to be sick of people telling me how early they wake up when i say dd is an early riser?

[YorkshireTeaGold]

Dd2 (12mths) often wakes at 5. It kills me and I hate it. Am ill all the time, struggling at work, have no social life as go straight to bed and suffer for weeks if I don't. She's an overtired mess so not even happy and I've tried everything to get her to go longer.

Mention why I'm tired to people without young kids (retirees are the worst) and they bang on about how theyre always awake at 5. Even if this is true (fairly sure it's not) theyre not looking after a sobbing baby at this point or spending all day with a baby and a toddler. Sooo aibu to find this really unsympathetic?

Erm, don't all babies scream? When they want to get out of their cot but they're over tired... When you take the magazine from them they ''ve started eating...when they don't want to lie still for a nappy change. Did yours not do this? Are you sure they're ok?

The olnly time my babies cried was when they were ill or had colic. They would cry if I did not attend to their needs of course- but that didn't happen.

It's really tough - I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. I'm (genuinely!) in the same position - 15 month old waking at 4.30/5 for 7 months now. He's unhappy and tired when he wakes. To the poster who says 'don't tell people about it then, it's not a competition' I stopped talking about it as I felt I was a downer for them - it escalated to a period of anxiety where I was unable to work for a week. Sleep deprivation can be really brutal and can affect mental health. People should seek support - not be criticised for ' competing'. Hope it sorts out soon OP. Is your LO still having a morning nap? When DS dropped his things improved

You're a scream, bigblue!!! Byee, I've got work to do and no doubt you've got a business to set up or a triplets to nurse.

Sympathies.

My first child woke between 4-5am for the first 2.5 years of his life. I was a mess. Always knackered, my career suffered, my health suffered, I felt depressed.

But no weirdo ever tried to make out it was all OK, thankfully! Only ever got sympathy from colleagues, friends etc.

Have a bloody great un-MN hug x

That baby is 25 now and still, even after a night on the lash, is up at 7!

Ora - wait till he is a parent!!!! When he starts moaning about "Kids getting him up early" - you can have your moment of triumph then!!!!!!

Oh good god op you are not meeting your babies needs obviously

All my sympathies OP . My 16 mo gets up at 5am. Yesterday she slept until 6.30 and we were in shock. I am so very, very tired most days. Yesterday I walked around the supermarket in a complete haze, putting stuff in the basket without really thinking. Exhaustion doesn't come close to describing how I feel.

I talk about the sleep deprivation a lot with my friends who have kids of the same age - luckily have lots in the same situation as me - to see if they have any tips for me. Childless friends, I mention it in passing but know they don't fully comprehend (understandably so - I had no idea what tiredness meant before I had DD).

I work in an office where the average age is about 24 and babies are a foreign concept to most of my colleagues who spend their weekends partying. When I do mention DD's wake up time they ARE sympathetic though...a few of them have said they'd 'kill themselves' if they had to get up at that time . One day we'll all look back at this time and laugh...I think....

I had a coffee on the train on the way to work this morning and was feeling better, until I read a piece about Thomasina Miers in the Sunday magazine:

"I get up between 6.30 and 7, turn on Radio 4 for 10 minutes, then go down to the kitchen and get Otillie, our 18-month-old, her milk."

AARGH. THAT'S THE DREAM! Can you imagine what a lovely, leisurely way that is to start the day?

My 17mo wakes at 5 too. I hate it! And I am naturally a lark and go to bed early. It's affecting our marriage too tbh.

Ds1 sleeps till 7.30 now he is nearly 4 - I hope ds2 does the same eventually :(

Bigbluestars - you are genuinely one of the most unpleasant people I've ever seen on here. Go and do something else.

thankyou salted. Nice of you to say.

Bigblue - showing a little human kindness and a check on your self-satisfaction would go a long way. Perhaps your approach works well for you in RL

Why the heck are you getting up with her?
Who is the parent here?
Just leave her to cry and eventually (if you stick with it) she will learn that waking up at 5am is pointless.

"you are genuinely one of the most unpleasant people I've ever seen on here. Go and do something else."

salted- and this is a comment from a "kind" person is it? Good that you are showing the way.

Oh hahahahaha that's funny

They're up. So they're up.

And unless you live in a detached house with no neighbours and have no other children who might actually still be asleep, leaving them to cry is completely pointless.

bigbluestars Mon 03-Nov-14 07:09:13
noteven- your neighbours must love you!!

That was actually the post I was referring to. Noteven saying she just made her toddlers do their violin practise...toddlers. How likely do you think that is to be true? She was taking the piss. OF course you were far too busy being sanctimonious to read it properly.

bigbluestars I think you just enjoy winding people up to make yourself feel good! it's deeply unpleasant.

Are you wound up chipping? Not my intention.

I can't leave mine to cry because 1. He shares a room with ds1 2. We live in a tenement and the neighbours would hate me and 3. I think it's cruel.

my sympathies.. really. i have an 8yo with SN who still doesn't sleep... i'm permanently sleep deprived and have been since he was born, it really can be soul destroying.

the only bone i can offer you, is this IS most likely a phase she will grow out of, and if she doesn't, you will eventually get better at coping on less sleep.

i can function on 4hrs now, some nights its less, and ds is usually awake from about 4.30am onwards!

Lots of people stirring the pot on this thread. Might start checking off my bingo card...'it's called 'being a parent' - CHECK; 'who is the parent here?' - CHECK; 'just leave them to cry and they'll learn' - ding, ding, ding, BINGO!!

I was on a thread once where a poster claimed that she would just tell her toddler that she wouldn't tolerate tantrums, and so the toddler never took tantrums. Oh the delightful world of social media, where you can peddle all the bullshit you like

YANBU. I have a thyroid condition, and one of the side effects is early rising. Being jolted awake at 4.30am in a fit of exhaustion and heart racing is horrific, and not in any way comparable to setting your alarm and choosing to wake at that time.

'Oh the delightful world of social media, where you can peddle all the bullshit you like smile'

I think you'll find the advice on this thread pretty standard, not 'bullshit' because it works.The probleem is so many parents are so weak when it comes to their children.

YANBU. For me it is the suddenness of being woken up (5am this morning, I'm ill so was not happy) if you chose to, or naturally wake up early it's a gradual process, crying baby is instant GET UP NOOOOOOOOOOOOW!

That's the killer aspect, being dragged from the world of sleep without the normal waking cycle.