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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Did I over or under react?

125 replies

Beautifulbabyboy · 22/10/2014 10:17

So, just driving down the road with my 1 year old in the car. A red car pulls out in front of me, and proceeds to drive down the road on the completely wrong side, swerving everywhere. I mean really swerving, far worse than if you jare just glancing at your phone. She was properly on the wrong side. Fortunately no cars coming in opposite direction, which is rare as this is the main road into a small town. This goes on for about .5 of a mile. I actually start to get scared for the driver, as it is so bad. Approaching the town is a roundabout. The red car then proceeds to mount the roundabout with front and back right wheels.

At this point I think oh my god. Pull on my hand break and jump out. The woman has her phone in her hand and 2 babies (can't be more than 3) in the back. There is also a can of Stella in the passenger door. She looked awful.

I put on my Jo frost super nanny low stern voice, usually reserved for putting my kids on the naughty step, and said. "What on earth do you think you are doing, you were so dangerous you could harm yourself, your babies, others" I don't know if she was drunk, she was definitely on her phone. She was quite defensive at first, then apologetic and said she hasd been up all night and was very tired. So I said she had to go straight home, put the kids in front of the TV and rest, because she was a danger in her current state.

She came down off the kerb then drove off straight through a red light..... Feeling awful now .....so mumsnet should I a) not have said or done anything b) taken the registration and called the police c) offered to follow her home to make sure she got there safely.... Just worried for her babies...

OP posts:
RightyTightyLeftyLoosey · 22/10/2014 10:40

I would still call the police, explain you weren't sure but now you think it needs investigating. They can possibly check cctv. I would hardly ever do so but dangerous and probably drunk driving with children in the car, that's just horribly frightening!
This woman probably needs help, and this might be the wake up call she needs.

WorraLiberty · 22/10/2014 10:44

Should I have taken the reg plate? Would the police have been interested?

Christ on a bike....

titchy · 22/10/2014 10:48

Sorry but you totally under-reacted....

MidniteScribbler · 22/10/2014 10:52

Good lord OP!! Are you for real? You let an (allegedly) drunk and dangerous driver back on the road with two babies in the car. Now you think that soft play with your 1 year old is more important than calling the police. What planet do you live on?

Bailey101 · 22/10/2014 10:54

I really do wonder what goes on in some peoples heads........... Confused

PrivatePike · 22/10/2014 10:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LurkingHusband · 22/10/2014 10:55

Maybe because I'm a man, but I would have tried to take the keys out of the ignition (if possible) and called the police. Not sure of the legalities but there is a defence of necessity to prevent harm to yourself or others. Failing that, try to block the car in ... and CALL THE POLICE. If this woman is a drunk driver, she's (not) in control of a 2-tonne killing machine.

PrivatePike · 22/10/2014 10:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 22/10/2014 10:56

This thread is ridiculous.

pictish · 22/10/2014 10:57

O would've called the police too...for the simple fact that she was in danger of killing or injuring not only herself and her children, but other innocent people too.

KatoPotato · 22/10/2014 10:58

Good grief. Unbelievable.

Beautifulbabyboy · 22/10/2014 10:58

Just called the community officer. She said thanks for the info, and will look into it, but she did say a reg plate would have helped. Feeling like an idiot now. Just all happened so fast.

OP posts:
Beautifulbabyboy · 22/10/2014 10:59

Why pebble?

OP posts:
Ujjayi · 22/10/2014 11:00

Agree with LurkingHusband, I would have opened driver's door & tried to get keys. At the very least, I would have called police immediately.

The welfare & safety of all involved is more important than your dc's softplay session.

Ridiculous.

pictish · 22/10/2014 11:01

Yes the police would be very interested in a driver so drunk they drive up the wrong side of the road with kids in the car.

MidniteScribbler · 22/10/2014 11:04

What on earth did you think was going to happen here? That people would pay you on the back and say 'well done for using your mummy voice. She'll realise the error of her ways. Your tough words rendered her instantly sober and safe to be on the road.'?

MidniteScribbler · 22/10/2014 11:05

'Pat' not 'pay'.

Beautifulbabyboy · 22/10/2014 11:07

At the time I was NOT thinking about soft play, i was thinking sh"t what am I supposed to do... I don't know if she was drunk, I just know she was driving absolutely horrendously. the phone was in her hand and there was a can of Stella in the car. For all I know she may just have been as tired as she said... In which case what the police have said if I had forced my way into the car and grabbed her keys?!?!?!

OP posts:
TheWitTank · 22/10/2014 11:08

You definitely under reacted. You should have called the police immediately and taken her keys. My sister has removed the keys from a vehicle before as the man was blind drunk and about to take his children home from school. It sounds like she was very dangerously drunk/tired and drinking more whilst driving (!) and could have caused a major accident.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 22/10/2014 11:08

Why? Because (like everyone else) I find it unbelievable that you didn't do anything. It's so ridiculous I'm wondering if it's real.

Beautifulbabyboy · 22/10/2014 11:09

I actually thought maybe I had just seen a small snap shot of someone's life and and had judged her wrongly. And that interfering when you don't know the actual facts is wrong... Hence my did I over or under react?!?

OP posts:
famalam · 22/10/2014 11:09

If someone mounts a roundabout after swerving all over the road, they are not in a fit state to go any further and definately warrant the taking of the car keys.

TheFairyCaravan · 22/10/2014 11:11

I agree with Pobble!

You've just seen a woman mount a roundabout, after driving erratically, for at least half a mile. She had a can of Stella in the door and you used a "Jo Frost voice!" Hmm.

Words absolutely fucking fail me! Let's hope she doesn't mount the pavement and kill someone!

pictish · 22/10/2014 11:12

Stop beating on the OP now folks.

ClapHandsIfYouBelieveInFatties · 22/10/2014 11:12

how is swerving all over the road with alcohol in the car "a small snapshot" and why don't you call the police NOW!? You don't need to wait till your baby is asleep. That wait could be the time where someone is killed. A child. A PERSON.