to think if the government want more mum's in work they need to do something about childcare costs

[wheresthelight]

unplanned pregnancy so no time to save and very ill prior and during pregnancy so was signed off by work's occupational health as unfit for work. due to a variety of issues I didn't go back and dp was adamant we could afford if we tightened reigns etc. due to car issues and Christmas plus dsd's school trips we have had an expensive few months but dp still treats himself to a £5 magazine every week and pays out for a gym membership he doesn't use. I do an admittedly expensive swimming class with dd (now 15 months) but I spend nothing on myself outside of this as I have no money. we get no benefits whatsoever and although dp is on a good wage by the time bills etc is paid there isn't a lot left.

he is stressing about money and I really want to go back to work but due to childcare costs it is proving almost impossible!! nursery is £££ whilst a childminder is not so bad however the job market round here is appalling. everything is either nursing or teaching and am not qualified for either. lots of home help type jobs but due to a disability I am unable to do this but even if I could the wages mean that I would be working for nothing by the time childcare is paid which negates the point of going back to work.

how the hell do people do this??

Hi op, I'm in the same boat, although I don't want to go back to work yet luckily!
If I did, childcare costs would dwarf my take home pay and we would be much less well off than we are with me as a sahp. I'm waiting til my youngest is in school so that only after school care will be required. It makes no financial sense right now for me to work (unless I really enjoyed my job of course and wanted to work for free...er no thanks)?! I did moderately enjoy my job before but not enough to do it for free and sacrifice time with my kids for the pleasure.
FYI, if you're claiming child benefit, your NI contributions will be protected for as long as you claim. Obviously you don't have the benefit of a workplace pension, but a few years out of the workforce won't make too much difference over a lifetime of work if you make a commitment to pay a significant contribution when you do go back.
Yes the government could do more to help subsidise childcare and make work more viable for people, but they'd much rather spunk a load of money on free school meals for primary aged children inc those families who could easily afford it themselves??? Of my peers it's the 0-3 age group where people really struggle financially because of the extortionate cost of childcare. Nobody I know ever complains about how the cost of school dinners or packed lunches is keeping them from going back to work?

YABU. The government has no place dictating to childminders how much they can charge. However, they could definitely steer more funding towards the provision of basic care for low-income families.

your best way out is training to boost your earning potential given that childcare costs are unlikely to go down anytime soon. Have a look around and see what's feasible, childcare costs also don't disappear at 5, there's breakfast, after school and holiday clubs to pay for. Retraining is the solution you need.

Have you considered registering as a CM yourself?
This is what I did, my own dc took one of my under-3 places, but I charged 25 pounds a day for the other two places, got two part timers (one three days, one four days, ended up doing a school pick up from my older dc's school for a tenner a day, and ended up clearing over 200 pounds a week, no childcare costs.
My kids are teens now and I've been out of CM a while, and I know CM involves a good deal of paperwork etc, but it worked for us for a good few years.

Yabu op you can afford to be at home with your own child until they start school. Yes you might not be able to afford everything you want but you are running two cars you are hardly on the breadline. You need to cut your cloth accordingly and accept you have less disposable income now you are a parent.

Yabu. The gov is already helping out.You decided to have a child,your husband is on a good wage and you enjoy luxuries we certainly didn't enjoy with a sahp.

Plan,save.When you have saved enough go back to work.You must have known somebody would need to care for your child whether it be with a sahp or childcare.

Quality childcare is the priority not poor quality childcare or higher taxes for parents who have planned ahead to cover the childcare bills for those who don't.

Sick of this others are responsible for the care of my child mentality.Nobody is other than it's parents.

^^ This with bells on.

We'll said LePetit

Well

Can you not do a qualification and train for something?
I work in childcare. I've worked bloody hard to study for a degree and get promoted to manager. When i started i was unqualified and earned about a tenner a week after travel and childcare costs. I now earn a decent wage and though still not enough compared to teachers
Are you suggesting I should earn less to subsidise your childcare costs?

OP the part of your original post that really stood out to me is that your DH is stressing about money. Is this the motivator for you looking at returning to work and would you rather not, and just spend less? I say this because it seems like you are focussing very much on the negative and the problems, which you would do if you were in a situation you weren't 100% happy about...

Cheesecakemom people dont get paid whilst training to be a nurse at all twenty odd years s ago student nurses got a wage as they were employed by the hospital,than they Brought in project 2000 which I did and we got a non means tested bursery of £360/.month which was a pittance than ,the training has changed many times since than And it is now degree level if student nurses do get a bursery its means tested and op.may well not be entitled to anything!op we managed by working opposite shifts in fact when ds1 was a baby I worked nights for three years and got very little sleep so I looked after ds1 during the day whilst dh worked and dh looked after D's at night when I worked I was hard.

Childminders are self-employed, they run a business, not a charity, they charge what the market will bear. YABU.

I think YABU. Unfair to expect everyone else to pay higher taxes just because you didn't plan your childcare properly.

There is nothing to stop you from starting your own childminding business - sounds like there is plenty of demand in your area. Plus your partner needs to step up - you could work nights or weekends with his support. He sounds unwilling to help with this and him changing his attitude would help solve the problem.

to those suggesting I set up as a CM unfortunately due to an illness I cannot do that plus the set up costs would prohibit it at the moment and likewise retraining is not an option. I have looked into doing courses etc but they are a small fortune here and online and we simply cannot afford it.

and as for those saying "you chose to have your child " actually no I didn't (not that I would be without her now) but she was not planned or expected after years of hospitals telling me I was infertile and I didn't find out until way after the point that termination was an option.

the leafleting or home working would be the better options but looking at some of the websites it all seems a huge swizz! are there any reputable firms out there that those suggesting it can recommend?

I have at no point said people should charge less or that someone should subsidise my childcare. but there is no getting away from the fact that there is a massive gulf between what nursery a charges compared to nursery b when their services and standards are the same and likewise with CMs. if they want more people in work then something needs to be done to make it more affordable and accessible

younggirl - where have I said he isn't pulling his weight or supportive???? he works nights on long shifts so that he earns a decent wage what more is he supposed to do? he gets 1 day off a week and due to how his shifts fall that day changes every week so I simply cannot work opposite shifts or are you suggesting that I leave my dd in her cot for 8 hours alone and Unsupervised?

If he works nights can you work early mornings before he goes to bed? Cleaning is usually 6-8am. Or you could do bar/ supermarket work at the weekends.

It won't bring in much but more then your Ft less childcare doesn't sound like it would either

But the nurseries charge different rates because they are not the same
Nursery a could be more expensive because they have experienced and highly qualified staff, have organic food cooked by a trained chef, offer extra activities such as football, dance and have extra staff to provide a higher level of care
Nursery b could run to minimum ratios with only half thwcstaff qualified and have a lot of young and inexperienced staff. The food could be all asda smart price cooked by the staff.
Not all nurseries are the same. That's what needs addressing. The early years sector does need more investment I agree but how do we get quality and affordability?

have looked into the cleaning option however he regularly doesn't get in until 8. the nature of his job means he cannot just walk out at the end of his shift, if he is in the middle of something he has to finish or at least get to a point where he can stop. he is the only person who does his job at night so it is all on him so he literally cannot just down tools and leave. I actually cannot remember the last time he actually finished at 6 and came straight home!

our local tesco is hiring for people to pick the online shopping orders but it starts at 5am so would need to be able to leave at about 430, he isn't home for then and although I haven't looked into it I cannot see any cm taking her on at that time of day!

Actually I said "he sounds unwilling to help" because that is the impression you gave when talking about his shift patterns and need to eat and sleep etc. I still don't see how his shift work would prevent you from getting an evening or weekend job. Presumably your child is home and asleep when he comes off a shift? What is to stop you working then? You seem to be making an awful lot of excuses (for him and you) tbh.

And yes, you are expecting others to subsidise you. Expecting the government to "do something" about childcare costs suggests that you expect those costs to be subsidised. You do know that the "government" does not have any money of its own, right?

He works a rotating shift pattern on 12-14 hour nights. he is not an option as he has to sleep that isn't an excuse it is a fact. he does a highly skilled job and cannot be expected to do that without having had sleep. don't be so ridiculous

He may work nights and need to sleep in the day - I do the same but go back to bed say 7/8am for a few hours and then awake 12/1. Could you
Not look for an afternoon job 1-5/6pm. Cafes or children's play centres or even cleaning houses/washing dishes etc

If he doesn't use the gym then cancel it. But you do need treats so his £5
Mag should stay. Cancel exp swimming lesson and take to toddler swim. Most pools have slot times for this every day

Young - he comes in and goes o sleep surely - he won't be looking after the dc then.

Op at 2 often preschools take dc - it can be about £10 for a morning session 9-12 and sometimes they do lunch club till 1 maybe then Dh can get in at 8 and get dc to preschool at 9 hen go home to sleep and you can do some morning work getting dc at "1pm - maybe move to full days 9-3 (£20) if you get more hours and can cope with them?