/12/2014 19:04

I think saying anything would be an over reaction , they are six.

HamishBamish · 16/12/2014 19:09

How is it funny Tinks? Let's hope this girl's parents don't have the same attitude as you.

My DS is 6 and he would understand writing that kind of thing in a Christmas card is downright nasty. Yes, speak to the teacher. This girl needs to be pulled up on it. If she was my child I would want to know,

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:13

Oh get over yourself Hamish really.

Blue69 · 16/12/2014 19:13

Alarming that anyone would think it "quite funny" to upset a 6 year old child as he opens his Christmas cards.

Xmas Sad
WidowWadman · 16/12/2014 19:14

I once caught my 5 year old writing "dear x you can't come to my party. Love, widowchild". There wasn't even a party planned, it was just random. We had a conversation with her why it's really not OK to do that. I'm glad I caught her when she put them in her schoolbag. I'd have been mortified. She didn't even mean to be mean and was really really sorry when I pulled her up on it.

WidowWadman · 16/12/2014 19:15

Meant to add - yes talk to the teacher so it can be addressed, but don't read to much into it.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:16

Only on mumsnet Grin I'd ask my son whether they had a bit of a scrap (which they probably have) and leave it at that. I certainly wouldnt "confront" the parent or speak to the teacher, how silly.

UterusUterusGhali · 16/12/2014 19:17

They're six.
She'll be madly in love with him again by the end of the week.
Everyone is tired and cranky this week.

HeraldAngelSinging · 16/12/2014 19:18

What a fuss about nothing! One 6 year old to another. It should just be ignored. Get a life, OP!

What next? He pushed me off the lowest branch of the tree? He beat me at conkers? I lost a marble? We played jacks and I couldn't do it? I lost in the 100 yard sprint? Dear God! I didn't qualify for the marathon? Where's my hanky?

Mummeeeeeee!

MeMyselfAnd1 · 16/12/2014 19:19

Show the card the teacher, they may not be able to do anything about the card, but the girl with stay in their radar as a bully madam to keep an eye on.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:21

Better still take it straight to the nearest police station Grin

Blue69 · 16/12/2014 19:22

Dismissive types here on this thread saying " get over yourself" and "get a life" are the ones invalidating sensitivity and exhibiting bullying tendencies, themselves.

Stopmithering · 16/12/2014 19:25

I wouldn't take it so seriously personally.
I remember DD writing Christmas cards when she was about 6.
One of them had a similar message, 'To Sandra, happy Christmas, love Barbara. P.s. I don't like you'
Obviously this did not get sent!
Turns out Sandra had not been very nice to DD that day (can't remember details, clearly something important to a 6 year old at the time)
It did take a while for DD to understand why this wasn't on.
Things are a bit black and white in a 6 year old's head and she thought it was better to tell the truth.
I don't think this child was deliberately 'nasty' or bullying. Just a 6 year old voicing opinions.

rumbleinthrjungle · 16/12/2014 19:26

Definitely share with teacher. In many primary schools they have a rule about kind words and 'is everyone having fun', this would be taken seriously.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:26

Grin have a baileys or something Blue and chill out.

Mrmonkey · 16/12/2014 19:29

I'm a teacher and I would want to know. It is not bullying but it is also not acceptable either.

flippinada · 16/12/2014 19:32

No, she shouldn't have done it - regardless of whether she really means it or not it's unkind and shouldn't be laughed at or condoned. Nor does it follow that the girl is a horrible bully - it could be pure silliness.

I imagine a quiet word from the teacher explaining it's not a nice thing to do would nip it in the bud.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:34

Be prepared OP to find out what your son did though to provoke this Grin

MisForMumNotMaid · 16/12/2014 19:35

That's the exact point MrMonkey. Its not acceptable.

Children do silly things. Who hasn't had to stop themselves from laughing whilst having a firm word with their child?

Just because its funny it doesn't make the behaviour acceptable or dismissable.

Tinks42 · 16/12/2014 19:40

Im of the opinion that adults intervene far too much sometimes in things that children can sort out themselves (and blow things up out of proportion0. I had a fantastic mentor/teacher whilst doing my various exams in childcare that told me this.

UterusUterusGhali · 16/12/2014 19:41

Blue, having a different opinion is not bullying.

Show me how my post is bulling.

One person's "invalidating sensitivity" is another's "not sweating the small stuff".

BarbarianMum · 16/12/2014 19:43

I agree with flippinada who gives the whole incident a much needed sense of proportion (vis a vis the thread rather than the OP)