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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have binned DP's microwave?

120 replies

Nohootingchickenssleeping · 27/09/2014 23:27

Spent all day in hospital with a head injury so feeling ill, tired and emotional.

DP cooked fish in my house last night. He's left the microwave filthy and stinking of fish that was out of date when he cooked it. It's stunk my whole house out and the smell has nearly made me vomit and burst into tears.

So I used every ounce of strength and threw the microwave into the wheely bin.

He's gonna kill me, he's had it since he was eighteen and it was lent to me on the condition I look after it. It was on its last legs but he doesn't like throwing stuff out and he'll also be upset that it was just tossed and not recycled.

AIBU to have binned it rather than clean it? I'm vegetarian and I hate the smell of fish above anything.

OP posts:
partialderivative · 28/09/2014 07:12

That's a very snidey comment Euphemia. Why the 'so called'?

It has nothing to do with the OP's issue.

3pigsinblanketsandasausagerole · 28/09/2014 07:23

I would do this

Can't imagine anything worse than house stinking of rotting fish

misanthropologist · 28/09/2014 07:25

YANBU. His nasty cooked fish, his responsibility to not only a) de-funk the microwave, but also and more importantly b) ensure the de-stinking of your home. He was BVU to make a horrible smell and just walk away assuming you'd either put up with it or handle it yourself, regardless of the concussion (which just makes him that much more U, in my mind). I'd have been sore tempted to put the stinky micro into a binbag, call a friend and ask them to drop off the parcel on his doorstep.

Flipflops7 · 28/09/2014 07:27

YABVU, it's not yours to throw away.

Also hoarders don't have nice little filing systems, as a rule (apart from the hoarders that keep museum-like collections of things).

BravePotato · 28/09/2014 07:28

Put it in the shed, nit unreasonable to remove it from your your living environment

Flipflops7 · 28/09/2014 07:31

On the flip side, cooking fish was insensitive and I can imagine the effect it would have on you as a non-meat eater, after a head injury. Ugh. But try to recover it and put it somewhere safe for him to clean, then ask him to refrain until you are better.

Catzeyess · 28/09/2014 07:37

Yabu if you were healthy but yanbu because of the head injury. I totally understand.

I had a concussion and it was horrible. Just walking gave me a headache and I felt sick constantly. I would yell at DH for random stuff, we had some chicken in the fridge that went off and the smell made me sob (I'm not usually that dramatic). Concussion can make you a bit loopy temporarily.

It will be ok - but get off your phone/computer and rest, try and avoid screens Thanks feel better soon xxx

EveDallasRetd · 28/09/2014 07:45

Christ, my (new) microwave cost £22 from Tesco. I threw my old one out when we moved because I couldn't be arsed to clean it (I rarely use it, DH does and I refuse to clean up after him). Who in their right mind gets this sentimental over a bloody microwave?

I'd leave the old stinky one in the bin. If he goes off on one tell him he can get it out the bin and clean it if he wants it.

LindyHemming · 28/09/2014 07:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

combust22 · 28/09/2014 08:03

Anyone else find this thread surreal?

Microwave/head injury/rotten fish.......

Where is the DP if the OP has a head injury? Don't DPs usually support us through such things?

FunkyBoldRibena · 28/09/2014 08:08

Doesn't cleaning it after use also constitute 'looking after it'? Why is that her job and not his?

Anyway, it is a microwave. The bin is the best place for it. OP hope you are feeling better this morning.

PitchSlapped · 28/09/2014 08:13

The thing i find most surreal is that people seem to think its the ops responsibility to clean it. I would text him and tell him its in the bin and that you dont want it anymore because its revolting, and if he wants it he should come and get it

WhoKnowsWhereTheTimeGoes · 28/09/2014 08:14

Put it in the shed and let him deal with it.

I've also got a 1994 Panasonic that's still going strong and my parents microwave dates back to about 1984, more reliable than any other appliance I've owned.

MokunMokun · 28/09/2014 08:19

I would wrap it up in a bin bag and return it to him stinking. You can buy a new cheap microwave for yourself and ban him from using it.

Hope you feel better soon!

sharonthewaspandthewineywall · 28/09/2014 08:24

Just pretend you used it and it exploded. It's given up the ghost sorry

bananaleaf · 28/09/2014 08:26

YANBU. Ordinarily I would not throw out something I had borrowed but if he wants to be so thoughtless and disrespectful then bad luck I say, although I may just have put it outside rather than in the actual bin. If he treasures it that much he shouldn't have left it in such a state.

formerbabe · 28/09/2014 08:26

Oh he's a hoarder...makes more sense now (in a way!). Yanbu...I'd question if a 12 year old microwave is even fit for purpose anymore..was it knackered or in a good condition? Considering you can get a new one for about £30, its ridiculous.

How long have you been together?

notagainffffffffs · 28/09/2014 08:34

Nah I would just buy a new one. Its a microwave!

Fairenuff · 28/09/2014 08:36

Him being a hoarder makes no difference. He should still have cleaned it. In fact he should not have cooked the fish in the first place if he knew it would stink OP's house out. Very inconsiderate.

formerbabe · 28/09/2014 08:39

Hoarders aren't renowned for a high level of cleanliness! If I was the op, I'd watch some of those hoarding documentaries and have a good think.

PiggyontheRailway · 28/09/2014 08:46

Regardless of how old it is or how it smelt it doesn't belong to you, you should pack it away and tell him to come and get it.
I lived with a controlling bully for 20 years and this sounds like something he would have done with or without the head injury. You would have been right to wrap it up any put it somewhere and read him the riot act about microwaving fish in your house.
What he has done is bad what you have done is down right nasty.

Nanny0gg · 28/09/2014 08:52

She's come out of hospital with a very sore head and nausea.
She is home alone
She is vegetarian
She is faced with fish having been cooked in her house leaving a dreadful stink

I think she's been quite restrained, actually.

Nanny0gg · 28/09/2014 08:53

What he has done is bad what you have done is down right nasty

Slight over-reaction? It's a microwave, not a family heirloom.

thegreylady · 28/09/2014 08:58

Get it out of the bin and put it outside in a plastic bag then tell him why you have done it. You c an't just bin something lent to you just give it back. Why was he cooking off fish anyway? Maybe it wasn't off just smelt fishy (as fish does).

redexpat · 28/09/2014 09:02

Im withnanny. Respect goes 2 ways. He disrespected her first by not considering the effect of his actions pn her. I also think if you insost someone look after it then you should do that too. Fishing his precious microwave out of the bin might make him be more considerate of other peoples needs in future.