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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To want to tell this woman to fuck right off

133 replies

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 18:03

I grant I am cold and wet and not in the best spirits. However I seem to have a habit of attracting annoying folk whilst going about my business.

Just now- standing at bus stop- no room in shelter so standing in rain. Check the bus times on my phone. An older lady eagerly catches my eye and asks when the 249 comes. I tell her it says 8 minutes. Then she says, what about the 432? I say it says two mins. Go back to listening to music on my phone. She catches my eye again- I stop music just so she can point out that it's been a "long two minutes", looking at me as if I have any control over the buses whatsoever. I check the times again- and tell her now the 249 says four minutes, the 432 says 11. She crossly tells me "so your information isn't infallible then?!". Well obviously not you stupid woman, have you never taken a bus in South London before? Instead I say "no- they often change". Then the 432 comes, she isn't paying attention. So I tap her and point out the bus. She snarls at me "well it's the 249 I really need". Then glares at me.

Honestly.

Why do I bother?!

OP posts:
Laquitar · 13/10/2014 22:52

Oh your op made me laugh. Especially when she said she doesnt need this bus!!

Although i must say that Fizzy's post was even funnier. I like how whatever you post someone will call you 'ageist' or 'sexist' or smth!

Oh and then the typo! This thread is very funny.

Pipbin · 13/10/2014 22:52

So you were berated for not being infallible?
You are the Pope and I claim my £5

vezzie · 13/10/2014 22:53

If you were standing at the bus stop I think you were standing at: once I waited there so long that I was forced to cross the road to use the loo in the noodle bar. but my need didn't seem that desperate when I heard desperate groaning from a cubicle and realised I was about to put my sandalled bare foot in a huge human turd. I turned around and ran away.

Many times I walked miles back when no trains were running and the A23 was so jam packed that taxis wouldn't even attempt to go that way. One time I walked it in the snow with SPD and it took me so long my brain shifted gear and I started to believe that this was my life now.

I feel your pain and I would have been very tempted to tell her to fuck right off.

On the upside I have got on many crowded buses with babies and toddlers in that neck of the woods and found myself suddenly seated, with my children, the pushchair neatly folded in the luggage rack, and lots of people smiling approvingly at me

Darquesse · 13/10/2014 22:58

Oh dear lord, how are you getting a hard time here! Next time wear sunglasses with your ear phones and there will be no eye contact and you can ignore everyone and avoid rude demanding people.

scaevola · 13/10/2014 22:59

A person gratuitously spoke to you in th vicinity of public transport in London?

Be afraid, OP; run far, run fast.

vezzie · 13/10/2014 22:59

Pipbin - presumably the OP replied in a frosty tone "I was not speaking ex cathedra"

AnnieLobeseder · 13/10/2014 22:59

WTAF, fuzzy, you think the OP was rude for daring to be using her own phone and listening to music while a random woman (of irrelevant age) demanded information from her and then criticised her when it wasn't correct? Seriously? Using phones/earphones when you are on your own in public is not remotely rude, why would you think it is? Why should the OP interact with a random stranger who wants to talk to her? Why is her peace and privacy less important than the desire of the woman to know the bus schedule? And why was it the OP's responsibility to provide it?

OP, you were more than civil, the woman was a grumpy arse (of irrelevant age) and, like many posters on this thread, clearly slightly unhinged.

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:02

Ha ha, juju, that really made me chuckle!

Fizzy would have quite the culture shock if she was ever thrown into Anerley at rush hour in the rain and tried to chat to people at the bus stop!

And yes- can't do anything without being accused of practicing some sort of ism or another. I suppose I should not mention that she (whispers) had an accent.

OP posts:
grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:04

Also- vezzie, not sure it's the same stop? This one is across from a major station / park / football club and next to a little tesco? Don't think I have ever seen a noodle bar (but will avoid if I do!! Yuck!!!)

OP posts:
vezzie · 13/10/2014 23:05

ok I think I was imagining you going in the other direction, from a tube station

iwasyoungonce · 13/10/2014 23:08

This thread is hilarious!

A perfectly understandable moan about an unreasonable woman at a bus stop, and the OP has been accused of:

having nothing more important to worry about
being rude for listening to listening to music on her phone
being ageist

Absolutely insane!

Grin

P.S. OP I think you sound lovely. Thanks

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:08

Annie- hear hear! Thank you, and well said.

I don't know how to give you a martini glass because I am on your phone, so I will draw you one instead!

\ /
/
I
I
I

Okay that sucks- but the thought is there

OP posts:
ElephantsNeverForgive · 13/10/2014 23:09

Another delight of country living, you can't have bus rage, we don't have any!

Although I have rung the council with school bus rage. They were great and promised to remind the contractor what they were paid for if they tried to miss us out again!

fizzymittens · 13/10/2014 23:09

Annie um, calm down. If you had read the thread you would see that the OP fully convinced me that this woman had been rude and that actually on balance I agreed with her after she had explained things to me. The OP, however, was polite and did not rant at me unlike you.

My apologies to those of you who can't cope with the fact that I don't use public transport. We all live different lives though don't we?

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:10

Vezzie - now I am curious! I don't think there are any tube stops around? Oh maybe on the clapham side actually... I was getting on in the anerley area.

And Iwasyoungonce- I know right? Was supposed to be anecdotal and humorous. It has turned out to be humorous but for very different reasons!

OP posts:
grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:15

Pipbin- I should have told her that for an infallible service, she needed to look a good deal higher up than my measly 5 feet 3 inches!! I can barely manage my outlook calendar let alone the London bus system. In fact it's a wonder I have even managed to work out the texting system...

OP posts:
vezzie · 13/10/2014 23:16

I meant I thought you were going there from Brixton, where you got off the tube and waited for the bus! And if you ever do do that, yes, definitely avoid the noodle place.

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:17

Elephants- I think in know what you mean. My ILs live in the country and my MIL gets noticeably agitated every morning around 9 and every afternoon around 4. Turns out this is when the bus comes-- and she listens to make sure it's on time. Naturally she does not take the bus and has absolutely no vested interest in whether it is on time or not. But she knows, dammit!

OP posts:
grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:19

Vezzie- ah yes I know where you mean! And will do.

The tapas restaurant in the crypt nearby there is good, though! Service a bit slow but very nice inside.

Is it allowed to hijack my own thread to talk about tapas?

OP posts:
PinkSquash · 13/10/2014 23:21

Buses do seem to bring out the fool in people, like those who shove kids out of the way to get on first.

London buses do bring out a certain side of people that only Londoners have.

grumpasaur · 13/10/2014 23:33

Pink Squash- don't they just!!

Heading to bed now- will dream of limousines and lovely open roads.

Or maybe just sexy men on horseback, waiting to gallop me from door to door :-)

Night all!

OP posts:
giraffescantboogie · 13/10/2014 23:34

whatever you post in AIBU will be pulled to pieces OP

mimishimmi · 14/10/2014 04:11

Some elderly people seem to get very annoyed with me when I'm on my phone. They seem to think that I ought to be more interested in letting them strike up a conversation with me. I doubt she was even really concerned about the bus times.

TheRealAmandaClarke · 14/10/2014 04:28

I call "ageist" on this OP.

Political correctness gone mad? You can't say anything these days? It was just a description?

Unnecessary description. IMO one of the many casual and insidious comments made against the elderly.
Usually against post menopausal women. Ageist and sexist.

Telling us this was " older lady" carries the veneer of respectability (use of lady, what a polite term) but really just means "old woman".
Older than what?

Substitute the word "black" (or any other minority ethnic description) and its more obvious that its a discriminatory remark.

AnonyMust · 14/10/2014 05:20

Punching work lady and queen incident. Lolling