Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Original poster

To ask if this would put you off using the childminder?

212 replies

Writerwannabe83 · 02/10/2014 19:30

Me and DH are currently in the process of searching for a childminder ready for when I return after Maternity. Depending on when I go back DS will be 9 or 12 months of age.

I met two childminders last week and neither of them felt right and the idea of leaving DS with them made me feel quite anxious. I told my DH I didn't want to use either of them. There was nothing specific about them that I didn't like but my gut instinct was that they weren't right for DS.

Tonight we met a 3rd one (and her husband and children) and she was really lovely. I instantly warmed to her, the house was really child friendly and there were toys everywhere and lots of stimulating games and activities and I just felt really comfortable talking to her and being in her company, as did my DH.

However, before we left she mentioned she had 6 dogs There are two poodles, two shnausers (no idea how to spell it) a Doberman and a Bulldog. She showed me where they are kept and they have their own area which although is part of the house they are caged in so don't have access to the main house. It's a nice big space, lots of beds and underfloor heating and they have their own door that leads to their own fenced off and secure part of the garden - they are not able to access the main garden area.

Am I being unreasonable to feel uneasy about the dogs and not send DS to her because of them even though she is perfect in every other way?

My DH thinks I'm worrying too much and he'd have no problem sending DS there. But I just don't know.

OP posts:

bobbyjo · 03/10/2014 06:59

Just read a bit more of the thread and the layout of the house. Absolutely no way. Owners are confident in their dogs usually. Sometimes too confident - oh, little Fluffy wouldn't harm a fly - and that's when mistakes happen. Dogs can turn. You have absolutely no guarantee the dogs will never come in contact with the kids. My dog couldn't even turn a door handle! I can't believe she's got permission from the council for this.

slightlyconfused85 · 03/10/2014 07:18

My cm has two large dogs who are kept away from the childminding area at all times. Dd has been with her 18 months and tbh I never even considered it to be a problem.

Aeroflotgirl · 03/10/2014 07:30

You came on a pre arranged day, she found gave hoovered up the mess, and tidied up and got everything looking just so. Drop in unexpectedly during the day to see how it really is when she has her mindees with her. 6 dogs requir a lot of looking after, even during the day. She has to remember she us running a childcare business, not a dogs home.

MidniteScribbler · 03/10/2014 07:30

Six is a pack, but that doesn't mean they automatically turn in to feral beasts because there is more than one. Even people with only one dog are a pack as the humans are also part of their packs. Regardless of how many dogs you own, responsible owners will ensure that their dogs are well trained, well managed and not a nuisance or danger. In fact, people with large packs of dogs need to be strong alphas, as opposed to someone with their little Fluffy-Snooky-Muggingtons who gets carried around all day, hand fed their gourmet chicken from the owners plate and thinks that they rule the roost. You just can't have that happen with a large pack of dogs. I have eight (four entire females, two desexed females and two entire (experienced stud) males), and I am unquestionably top dog in my house. You need to understand pack structure, and if you do, then life is actually pretty harmonious because every dog understands their place and is happy there.

Aeroflotgirl · 03/10/2014 07:30

Yes there is always tge potential fir something to happen, more so with 6 dogs.

Booboostoo · 03/10/2014 08:30

Would you be put off a CM if her next door neighbour had six dogs? Probably not and rightly so. This is similar as the dogs are kept separate from the children...unless you don't trust her on this in which case why trust her on anything?

Six dogs are not necessarily a problem indeed someone who has six non-barking, well behaved dogs really knows what they are doing. How do you know how she looks after her dogs? I know people who get up at 5am to look after pets before work and then again keep going till 8pm after work all for their animals. Perhaps her DH and adult DC take responsibility for the dogs while she works.

As for dirt, etc, you did say her house was clean and you would see it everyday, not to mention that two or more dogs in the house with DCs under two help prevent asthma.

Original poster

Writerwannabe83 · 03/10/2014 08:40

Thanks everyone for all your replies. Her DH works shifts and leaves the house at 3am but is back by late afternoon so maybe he takes them for walks then? Their eldest son has learning disabilities and health problems so wouldn't have anything to do with the dogs.

The crazy thing is that when my sister's two children were youngish (3 and 5) there was an Alsatian in the house and I worried endlessly for their safety. Whenever I see anything on the news about young babies or children being attacked by dogs I think to myself "why do people have these dogs when their are young children in the house?!" When MIL announced half way through my pregnancy they she was thinking of getting a little dog my first thought was, "Fait enough but I won't be taking the baby to visit."

I'm not saying my thoughts and feelings above were rational but I don't understand the logic of me having those concerns but now considering sending my baby to a home where there are 6 dogs, to be under the care of someone I don't know and not being there to supervise DS myself.

What's wrong with me?!

I've slept on it overnight but still don't feel like I know what to do

OP posts:

Nanny0gg · 03/10/2014 08:42

Talk to her!!

TeracottaTurtle · 03/10/2014 08:48

No way. I wouldn't even consider it.

I'm sure they're lovely and soft and wouldn't hurt a fly and so well trained etc...fab. Take that risk with your own child. I wouldn't let someone take it with mine though.

I'm a dog lover. But tbh unless you live on a farm (or have a huuuge house and a lot of land) I think 6 dogs is a ridiculous amount to have.

TeracottaTurtle · 03/10/2014 08:51

Would you be put off a CM if her next door neighbour had six dogs?

If they had an inter-connecting door to the CMs house then yes I would tbh...which is the situation here. There is a door separating them, which can be opened. There is no way for the CM to 100% guarantee that the dc will never have contact when in the same house.

What if two of the dogs had a scrap that went a bit far and she could hear one of them whining/howling? Would she just ignore and leave them to it?

Aeroflotgirl · 03/10/2014 08:52

Well I would do an unannounced visit to see how things are run during the day. If when you get there she is avasive or cagey, you know your answer. If she invites you in to look around and to ask her further questions than that very good.

ChocolateWombat · 03/10/2014 08:52

I would say, keep looking at other childminders.
Although you like this woman,the set-up is not ideal if you feel unsettled about the dogs.
Arrange to visit some more.....there maybe other child minders you like too, who don't have 6 dogs.

6 dogs is unusual and will be something that puts many people off. The childminder should know this, so actually, it should be one of the very first things she mentions, before people even visit her home.
I am a dog lover, but I think it is incompatible with childminding. One or possibly 2 dogs is fine. So many are a potential risk. I would equally say that childminding with 6 cats or other large numbers of that kind of pet is not ideal. There are allergies, safety issues etc. Yes, it is the childminders home, but as it is a place where children spend their time and that she earns her living from, I don't think it is appropriate for a childminder........or perhaps more accurately, it is fine for her to have 6 dogs of course, but then childminding is not the job for her.

Keep looking.

Aeroflotgirl · 03/10/2014 08:54

I personally would not, but if you like her then ask her further questions. If tge next door neighbour had 6 dogs yes it would put me off, it would depend on how secure the fences are.

Original poster

Writerwannabe83 · 03/10/2014 09:06

I'm seeing another childminder next week and another one has agreed to see me in November when she is back off her holiday. I'm also eating for another two to contact me to arrange a visit.

I definitely want to meet some more so I can make my decision based on seeing a range of services offered.

A few people have mentioned Nurseries but it's just not for me - not whilst DS is so young anyway.

OP posts:

Original poster

Writerwannabe83 · 03/10/2014 09:06

I'm seeing another childminder next week and another one has agreed to see me in November when she is back off her holiday. I'm also eating for another two to contact me to arrange a visit.

I definitely want to meet some more so I can make my decision based on seeing a range of services offered.

A few people have mentioned Nurseries but it's just not for me - not whilst DS is so young anyway.

OP posts:

fairyfuckwings · 03/10/2014 09:07

I'd be concerned about the smell to be honest. It sounds like she's making the area safe but surely her house smells? I can often smell dogs on dog owners. I think they get used to the smell themselves but I can always smell it. They're not the most hygienic of creatures...

Bouttimeforwine · 03/10/2014 09:30

Do the dogs interact in the family environment at night and weekends or are they always in that area? I think that is crucial. Are they used to actually being with kids?

I would need to know that if one or more, happened to escape and get in with the kids in the house or garden, then that would be a normal environment for them. If they are never allowed in the main house, or they don't normally mix with kids, then their behaviour can't be predicted if they escape somehow.

Actually I'm not sure I'd be happy with 6 of them. They can't all be normal, well socialised family pets. It's just too many.

mutternutter · 03/10/2014 09:44

How clean is the house with six dogs? One OK six about five too many. I say this as a dog owner. Not a chance would I leave my DC there.

magimedi · 03/10/2014 09:50

If you are unsure about it now, when you don't have to leave your DC there you are not going to feel any better about it when the time comes for you to go back to work.

And I agree with the poster who said that it all looked great but the CM knew you were coming.

It sounds as if you have a large pool to choose from - 6 dogs would have me worried as I don't understand how she can cope with that many animals & extra children.

slanleat · 03/10/2014 09:56

I would have to say I am relieved to read you are meeting other childminders. You said in your opening post you wanted to go with your gut and its telling you that six dogs are not such a good idea!

No way would I put my son into that house.

Original poster

Writerwannabe83 · 03/10/2014 09:57

I'm guessing the dogs are used to children due to the CM having 2 young ones herself. She minds two other children who are brothers aged 5 and 8. The CM said the dogs are allowed access to the house just not when visitors are there (due to the causing a distraction) or during the times she is minding children that aren't her own. The dogs don't have access to the main garden though, just their own section.

OP posts:

Original poster

Writerwannabe83 · 03/10/2014 09:57

OP posts:

MidniteScribbler · 03/10/2014 09:59

Actually I'm not sure I'd be happy with 6 of them. They can't all be normal, well socialised family pets. It's just too many.

::head desk::

Are you kidding me????

Imsosorryalan · 03/10/2014 10:01

I've had dogs in dogs in the past, and yes I also have young children. Sometimes, there is no way of knowing when a dog can snap and with 6 dogs who knows if ones feeling ill, is injured or just in a bad mood.
It's a big risk to take with young children. Also, you mentioned they are in the conservatory separated by a large stair fate. Doe a it have gaps in between? As what's stopping your child putting their hands in between the bars to 'pet' the dogs?

I'd keep looking...

Bouttimeforwine · 03/10/2014 10:02

So they don't interact with visitors then, due to the distraction? They are only used to the family.

Definitely a no then. Too unpredictable.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9