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to be completely confused - pro/anti choice

345 replies

ScarletFever · 28/10/2014 12:49

I have ALWAYS considered myself pro-choice

and then this - remember that person Josie who is on the daily mail a lot, with her nhs boob job etc who has made a career of annoying people... who said

"i would have aborted my baby if it meant i could go on Big Brother"

Right - so I was like "oh you evil cow" etc......, but then it was pointed out somewhere, if you are pro-choice, then what difference does it mean if her reason is crap?

So, how do i get my head around it being 'ok to abort a disabled child, or if you are not ready for children, or even it is the wrong time (re career) to have a child' but not ok to abort a child for a 'celebrity' reason??

OP posts:
Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 13:57

So women should not be allowed to have repeated abortions?

If you think you're fertile from around the age of 13 to say 53, that's 40 years, that is a lot of time for a woman to be in different situations where she needs to access an abortion.

As I say it depends how you view an abortion, if you think it's wrong but ok in desperation then you would take that viewpoint. If you think it's a simple medical procedure then you would accept the woman's choice.

weeder · 28/10/2014 13:58

Not sure where going on the telly fits in to these guidelines from the NHS

to be completely confused - pro/anti choice
WalkingInMemphis · 28/10/2014 14:01

Not sure where going on the telly fits in to these guidelines from the NHS

Weeder...if all we were talking about were the legalities of abortion there is no debate at all. We all know legally what the situation is.

That's not what the thread is about though, is it?

PeggyCarter · 28/10/2014 14:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

weeder · 28/10/2014 14:03

Kind of is - Looks like 'I want an abortion cos I want to go on Big Brother' isn't an available option.

Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 14:03

But I don't think that an abortion is ever going to be less effort than taking a pill.

Cases of repeated abortions for so called trivial or callous reasons are probably very rare.

Considering what a doctor has to put on the paperwork it's likely we will never know the true reasons.

However as I say it shouldn't come down to what type of woman is worthy of an abortion.

Mammanat222 · 28/10/2014 14:04

Repeat abortions are my personal grey area.

(for the third time now)

I freely admit that there are areas I am not completely comfortable with however despite that I still 100% support choice.

differentnameforthis · 28/10/2014 14:06

By callous, I mean (for ex.) someone who wouldn't bother using contraception because terminating an unwanted pregnancy would be less effort for them than popping a pill every morning

That probably counts for a such a tiny amount of terminations, and wouldn't you think that someone who would rather put them selves through the trauma of a termination rather then take a pill every day, needs a little more help, rather than condemnation?

SaucyJackOLantern · 28/10/2014 14:06

And before anyone says so, yes obviously I think the same about men who think getting an abortion is less effort than wearing a condom.

differentnameforthis · 28/10/2014 14:07

*than

Momagain1 · 28/10/2014 14:10

What you would call a 'celebrity' reason would be a career reason for her and her choice as valid as a woman wanting to avoid morning sickness or due date during a crucial part of graduate or professional school.

Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 14:12

Why should she learn her lesson after the first time? I can't really understand why if you're pro choice, believe a termination is a medical procedure accessible by all, and accept that women have a diverse range of circumstances where they may need to access one, then I can't see why a repeat abortion would be a grey area.

As for going on big brother as a reason. There will be plenty of women who ask for abortions because they can't cope with a baby and their career at that point in time, meaning that a baby would be detrimental.

"I'm a waitress and a barmaid, I work long hours, I couldn't manage those hours with a baby, so having the baby would mean I'd have to leave my job and have no money"

Most people would accept the above reason, but not Josie Cunninghams.

TheWholeOfTheSpook · 28/10/2014 14:15

I found out I was pg at Uni. My initial reaction was to have an abortion. Whatever the law states, it was very easy to organise, even when we found out I was much further on than we thought. As it was, I decided at the last minute to keep him.

Mammanat222 · 28/10/2014 14:19

"Why should she learn her lesson after the first time? I can't really understand why if you're pro choice, believe a termination is a medical procedure accessible by all, and accept that women have a diverse range of circumstances where they may need to access one, then I can't see why a repeat abortion would be a grey area."

With all due respect it is MY grey area and I have no idea why some people seem to be jumping on this like I am at fault?

Like someone said in post #3 or so just because you don't agree with someone's reasoning doesn't mean you want to outlaw abortion!

I think 37% being a second (or more!!!) abortion is actually an incredibly high rate, higher than I though [I actually have the 2013 England and Wales abortion stat's in front of me]

Just because I don't like the idea of a woman having 3, 4, 5 abortions - and lets face it - it's a pretty grim thing for a woman to go through even once - doesn't mean I do not support choice.

minipie · 28/10/2014 14:20

Because if that's the way she feels, then clearly having a baby is not very important to her and she's not ready for motherhood.

Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 14:21

The way I see it you're pro choice or you're not.

You can think that someone such as Josie Cunningham leads an irresponsible and chaotic life. But if you're pro choice you accept a woman's right to access an abortion.

On the subject of repeat abortions, let's say fit example, woman of 35 has her second abortion. First time she was 16 and her boyfriend left a condom inside her without her realising (this actually happened to someone I know), and she became pregnant. Second time she's married, baby planned, then she finds out her husband is having an affair, he's gambled loads of money and they're about to lose their home, she doesn't work and relies on husband income but he's gambled everything away, she has a mini breakdown and ends up back living with her elderly parents.

These things really happen in people's lives over the 40 years that they're fertile.

FreudiansSlipper · 28/10/2014 14:23

There is no grey area you are either pro choice or you are not

What you feel you could do is irrelevant bit putting any restrictions on the choice for other women is not being pro choice. It is a stance that can question our morals at times but that is or own personal beliefs

Pro life is just that too where there is no other choice for the woman

Many sit in the middle but being pro choice unless ... is not being pro choice at all

sickntiredtoo · 28/10/2014 14:24

I think abortions should be banned in all but a very few circumstances.
I regard a human life as being created at the moment of fertilisation, wher a genetically unique potential human being is created

DioneTheDiabolist · 28/10/2014 14:24

Nothing is failsafe, no system is perfect, there will always be people who use laws and systems in ways others disapprove of.

I accept this and remain Pro Choice.

Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 14:26

I'm only discussing with you and putting forward different viewpoints. It doesn't mean you're not entitled to your thoughts feelings and opinions, but I'm using this discussion board to voice mine.

It would be boring if we all agreed to disagree.

Pyjamaramadrama · 28/10/2014 14:29

Sickntired too it's all very well taking that stance but are you going to look after all these babies when they're born and their parents can't cope, have no means to care for them or just don't want them?

Abortion is the more humane option.

jellybelly701 · 28/10/2014 14:30

I understand what you mean OP. I am pro-choice but a few times now I have had to question my stance on it. For example a family 'friend' got pregnant aged 18 and had an abortion after getting pregnant from a one night stand. The very next day after her after abortion she was sucking the face off a random guy in the pub. Two months later she fell pregnant again and had another abortion. A few months after that she had another.
She said she didn't like the feel of condoms and taking the pill was too much hassle.

Now I have a problem with that because if you know that you are in no position to have a child then you should do all you can to prevent an unwanted pregnancy. Fair enough being caught out once or even twice. but three times in less than a year? It's just irresponsible. with that said I still don't think she should have been forced to continue the pregnancy(s)

SaucyJackOLantern · 28/10/2014 14:33

"wouldn't you think that someone who would rather put them selves through the trauma of a termination rather then take a pill every day, needs a little more help, rather than condemnation?"

Help with what exactly? Just because I might privately think that someone is a dick and living their life in a manner I don't personally approve of, it does not at all follow that they need psychiatric help. Using abortions as contraception or getting repeat abortions are both perfectly legal, and I respect any woman's right to make that choice- even if I don't respect the choice itself.

sashh · 28/10/2014 14:34

I would be completely pro-choice about someone aborting because they were raped. Or because of medical reasons. Or they were very young.

I don't get the 'it's OK if she was raped' - it is impossible to police, it takes longer than 9 months to bring someone to trial and that is if you know who it is and there is strong evidence.

I support a charity that brings Irish women to the UK for abortions (including those from NI) a significant minority have been raped but will not report it because that would mean they could not get an abortion.

I think 37% being a second (or more!!!) abortion is actually an incredibly high rate, higher than I though [I actually have the 2013 England and Wales abortion stat's in front of me]

But some women do tent to get pregnant at the drop of a hat, if you are particularly fertile you may well need 2 or 3.

MaidOfStars · 28/10/2014 14:35

I think abortions should be banned in all but a very few circumstances

So you're pro-choice. Excellent.

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