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Original poster

Was this rude or am I expecting too much from people?

101 replies

LennyCrabsticks · 02/12/2014 07:39

BIL came round to see dh last night. He stuck his head in the living room to say hello and asked what I was watching, then said, blimey, that's a big telly.

I started to tell him about it (it's new and I'm a bit excited about it) and he said that he couldn't see any difference between that and his telly and that they didn't even have a flat screen and that we obviously like spending money and he's never understood people buying huge loud tellies for their home.

I wasn't expecting him to fawn all over it fgs but he brought it up and then shat all over it.

I have other issues with DH's family and what I perceive as rudeness towards me but I keep being told it's me being over sensitive. This one has pissed me off so I'm asking the MN jury.

Aibu to think you don't walk into someone's house and slag off their stuff?

OP posts:
Osmiornica · 02/12/2014 08:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

diddl · 02/12/2014 08:26

You didn't expect him to fawn over it, but you were boasting about it.

"Isn't commenting on the size of the telly the new small talk and supposed to elicit a 'fine thanks' response rather than a full medical history?"

That exactly!

DealForTheKids · 02/12/2014 08:27

Erm, yeah, have to say I come from a family where my mum and dad might go 'didn't they have a big television ?!' when we leave. Not a MN thing. Blush

That said, even they wouldn't be rude enough to do anything but smile if it was pointed out, and certainly wouldn't raise it.

I certainly wouldn't dream of offending someone's choices, in their own house or not. He is rude. (But you probably shouldn't have gone on about the functions! Sadly (like children's achievements) they are rarely interesting to anyone else...)

WizardOfToss · 02/12/2014 08:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

darlingfascistbullyboy · 02/12/2014 08:37

you'd have me baking away with an inane grin & an errr okay then if you started going on about your TV's functions ... I think I'd be more interested in the contents of your pfb's nappy [i.e. not very]. Technology bores are unbearable.

He shouldn't have been rude though I guess!

(I'm from another no TV household - when we did eventually get one we weren't allowed to watch ITV - big screen snobby existed well before mumsnet!)

Mrsjayy · 02/12/2014 08:42

not allowed to watch itv

Whippet81 · 02/12/2014 08:43

He was rude.

I am not bothered by tellys but make it about me saying that 'I can't tell the difference' but would never comment about wasting money. DP has just bought a new one and when BIL rushed in cooing me and SIL were rolling our eyes at each other but people can have what they want and if someone is obviously excited then why piss on their chips?

Jealousy.

southeastastra · 02/12/2014 08:45

oh right just a weird snooty middle class thing then

elQuintoConyo · 02/12/2014 08:50

Another one here not allowed to watch ITV Mrsjayy it's surprisingly common (er... as in, lots of people brought up that way, not common 'common' - that's what my parents thought ITV was Blush )

OP, your BIL was being a smallminded shitbag. He probably thought it made his dick look small - is he one of those odious men who comment about only having 'girlfriends with small hands' ??

People comment our tv is the size of a pea. That'sb ecause it pretty much is! But it's our pea, and no doubt we'll get a bigger one when this one breathes its last (6 years old so far).

Thanks for your poor TV!

whois · 02/12/2014 08:52

My parents Have a bit of big TV snobbery... DP and I have a reasonably big TV in a reasonably small living room. Dad always comments!

When I go home I have fun commenting on how small their TV is (tiny) in a massive room and how I can't actually see what's going on. Not even joking, it's really hard to watch!

Anyway. BiL was rude. Wouldn't have kiled him to have said "oh yea, very nice". Just cod someone is going on a bit you don't have to rain on their parade.

HumphreyCobbler · 02/12/2014 08:56

He was very rude. It is normal to enthuse about a new purchase when you are excited about it. The correct response is to say something positive.

TBH, even if people do boast about their possessions (not saying you were OP) it is staggeringly rude to be so negative in return. Two wrongs don't make a right.

And the lift thing is AWFUL! That would really put me off a person.

Mrsjayy · 02/12/2014 08:57

Itv sobbery just made my day

WizardOfToss · 02/12/2014 08:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mrsjayy · 02/12/2014 09:04

Mum and dad are looking for a new tv dad thinks the tube is going (not convinced their telly has a tube) mum wants a wee telly dad can t work out where everything goes they are to flat apparently they want dh to go with them to pick it good luck with that dear

Mrsjayy · 02/12/2014 09:06

Belly wasn't allowed in my house either but Itv was fine such a confusing childhood I had

elQuintoConyo · 02/12/2014 09:07

Once I got to university, I took great pride in telling my mum on the phone, "hang on, just let me turn the volume down on ITV" or some such nosense! You could hear her suck her teeth from 200 miles away Grin

It means Ihave no idea what people are talking about when they go on about Pob or Tiswas Sad

elQuintoConyo · 02/12/2014 09:09

My DDad taught me:

Wehn shepherds washed their socks at night
While watching ITV
The Angel of the North came down
And switched to BBC

pinkdelight · 02/12/2014 09:11

It's not much to go on admittedly, but I suspect he doesn't like you very much (and why would he? as someone else said it's his DB you chose, not him). It's classic sibling-in-law - you don't agree on things but have to chat in a friendly way which puts a strain on things. You love your telly. He hates it. It comes out as this edgy chat where you annoy him and he offends you. YANBU but I'd stop expecting him to put on more of a veneer of manners just because he's on your property. If this is the relationship, that's just how it is.

Mrsjayy · 02/12/2014 09:13

Pob would have your mum fainting he blew on the screen was spittle everywhere

clam · 02/12/2014 09:13

"That telly is TINY! I can hardly see it!"

I'd take that as a compliment.

LMAO at someone thinking it's about jealousy! Grin

SouthernComforts · 02/12/2014 09:18

The most expensive hotel I've ever stayed in had a big tv built into the wall at the end of the bath.

I've never know tv's to be an indicator of class in rl.

clam · 02/12/2014 09:29

You're mixing in the wrong circles, then! Grin

clam · 02/12/2014 09:31

My parents wouldn't dream of watching any major event on anything other than the BBC.

Although even they wobbled after the dire coverage of the Diamond Jubilee. But that was apparently due to the pernicious dumbing-down influence of ITV and Sky!

SylviaPouncer · 02/12/2014 10:12

Cultural snobbery. The tiniest TV you can find shows that you're too intellectual for everyday pursuits such as TV watching. Even better to get rid of the TV altogether and only listen to Radio 4. Someone recently told me, "Oh, we got rid of the television set when Jemima was born" as if I ought to be very impressed at their stand against plebeian activities.
I love telly myself.

spamanderson · 02/12/2014 10:18

My only response would have likely been 'oh yes, I love a big one, the bigger the better' ;)

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