To wonder if I should tell him?

[ThisIsAnAwkwardSituation]

This is embarrassing but here it goes.

I'm 25 years old and have never had sex. This sounds childish and immature but never really been interested and didn't feel ready.

However I have been seeing someone for about a month now and things are getting serious. I would like to do it now, but I'm just confused about whether I'm supposed to tell him about my lack of experience? And more to the point, how do I tell him? Does it really matter if I don't tell him?

He is four years older than me and from what I've gathered very experienced so I think I'm going to feel childish.

I was thinking about not telling him and just going for it. Good idea or not?

Save your virginity and run for your life.

Oh god, is the first lose-your-virginity live thread?

OP, I hope that your partner was just shocked and not sure how to react, and that he gets himself together and realises what a privilege he has.

BUT you know you don't have to do it if you don't want to. And if he won't wait, he doesn't deserve you.

"soon have it popped"?!

Hope you're having a fab time right now OP! Hope he came back with champagne and condoms

unmmmm OP do you actually want to do it tonight?

OP you can back out

If anything would put me off, it would be a comment like that. How dismissive and childish. It sounds like he'd say whilst running his hands together. Even more offputting than someone wearing white pants.

OP Don't do it with him, really don't. You have waited until you are ready, which is good, but this guy is a twat - I would put money on you regretting having done it with him if you do.

I wouldn't expect a comment like that from a boy of 15, let alone a man of 29. It's disrespectful and coarse. It's just 'ick'.

You will just be a notch on his bedpost with a double tick for 'had a cherry'. urgh.

Urgh.

Really, stop drinking, send him home - find a nice bloke.

Oh and no, I'm not saying sex should all be hearts & flowers, that would be hugely hypercritical it can be a lot of fun and a lot of other things with different people... but do you really want your first time to be with some bloke who is treating you like 'a given' and 'a cherry to get popped'.

What Chipping just said. I can't believe he said that to you. Massively disrespectful. He should have been reassuring you and saying how there was no rush. FWIW my current DH waited 6 months with a previous girlfriend who was a virgin.

The OP has successfully been opting not to have sex she doesn't fancy having for 25 years up till now, how about we all just trust her judgement .

The OP has successfully been opting not to have sex she doesn't fancy having for 25 years up till now

That's probably not true. As a conscious effort, I hope it's closer to ten years...

But point taken.

Oh right, good point! Sorry, on the

OP WHATS HAPPENING NOW!

Nothing worse than when you're reading a really good thread and you get to the end

Best of luck op, I'm interested to find out what has happened.
I agree the cherry popping comment was icky but hopefully he said it and then thought "oh god why did I say that?!?! I must go buy her champagne and spoil her to make her first time a nice memory"

Okay so the cherry popping comment was a bit but I'll put it down to him being nervous and not knowing how to react. Hopefully he'll be kicking himself about it now so I'll try not to be too harsh on him.

But seriously OP, update us please! Tell us what's happening! I have my own wine ready.

I wonder if this could be the first losing your virginity live thread?

Even though I'm sure you've probably made your decision already please don't do this if you don't want to. Good luck whatever you decide to do just please tell us .

I really hope he's gone to the shop for something nice like a bottle of champagne and not just condoms. And that OP comes back with a tale of much woo-ing and romance.

It's making me kinda regret losing my virginity purely because I thought it was something I ought to have done. My first time was rather mechanical, and about as erotic as erecting flat pack furniture.

Here's another vote for a big bottle of and just bluff if! Have fun

Oooh see I hate romantic sex. If men kept lighting candles and stroking me i'd still be a virgin. Marian Keyes calls it being a 'feathery stroker'

I think the idea of "popping" anything would put me right off.

Actually, secret I kinda get what you mean. DH went to a really big effort one valentines day, candles, soft music like a soundtrack to a German porno and rose petals on the sheets.

My first thought was 'who's going to clean all this up?'...

It's just never like the movies, is it?

secret is there anyone out there. Love that book. Hate that old shite too. I do hope OP's ok and he's bought something nice for her

Not a fan of romantic sex either, it puts far too much pressure on you to "perform". An ex BF went the whole hog once when we were away for the weekend, I was knackered after a days sightseeing and while I was not averse to the idea of cosy bonk, I really was not up for the sexual gymnastics that the situation called for. It was quite funny in the end, a little while into it he rather shame facedly said "It isnt really working for me, I think I must be too tired" and I replied with "Thank fuck for that! shall we just go to sleep?" which we did :o

A good relationship to me is one where you can say "I am too knackered for mucking about, can we just "do it" and go to sleep? I love you!"

Hope OP's having fun.

what did he buy from the shop? WHAT DID HE BUY FROM THE SHOP!!!!!

ClashCity Rocker, for shame!

I really love putting together flat-pack furniture. Especially when I get to say words like "erect" and "screw". Really, got loads of potential for perviness.

Allen Key! Fwoooaarrr >faints