to be sick of people telling me how early they wake up when i say dd is an early riser?

[YorkshireTeaGold]

Dd2 (12mths) often wakes at 5. It kills me and I hate it. Am ill all the time, struggling at work, have no social life as go straight to bed and suffer for weeks if I don't. She's an overtired mess so not even happy and I've tried everything to get her to go longer.

Mention why I'm tired to people without young kids (retirees are the worst) and they bang on about how theyre always awake at 5. Even if this is true (fairly sure it's not) theyre not looking after a sobbing baby at this point or spending all day with a baby and a toddler. Sooo aibu to find this really unsympathetic?

YAsooooooNBU!

Before I had kids I used to regularly get up at 5am. I loved the early morning with no one else about. I could also go for a nap when I got in from work, or in the afternoon at weekends, I wasn't being woken multiple times a night by babies/small children, and I had plenty of opportunities for rest and downtime.

Now I have a two year old and a baby and I would give anything for just ten more minutes in bed. It is sooooo not the same.

Oh, and my dc aren't even particularly early risers! You have my sympathy op.

Yanbu!

My aspie 7yr old goes to bed around 11am and wakes at 4. I am disabled myself and sleep very poorly as it is and at the moment am having a flare up so am very poorly and have been signed off work. The tiredness is awful, I totally sympathise

People have often commented about their own early mornings, the most annoying one being the woman who gets up at 5 to go to the gym and has no dcs

I used to get up at 5 to go to the gym. It was great.
The similarity between that and getting up with my DCs both during the night and at 5am is like that between jelly and a cathedral.

I'm a 'retiree' and I get up between 0430 and 0500...unless I'm festering about something and then it's even earlier. But...I am not struggling with a small child. The early morning is my time to bugger about on the internet, drink strong coffee by the skipload, read my Kindle and otherwise enjoy the quiet.

When the boys were young I needed every last minute of sleep. You have my sympathy OP.

YANBU! I have an earlyish riser (6am generally) and finding that soul destroying. DHgu re me lie ins when he can and that helps.

I have the opposite problem though - childless colleagues at work going 'oh, I was up at 8 / 10' Fuck off!!

I'm with you, OP, I feel insane. DS is a 5am riser and has been since January. I was juuuust about getting used to that, and the fucking clocks changed. He's been up every morning at 4am - surpassing himself this morning with a 3:30am start - and I feel genuinely like I'm going mad. DH on nightshift so isn't around at all. By the time I get to work, I've been up for 5 & a half hours

3.30 SecretBlack?? That really is the middle of the night. Poor you. And OP YANBU.

I used to get up 5.20, throw on my running stuff and go running before work.

Soooo different to now, when I'm forced up by "MUMMY! I WANT YOU".

Ok, so how do you explain this to people without sounding unhinged and bitter (to be fair I'm both)... Both dm and non-dmil do it virtually every time I speak to them. Dm helps with other stuff sometimes and looks after df but mils life is an endless holiday but is totally unsympathetic. I did do (as pps suggested) the whole, oh you could look after them then, thing but strangely enough she backed down sharpish. Still says it every time we see her though as if it's the same!!!! It is indeed like comparing jelly and a cathedral.

secretblack you have my vast sympathy. It will change soon for us I'm sure! X

YANBU!!

You have my sympathies, our DD has never slept through the night and is an early riser also, after years of this and trying everything possible I feel like I am going insane! I am exhausted and it shows - so people tell me I look tired, oh what a lovely feeling that is to add into the mix. If I say she doesn't sleep, my favourite response from said person I have told is "why?" Well, if I knew that I would have the answer to the riddle of universe or second favourite is something along the lines of "really? Our DD slept 12 hours from 4 months old" just what I needed to hear

It's very hard OP, I feel for you.. I can sympathise although not empathise.. As I don't have kids.

I get the other end of the stick where people who have kids don't think that childless people could possibly have unwanted sleepless nights/be continually exhausted... but many people suffer from insomnia/illnesses.. I have a severe chronic condition and have been working full time on 3-4 hrs sleep a night for nearly 20 years.. It's debilitating being continuously tired. I have to sleep sitting up too now which I hate :(

We all have battles to bear. I hope yours is over sooner rather than later x

YANBU, there is a world of difference between waking up at the crack of dawn & being woken up. But I doubt you will ever get them to realise this.
There is also an element of competition to it, DM is constantly telling me what time she was up -retired, does nothing but potter about until bedtime, with the odd nap thrown in. Am not bitter about that (honest) she is 84, but does not grasp that dd leaping up at what I would consider middle of the night & ready for day ahead can be slightly draining.
But hurrah, did manage to out do her "I was awake at 4.30am today" with a Ha! We were up at 2.30 (thank you dd2 who eventually fell asleep in our bed leaving me wide awake & dh roaming house) - was almost worth it. Almost.

Oh and just to add, odd mil was constantly berating us for wasting our time & not getting up of a morning as she was always up by at least 5am ( and usually hoovering when I used to stop over pre-DC). And Dh used to take it & sometimes even agree with her until I pointed out she went to bed at 5pm, 6pm at the very latest, so was in bed a good 12 hours a "night". Waaaaay more than most adults, but, like I said, she is odd.

Yanbu. I developed a deep and passionate hatred of that hour 5-6am. Any time starting with a 6 I could cope with, but earlier than that still makes me want to cry!

Hang in there, it gets better honest.

Anybody who says anything along the lines of "Oh getting up any later than 5 am is a waste of the day!" risks getting punched in the tits.

I get so fucking ragey about this and I dont even need to deal with it anymore! Waking out of choice, or even necessity for work, is totally different to hearing that noise. You know the one, the quiet whinging that wakes you up and you hold your breath whilst hoping they drop off again, knowing that they wont.

YY to comparing Jelly to a Cathedral, I love that phrase!

YAB (a bit)U...they are just telling you their situation just like you told them yours...I had a child that did not sleep and still doesn't, such is life but I feel your pain x

Mistress I think the issue isnt people saying "Oh I have that too, isnt it horrendous" but people who seem to think that getting up for the day at 3am deserves some sort of medal! "Oh I like to make the most of the day!" Really? Is that why you go to bed at 6pm?

Its the implication that you are somehow lacking if you cant leap out of bed with a smile and a song at 4:30 that grates!

When my babies 3 under 3 were small I worked till 1-2 am 5 nights a week no way I could get up at 5 I don't know how U do it! anything before 7 was out the question here

I should add that my mother used to do this and would say "Well go to bed earlier then!" when I said I was tired. What she conveniently forgot was that at the time I was working evenings in a pub so midnight was early for me! Easy to go to bed at 8pm when you have nothing worth staying up for!

YANBU. Why can't they give you a bit of support and maybe even say something helpful? Sleep deprivation is a serious matter! Does anyone remember the CBeebies show called Boo? There was a character called Sleeping Bear who was always yawning and settling down for a "nice nap". I used to feel physically sick when Sleeping Bear came on, because I was so tired and longing for sleep. Wish I could think of some helpful tips for you. I do look back and wonder why I didn't just eat more chocolate to help ease the pain.

It's still just how they feel..which is cool...they are arse-holes but they are still entitled to be so..

I don't mind people telling me about their routines, if they choose to get up at 5 that's their business. Its people (I know a lot of them and golightly has just reminded me how much I hate it) who insinuate that it is somehow my own fault for putting up with it. I have work colleagues who say things like "have you tried a gro clock/big tea/magic wand" and my mum who insists that going to her in the night when she wakes has created this problem. And particularly a friend who used to say (before she got her own early riser in DC2) "I wouldn't put up with that" like I have a choice.
I have every sympathy with people like my DGM and touchofnatural who suffer with insomnia and health problems which similarly interrupt their sleep.

YY supermumtum

Yanbu. I am an early riser but now my youngest child is 8 it's a choice and I feel fine. When he was 12 months I was so exhausted I can hardly even remember that phase of life. Totally different.

Ughh DS tried to get up at 3am today but I calpol-ed and boobed him (he's teething - the big back molars) and it worked! Just on and off whinging from 3:30am till he gave me barrels at 5:15am. But his nappy had leaked so fair enough.

Golightly we aren't choosing to get up at these times. Saying 'oh I couldn't do that' just drives me mad. I can't do it either, I just have no fucking option! I'm deranged with exhaustion, constantly ill, and no one else around to help - not at night anyway.

The other one I hate which I see on here all the time is 'oh no I can't get up with the baby before 8am. I need my sleep too much tee hee hee!'