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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To speak to the teacher about this Christmas card?

155 replies

ChristmasInsanity · 16/12/2014 17:30

My 6yo DS came home from school and was opening Christmas cards. He got one from a girl in his class which read 'to insanity's son, I don't like you. From child'

I dont know the parents or child so I was going to take it to the teacher tomorrow?

OP posts:
MomOfTwoGirls2 · 16/12/2014 17:59

Op's name is XXXinsanity... It was addressed to her son.

MrTumblesBavarianFanbase · 16/12/2014 17:59

Hatespiders Xmas GrinXmas Grin That's unintentionally hilarious Flowers

Tapewormuprisings · 16/12/2014 18:06

Yes, I would. That's really unkind.

A similar thing happened in DS's class. It was sent anonymously, but the teachers brought it up in class (without mentioning the name of who it was sent too) and said they were pretty sure they knew who it was, not a nice thing to do etc etc. DS came home and told me about it so it obviously made an impression.

RobotRuthy · 16/12/2014 18:06

I was wondering how the 6 year old could spell "Insanity's son"...I wondered what DVD she'd been watching!! but commended her spelling.

I'm afraid I laughed when I realised.

It's only a 6 year old being honest, bless. Not everybody's going to like your kids as much as you do OP. Hurtful as it is.

MisForMumNotMaid · 16/12/2014 18:12

If my son wrote a card like that I'd be mortified. There are children he doesn't like in his class, some with good reason - like the boy who thought it was funny to wee over him.

I would not just dismiss as children are honest.

I'd mention to the teacher.

hhhhhhh · 16/12/2014 18:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lolalotta · 16/12/2014 18:14

Just awful! Report it for sure! Shock

Hatespiders · 16/12/2014 18:14

Glad I'm not the only one, Robot! Actually, Insanity's Sons (in the plural) would make a good name for a boyband.

If all the little girl wrote was 'I don't like you' I wouldn't do anything. It's just children's squit ('nonsense' in Norfolk)

I'm really giggling now. Honestly I get more senile every day. Sorry everyone!

Blue69 · 16/12/2014 18:15

Tell the teacher!

Gives the "I dont like you" child the chance to get taught that christmas cards arent for bitchery.

Hope your DS is ok and his experience doesnt sour opening cards for ever!

Cant help thinking maybe child writing the card was having a "moment" and just in a generalised grump.

cassgate · 16/12/2014 18:17

Same thing has happened to us although my ds is 8. He came home from school last week with a card from one of the girls in class that said (don't like you!) in it. Ds wasn't bothered but I was and as I work at the school was going to speak to the teacher. Dh persuaded me to ignore it but as it turned out she had written similar in all the boys cards. She thought it funny. Nice.

ladeedad · 16/12/2014 18:20

if the girl is anything like I was when I wss 6, then the girl secretly really likes OP's DS.

dragdownthemoon · 16/12/2014 18:21

I did something like this as a kid, I was dared to by another girl in the class, it was a boy I fancied when I was 10... The teacher found out and spoke to me about how words can hurt people even if we mean them as a joke. I felt horrible and have never forgotten it. The girl who dared me to do it laughed and said the boy would never fancy me now :( then she held his hand at playtime cry

youarekiddingme · 16/12/2014 18:23

I'd mention it. If this girl can write that down where an adult will see it I dread to think what she says quietly behind closed doors.

PinkSquash · 16/12/2014 18:24

DS1 had a card like this last Year, we spoke to his teacher and they dealt with it really well.

It's bloody nasty writing messages like that, especially in a Christmas Card.

nequidnimis · 16/12/2014 18:28

I sent a card like that at a similar age.

The boy kept asking me to be his girlfriend and my friends kept telling him I liked him. I thought I was doing him a favour by clearing it up!

I would mention it to the teacher so that she knows what's going on, but in a low key way because there might be some context.

apotatoprintinapeartree · 16/12/2014 18:28

As if teachers haven't enough to do Xmas Grin
forget it and move on, maybe the poor kids mum made her write one for the whole class and she'd had enough by the time it got to the OPs

OP, pick your battles, mountains and molehills etc.
It's not nice but most people would be talking to teachers/ kids parents most days if they got involved all the time.

Most little boys are smelly when you are a six year old girl Xmas Grin

clam · 16/12/2014 18:47

I'm a teacher and yes, we are busy, but I sure as Hell would want to know about this!

olbas · 16/12/2014 18:49

This happened to Ds1 when he was 6. He just wrote back.." I'm deadistanted(NOT). He meant devastated!

greenbananas · 16/12/2014 18:52

I think you should tell the teacher, but quietly. As another poster had said, there might be some background.

This little girl needs to know that what she did was mean, but it's much safer to let the teacher deal with it. She'll probably have a word work the girl, and will probably tell the parents without naming your son - so much less confrontational and avoids potential problems with the parents.

greenbananas · 16/12/2014 18:53

("work" was supposed to be "with" - sorry! )

PortofinoVino · 16/12/2014 18:53

It's not bullying, for goodness sake. People are allowed to dislike one another, you know.

skylark2 · 16/12/2014 18:53

I would tell the teacher in a "so you're aware" way - but I agree with the posters who said it was probably a reaction based on parents forcing her to write cards for everyone in the class, and not aimed at the OP's son at all.

ThePinkOcelot · 16/12/2014 18:54

Ahh Olbas, bless him.

Op, I would have a word with the teacher.

callmekitten · 16/12/2014 18:56

I would talk to the teacher and see if there has been an issue between the two of them. It sounds really nasty to read that but at 6 I think it is entirely possible that she doesn't really understand the meaning of what she wrote.

NowBringUsSomeFuzzpiggyPudding · 16/12/2014 18:59

6yos can be brutally honest and tactless but I think most would know not to write something horrible like that in a card - it's different to just blurting something out thoughtlessly.