To think that 9.30pm is too late to bang on the door for a parcel

[ScrambledEggAndToast]

I took in a parcel for a neighbour yesterday and she came round at 9.30pm to collect it. She knocked and I ignored it at first as I was in my pyjamas, she then started bashing on the letter box which set off the dog and woke up DS. I did then open it and gave it to her but fold her I thought it was too late. The dog then didn't calm down for 15 minutes and my son didn't get back to sleep for ages.

What do you reckon, is 9.30 too late on a weekday?

one would expect at least one adult in a household to be up still at 9:30, or at the very least awake.

One wouldn't if the lights were all off and there was no sound.

Well as Op has said, she won't be taking any more parcels in!

I think that the rudeness came from the insistent banging when she wasn't answered initially.

If she works long hours, perhaps she should have stuff delivered to work or have a post box?

I am amazed there there are only a couple of posters where it actually occurs to them to take the parcel round when the neighbours come home rather than waiting for them to call round for it.

We live in a cul-de-sac with only 4 houses. We take parcels in for each other all the time. We also take them round to the neighbour when they get home. It is just considerate to do so isn't it?

For the record, I wouldn't knock on a neighbour's door at 9.30 for a parcel.

If you happen to notice when a neighbour gets home it's lovely to take the parcel around.

Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't!

i doubt it's that it doesn't occur to people to do it!

If I notice the neighbours are home I send one of my minions round with it take it round if it's convenient for me. They don't always have a "while you were out" card pushed through their door so it makes sense.

Bun on longer streets parcels get left for people out of sight of your door - would you go out every half hour and walk down the street? We take parcels over sometimes, esp. for people we know the likely movements of, but sometimes large and awkward parcels are left and you cannot tell whether people are actually in (they have more than 1 car, don't park on their drive and you don't know if one on the road is theirs, they left the car at home... Etc.). Its a royal pain in the bum to beother ppeople's delivery service in some circumstances!

I recently took in a parcel for a neighbour. It slipped my mind during the evening, so I didn't check for their car on their drive until about 9.30pm - and by that time, there were no lights on in their house - and it didn't even occur to me to go over and hammer on the door until they got up and answered.

Yes, it was early for all the lights to be off, but to me, the lights being off made it clear that they were asleep or trying to get to sleep - and it would be very rude indeed to go and knock.

PiratePanda, insancerre and twofingers - it must have been obvious to the woman knocking that no-one was up - all the lights were off - so why wasn't it rude for her to knock - and keep knocking - under those circumstances?

I don't think it's necessarily too late to knock (maybe she was working late and the parcel was urgent) but it is too late to start loudly bashing on the letter box when she didn't initially get a response, which should have indicated to her that no one was available.

Not to mention the fact that the entire house was in darkness - even if the parcel was urgent (unless it was something medically vital), she shouldn't have knocked, imo.

I work 14 hour shifts. Would you rather I knocked at 7am?

Yes, I do think it's too late. A new neighbour took in a parcel for me a while ago, and then were not in for days/weekends on end. Eventually I had to start going round at 10pm to get my parcel. I made a mental note to not take any parcels in for them, as they would be expecting me to answer the door late at night.

7am would be fine windchime!

7.00am would not be fine!!
3/4s of the house are still in bed and 1/4 would be in the shower (for the next 20 mins!)

Continuing from my last post..... if neighbors came round regarding a parcel at 7.00am I would be grateful that they were dropping it off for me or that the parcel was gone. It would be a roll of my eyes and a huff sort of inconvenience tbh.

Windchime - would you hammer on the door of a house that was in total darkness?

If someone works 12 hour shifts and order things to be delivered to their home, the chances are that their goods will arrive whilst they are at work, so are they assuming that their neighbours are going to be happy to take in the deliveries. If they are happy to do this, isn't it in the person's interests to make sure they stay happy to take in parcels - and waking the whole house up,when they are in bed isn't going to make the neighbours happy! is it?

No, its not that late. After 10:00 pm may be a bit late and after 11:00 pm is definitely too late.

This business of taking in neighbours' parcels is interesting to me.

Here in Aus, the postie/courier wouldn't even consider knocking on a neighbour's door if you weren't in. They stick a card in your box with details of the delivery (item type, time etc.) and that it's being held at the nearest delivery centre. Leaving it with the neighbours is just not done!

(By 'delivery centre', I mean the closest Australia Post branch.)

It isn't as much about the time per se, as the fact that the all the lights were off when the neighbour knocked on the door and kept on hammering.

Surely, if it's after dark, and a house has no lights on, at is a pretty clear indication that the occupants have gone to bed - in which case it doesn't matter if you think it is way too early for bed, it is rude to knock and get them up?

Perhaps the OP's question should have been, "AIBU to think it was rude of the neighbour to hammer in the door for her parcel, when our lights were all off, indicating we were all in bed?"

I don't mind taking in parcels but I'm not going to go out knocking on doors to give it them. They come.to me.

Whether 9.30pm is too late I would say it's borderline. I'd probably go around until 9pm but not later. But knocking when lights were off is very wrong and bashing on letterbox when initial knock wasn't answered is very unfair.

Its really nobody's business to decree what too late is - but sensible people don't deliberately wake people who are doing them a favour which they may need a repeat of - and this neighbour deliberately woke the OP by creating a lot of noise bashing the letterbox of a darkened house when her knock wasn't answered.

Some people may haughtily decree that adults don't go to bed/ sleep before 11pm because that is what they do (and obviously everyone is the same, otherwise they are inferior and should change), but that is no more valid than those of us who are up early decreeing only lazy people sleep past 6am, so we will raise people sleeping at 6.30am for our parcels - because our whole house is up by then, so should yours be... Obviously insane. Common sense required in noticing dark house, not prescriptive universally acceptable times.

BettyMoody.. I suggest you grow up, not the OP. What was that comment for? I hardly think she needs to grow up because she was annoyed by her neighbour knocking on her door loudly and being rude to her.

Really and truly not too late. Yes you might have been in bed but most adults aren't at that time.

Why don't you think it's too late, chrome100