to even be considering this (private school related)?

[pickledsiblings]

40 minute drive to a Park & Ride

20 minute bus journey

10 minute walk

Would I be insane to consider doing this with my 7 year old as a daily commute/school run (and the reverse journey home again)?

School is a-maz-ing and just 'round the corner from potential new job.

Just wanted to comment on this:

"I can't even imagine getting child plus sports bag plus book bag plus cello plus onto/off of public transport."

DS does this with a bassoon rather than a cello - a bit smaller, similar weight. He has a webbing strap permanently attached to his rucksack which he clips through the handles of all other bags so he can't possibly leave one behind. He has to take two buses with a walk across town in the middle.

He does try to manage things so he doesn't need to carry both bassoon and sports kit on the same day.

He has friends who play the cello and go on public transport.

MamaMed, have looked at the guided bus but not sure we could make it work. My drive into the city takes me past Babraham P&R, Addenbrookes and down Hills Road. Traffic gets congested a bit before the P&R but a lot after. Pity the guided bus didn't go from there.

Like ifink, I too am battle-scarred by the Cambridge commute. I did it from the age of 10 from ten miles away. Mostly by bus, but with some lifts from other parents etc. I used to get the bus at 7.35 and return at 5. I spent the time on the bus calculating how much of my life I was wasting on that bus and given that I was little, it was a huge proportion.

I quickly made friends with the girl who lived closest to school and spent a couple of nights a week there. In many ways I was closer to her parents than to my own.

Mind you, my school (private) was fairly rubbish which didn't help.

Like museumum, it's something that has dictated my whole life and that of my husband. We cycle or walk everywhere and have sacrificed a bigger house in order to do so. I don't know many things about child rearing, but I will never make my child commute more than 40 minutes and even that only at secondary and only with transport that runs regularly and with alternatives.

I would say you won't know for sure until you give it a try, or else you might end up regretting that you never get it a shot. It's a risk but worth trying.

If it doesn't work out, then pull your DC out of the school and back into state school. Give yourself a time frame to see how it works.

Just wondering though, is there a reason why it's just DC3 you want to put into private? Will the other DCs not mind?

TheWordFactory, I find the concept of private education quite baffling, mainly because my experience of it has been that people in my family have paid thousands and thousands for it and then their children have ended up leaving university with similar degrees and going into similar jobs as those who went to state school. So I don't really understand what benefit there is in the long term for all that money spent. But I can understand it easier if there is a local state school which seems to be terrible/fundamentally wrong for a particular child's needs, and there is a local private school which looks amazing. I am struggling a bit to understand the desire to do a horrible commute when there are good local schools that the other children in the family go to. That's why I keep asking what the benefit is, I'm sure there is one I just need it spelt out to me!

HappyYoni, DC already does lots of extras, it's what is lacking in the classroom that is the issue. The whole school experience is just 'richer' in every way. I find the Head of this school to be inspirational in every way.

Pickled, that's a shame! Can you get in to Trumpington Park & Ride easily? There's a guided bus from there to the train station.

Mama, DC1 is well established in an Independent School and DC2 will most likely transfer there for Y7.

Thank you yoni.
Then of course your answer to the dilemma will be clear.

But here's the thing . OP has decided as a sentient adult that she does value what this school offers.

So she has to weigh up the pros and cons.

mama makes a good point about giving it a try.

I'm usually all for that. I certainly bring my DC up to give things a go.

But I'm sure glad it ain't me!

Mama, it's just that bit too far, 1hr without traffic.

I was only asking if op could explain the benefits to me. I thought she might say that her child has a particular interest/talent that this school is really good at developing or something. That would have influenced my opinion/advice.
And to be fair the op came on here asking for views, so she obviously hasn't quite made her mind up and was seeking the opinions of others.

Word, I haven't even thought about how I feel about the commute.

How about you start the job, leave DC where she or he is for now, and see how you alone manage with the commute? Once you have mastered it then consider whether your DC will be able to manage it.

By the sounds of it you are really keen on the job, regardless of everything else. Take the job (who knows, you might be able to go part-time or job share eventually if you wanted to), and then if you decide not to put your DC in private, use that extra money for private coaching, confidence booster sessions, sport etc for all your DCs.

Mama, I'm not sure if I can face the commute without DC3 with me :)

Thank you again for all the comments. I have not yet made a decision. It will be further complicated no doubt when I get the less well paid (if any) of the 2 jobs I'm being considered for. Somehow having a bit of money left over would make the whole thing a bit more palatable. Still, have seen another job at the higher salary that I might be a better fit for so this whole thing could rumble on for another month and I might still end up with nothing. Only upside would be the lack of a monstrous commute .

I wouldn't do it. But things that make help to decide if it would be right for your DC include:

How reliable is the public transport?

How crowded is the public transport?

Will your DC get travel sick from reading in a bus/train/car?

How much homework will your DC get? Will it have to be done at home, or are there facilities to do it at school while you are at work?

Is it likely that your DC will need or want to attend lessons, activities or events before school or at weekends? Will you be able to arrange transport for them?

How will your DC get to school if you are ill/on a work trip or course elsewhere?

Will your DC be able to handle the journey with a chest infection/sprained ankle or other health issue that isn't bad enough to miss school for?

What is the culture around friendship groups at the school? Would it be considered bad form for your DC to visit friends without reciprocating?

Will most other children live near the school, or are longish commutes fairly normal?

Will your distance from the school, or responsibilities to your other children mean that your DC will miss out on some opportunities offered by the school?

At what age will DC be able to do the journey without you?

What will your back up plan be for transport problems?

How will these answers change as DC gets older? Will a teenage DC be able to meet up with friends at weekends?

Will your transport arrangements fit in with getting your other children to school?

Is there the option to move closer to the city or a train station, chose a school for DC2 close to DC3 school and weekly board dc1 at current school?

Moving might involve a much smaller house/sharing rooms/worse area etc and you might be able to release equity to find dc1 boarding. It sounds like you haven't got enough money to have it all.

I have a family member who has made huge sacrifices to get dc great education. I have a lot of respect for that. However I think the kids would have been just as happy at local schools and achieved almost as well (certainly well enough to get the desired next stage).

And also, what would happen if you lost your job?

"I'm not sure if I can face the commute without DC3 with me"

But if he's at a private school, you'll be doing the commute without him for a huge chunk of the year anyway. Eight weeks in the summer, 3-4 at Christmas, the same at Easter...

Oh, so basically you want some company when you commute

Also, TheWordFactory, the fact that it is a private school is almost irrelevant, I would ask exactly the same question if the op was saying 'should I make my child do a massive commute twice a day to go to a fabulous state school'
I would still be asking what are the benefits of that school as opposed to the one nearer?
The fact that it is private is only relevant as far as other opportunities that could be paid for if fees weren't being paid.

petal we looked into the idea of moving but it would cost 2 years school fees just to move.

The worst case scenario (eg if I lost my job) would be that we would have to avail of our local schools which aren't actually that bad, they're just not great.

If it makes a difference, the job comes with 36 days holiday.

Investigating the commute is a good idea. I have used public transport once or twice and there were plenty of school kids on the train.

If you are set on the school and the job, then consider a different commute routine. The park and ride is horrendous (faster to walk often, especially at the end of the day). At the risk of outing myself, I work fulltime at CA and come into the city with DC in a different city centre private school everyday. We make it work by driving in all the way, or doing a driving/cycling mix. There are lockers to store bikes at the park and ride sites, or just put them on a rack on your car. Bikes will beat the bus into town every time.
We get to town by 8am and use breakfast club. That way we don't get stuck in the rest of the school traffic, and I get to stay and finish work earlier, getting out of town before the traffic becomes too manic.
Ask at interview about working hours though. Some departments have certain core hours that must be covered. Also you technically have to wait half a year or a year before applying for flexible working I think, so all before accepting an offer.
Also near in mind that in most departments at CA, summer is the busiest so taking annual leave in the school holidays (june and july) may not be possible, depending on what your specialism is.
Having said that, we make it work and use lots of wraparound care, holiday clubs and rotas with other parents to cover the out of school times.

My preferred commute would be to drive and park nearby, a bit of congestion doesn't bother me too much as I can just listen to the radio/audio stuff. It would be tight getting DC to school on time driving but would be OK if it was just me as could get to the office just after 9am. Could also leave late once traffic had died down. This is what I have done over the past few years when I have been going in and out of the city but I have been lucky enough to have free onsite parking.

Sorry about typos.