To be tired of teachers exaggerating

[onarailwaytrain]

Dd and DS (twins) in year 11 at the moment and all we have heard is how they have to get their GCSEs, their lives will be ruined if they don't, they will never get to college and never get a good job. Etc.

Dd in particular is unlikely to get many cs or above. AIBU in thinking the teachers should back off a bit?

OP I meant MY point was obvious, no one else's.

I'm not patronising you. I (along with other people on this thread) don't agree with you.

Telling them to fuck off, says more about you and your attitude than anything else.

I haven't got a job! I am retired.
I just think it bizarre that teachers are judged on results as in
Top maths group, all get A* = wonderful teacher
Bottom maths group only a few get C = poor teacher.
NOT - ' how fantastic that 6 of the bottom group achieved a C'.
At one time pupils were treated differently according to their needs. Now they all have to get to a certain level. Nothing counts unless it is academic.

I do think everyone needs to be urged into action or how will it change?
I agree that the teacher's attitude is unacceptable but changing it is just the short term- what happens next year or the year after?

I thought you were a bit rude dinosaur

Didn't you make some comment about earning £7.90 and hour and level of academic achievement?

Sorry if that wasn't you

What is wrong in urging everyone into action? Mine have gone through - I expect it will have been proved a failure by the time I have grandchildren. It is those who might face it that need to fight it.

I don't want to be unhelpful but everyone saying 'YANBU they should back off' ( and I would agree with that statement) is no use.
You have to do something- if only tackling the teacher/HofY/Head.

You may think I'm rude but I haven't told anyone to fuck off Rufus.

The only reason I brought up the OP's pay and academics is because she mentioned her pay and claimed teachers are well paid. Given most teachers do a degree and a post grad qualification, before they are even eligible to join the profession, how anyone can claim they are well paid is beyond me.

And no I'm not a teacher.

I agree I shouldn't have told anyone to fuck off, that was rude of me and I apologise but it was on the back of a particularly unpleasant comment about maybe I will get someone who cares about DCs education.

Delphiniums I do see what you're trying to do but I didn't start the thread as a crusade and I have to admit the posts telling me I haven't understood your posts have wound me up a bit as I'm not stupid.

I do earn £7.90 an hour, I do an extremely worthwhile job that happens to be badly paid. Without me, your mums, grannies, dads and grandads would be wet, starving, miserable and confused and cold. It isn't paid well in monetary terms but is is well paid in my heart sappy as it sounds!

Perhaps we should just leave it as YANBU and the teachers should back off'- I don't think anyone has disagreed with that.
I was just trying to be helpful - believe it or not!

(I am never one for just being sympathetic without anything practical- probably a failing if people just want the sympathy).

Fair enough delphiniums but yes I'd actually appreciate backing off now, I did say that a few pages ago.

DCs have been very distressed and (understandably I think) that's where my concern has lay.

I will give my last word- I appreciate you are fed up with me.
You will have to tackle the school and get them to back off.

(Final word however much I get tempted to come back)

I don't keep swearing at all. I swore in a couple of posts as I was extremely angry and frustrated at the posts that were wilfully misreading the situation as two idle teenagers.

Delphiniums is free to post as she wishes, but as I have explained, I have understood her posts but she seemed to think for a long time I didn't, which meant we were posting at odds with one another and was frustrating on both sides I daresay as I was concerned about two suicidal teens where her posts seem to focus more on the general impact.

If I'd known the thread would be on the front page 2 days later I would never have started it and to be honest I wish I'd posted in special needs as I just don't think all of you understand the position I am coming from which is ironic as so many posts have demanded I understand the position of the teachers.

I am not unsympathetic but there is simply not an excuse for saying nasty and scornful things about people who do not achieve C grades at GCSE, I haven't said anything to the school but I was a bit frustrated and annoyed myself.

Chilli that is a disgraceful attitude!! You are supposed to care about the children you teach and prepare them for their future. Not your future, which seems to be your primary concern. I think you are in the wrong job!
A further point I would like to make, is that schools are 'hell bent' on hitting academic targets but forget that all children are not necessarily academic. We also need plumbers, electricians, joiners etc. These skills are not learned at school, so don't write off children who are not academic, as there is a whole world out there, after leaving school.

Cool as, I am sorry, I really am.

But I did not start this thread to understand teachers better. I started it because I had two upset teenagers at home.

I have spent years drumming into both children to show their teachers respect - I have once and only once made remotely negative contact with a school and that was in year 1 when I pleaded with the teacher that I knew how busy she was but if she could help dd find just one of seven lost cardigans I would be so grateful!

But I'm the bad nasty one because I have criticised teachers? I just don't see how that works. Believe me I have a very difficult job working with people with dementia and I have been physically assaulted a number of times because they are frightened and confused. But if I was verbally abusive I couldn't blame the stress of my job as I'm working with vulnerable people. I see it the same way with teachers I'm sorry and if you think it's inflammatory to say so the yes I'm being inflammatory. I think some of my DCs teachers are out of order.

Oh for heaven's sake grannymcphee.
I care deeply about the students I teach. I want them to do the best they can. That's what teachers do.
BUT the system in which teachers work means that the results the students get affects my pay. If they do better than expected, I don't get paid more. If they do worse than expected, I get paid less. That affects my children. My children come first. Sorry if that's wrong.

I don't think it's wrong at all chile, but it also applies to me, my children come first before your mortgage.

I'm not going to apologise for that being wrong!

Railway I'm not pissed off exactly but it's upsetting as delphiniums seems to want to urge me and other mums into action. I get that but I didn't start the thread to moan about the system. I was looking for support and understanding - mumsnet is normally hot on sen stuff so you can see why I'm upset.

I think if you were only wanting sympathy you maybe posted in the wrong forum? Let me start by saying that I do have every sympathy for your DCs - they are clearly in a no win situation and their confidence is being eroded. It's crap. But, I do think Delphiniums (and others) have a very valid point. I get that you want sympathy but that isn't really going to help your DC. What they, and others, need is for the system to be changed. And the best way to do that is to put pressure on policy makers. I really don't understand why you're so upset that someone wants to change a crap system into one that would benefit less academically gifted children much more.

Onarailwaytrain, you are right. There is no excuse for teachers to bully, and I fully agree, I do support work too and it is never acceptable. However, because teachers have a disciplinary role SOME seem to use borderline intimidation. But that's probably a whole other thread....

Permanently, it wasn't exactly sympathy but I suppose recognition. Recognition of the fact that my DCs aren't academic but they are worthwhile.

I get what delphiniums was trying to do and I appreciate her points but my objections came with the insistence that I didn't understand who I did and that in fact the teachers are right and I don't believe they are. And I am afraid it is pretty galling to be told you don't understand something when you do!

I think it's a bit off to say I 'only wanted sympathy' when I think the majority of sympathy on this thread has not gone to my DCs but to teachers and I won't lie - I think that is the wrong way around.

What did you want OP?

But onarailwaytrain, that's called motherhood. In your world, your children come first. But in my world, my children come first. Before yours. That's why we will never agree on this.