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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I got my boss arrested

123 replies

HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 14:51

I know this isn't the right board but I have no idea where to put it.
I'm nervous about sharing any details but the general gist is that I called the police on my boss after overhearing them beat one of their children.
Social services have called me asking for all details of them previous to this and they asked so many questions and didn't seem to believe me - asking why I hadn't reported before (boss has been bad before) etc.
I'm really worried that they don't believe me (even though I have evidence) and that I lost my job and part of my sanity for nothing.
If anyone on here is a social worker - or knows a social worker - could reassure or advise that would be great.
I'm sorry for the vagueness but I don't want to make things worse.

OP posts:
Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 14:51

Long time poster here, btw, just name changed for obvious reasons

OP posts:
LadyLuck10 · 23/09/2014 14:53

Firstly if you are certain of him abusing his kids, then you've done the absolutely right thing by reporting him.
He probably can't fire you just based on that.

Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 14:53

Boss didn't fire me, I just left. Seemed the safest and most unconfrontational way

OP posts:
Stealthpolarbear · 23/09/2014 14:54

It sounds shit op but you have done the right thing. Thank youm

PansOtherPeople · 23/09/2014 14:55

'Beating' children is a crime and rightly so. You've done the right thing and didn't turn a deaf ear, like so many would. What makes you think you will lose your job? Are you in a trade union?

The child/ren will thank you.

Stealthpolarbear · 23/09/2014 14:55

Is there a mrs boss?

AlpacaLypse · 23/09/2014 14:55

You couldn't have not reported this and retained your self respect.

Hope someone who works in the field will be along soon to reassure you.

Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 14:55

I was the Nanny.

OP posts:
DancingDinosaur · 23/09/2014 14:56

Why didn't you report it before? I'm glad you have now, but I guess the bigger picture needs to be looked at, including a case of sour grapes, leaving your job etc.

DearGirl · 23/09/2014 14:57

Are you a nanny?

IrishBloodEnglishHeart · 23/09/2014 14:57

I would think that they have to ask lots of questions, not because they don't believe you but because they need to be absolutely sure and clear of the situation before they proceed down any path.

Just tell the truth and know you are doing the right thing.

I am very sorry that this is costing you your job and obvious stress. It will pass.

PansOtherPeople · 23/09/2014 14:58

Nanny - thought so after thinking about it. Who else hears bosses beating children. How do you feel about it now? A sense of pride should be in there, overcoming your own difficulties as a result of reporting.

Paraibalove · 23/09/2014 14:59

Good for you. I would have done the same in your position- I'm not sure how you could continue in your job either but very very difficult. I really hope those children get the protection they need- you've done everything you can do.

I hope you've got enough proof to satisfy the authorities.

Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 14:59

I had no evidence - just what I had heard going on in other rooms or that boss was aggressive, shouty and unreasonable.
I saw the evidence of the beating (nasty nasty marks that looked like whipping and a buckle mark) took photos, put the kids to bed, walked out, called 101 and didn't ever go back.

OP posts:
gentlehoney · 23/09/2014 14:59

It is good that social services are checking the details thoroughly and making sure it is not a malicious call.
All you can do is tell the truth and hope they can prove it.

furcoatbigknickers · 23/09/2014 15:00

You did the right thingFlowers

LemonBreeland · 23/09/2014 15:00

What an awful situation. you really have done the right thing.

Hopefully they are asking so many questions to get a full picture of the situation.

BastardGoDarkly · 23/09/2014 15:00

Oh op, that's truly shit.

I'm not a sw, but wanted to say thanks on behalf of those poor kids.

I know you can't say what, but it's the proof solid?

If so, all will be fine, good luck Flowers

PansOtherPeople · 23/09/2014 15:01

how old are the children? Their stories will back up yours, so long as beater doesn't have a chance to threaten them any further before they are interviewed.

Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 15:01

Up until the SS call I felt terrified, guilty but a deep sense of having done the right thing.
It's been over a month and I've had nightmares about it every single night. But boss is very very wealthy and good at talking and negotiating.
The social worker I'm sure was just getting info but I felt so awful.

OP posts:
furcoatbigknickers · 23/09/2014 15:02

Well done collecting evidence. I think you were right to hold out for that. Hopefully now the dcs will be safe. Your boss is an animal and deserves jail. Angry

Original poster
HelpMe123 · 23/09/2014 15:02

Pans - I'd rather not give out that information but I'm pretty sure kids would say what boss told them to.

OP posts:
highlighta · 23/09/2014 15:03

Those poor poor children. Well done OP, you know you have done the right thing. Good luck for finding a new position.

furcoatbigknickers · 23/09/2014 15:03

He can't negotiate out of this I wouldnt have thought

BeggingYourPardon · 23/09/2014 15:04

They will grill you regarding what happened as I'm sure your boss will be denying it all or will have his own version of events.

Repeat exactly what happened, each time they ask. Be confident in yourself and your answers.

He may be saying its was a light slap while you claim it was a full fist punch if you see what I mean.

Well done for reporting it, somebody cares for the children if he doesn't!