To rehome or not?

[snork1]

We have had a dog for about a year but around three weeks ago he bit my son. It was an accident, my son is only three and fell on the dog and the dog was startled and bit my son but it frightened the hell out of both me and my husband and obviously the my child.
The dog is a terrier and has always been quite nervy, not with us but other people. He goes bonkers when people come to the door and then leaps all over them, not in a good-wanting-a-fuss way but a please-leave-my-house-way. We have had various behavioirists in and vet advice and so now distract him but it is always quite difficult to manage this behaviour. Now I love this dog, with all his quirks and bonkers ways but my husband doesn't, he has never really bonded with the dog. He wants me to rehome, he says he is tense all the time around the dog wondering if this will happen again. He says its not safe having other kids in the house to play. I have been trying to keep everyone apart and it is stressful and sometimes very difficult. He is massive pressure on me to find another home, when I tentatively rand round a few shelters, no-one, I mean no-one would even touch him because he has bitten, despite the extenuating circumstances.I mentioned this and my husband said that maybe putting him down was the only option and I was completely shattered and horrified. I feel so cut up inside about all this, there is such a tense, difficult atmosphere and I weep every time I look at the dog but I feel like my hand is being forced and that it is seriously effecting all the family. I have a seven year old who loves the dog but my husband is so wary he hardly lets her go near her. I have to admit it was pretty terrifying to see the dog lunge at my boy like that and I am worried it may happen again because who can foresee something like that happening??. I am at my wits end and losing sleep about it all. Looking at it rationally the dog is probably not a good fit for a chaotic young family and probably needs a calmer, adult home but am at a loss and don't know where to turn. Added to all this crap we are moving in four weeks and it all feels so stressful and unfair. I am massively beating myself up about it.

Well there you go OP, happyandsingle has just volunteered to take on your dog.

Well if it was that or put a healthy animal down I would take it in. Cannot believe how many on here are suggesting putting it down on the basis of what happened to op. There are a lot of warped opinions on here.

Well done Happyandsingle for not reading anything I have said and jumping to ridiculous conclusions. There is not fucking hostile attitude to the dog. You can make any thing up you want and believe whatever crap you want but that is not the situation. Of course the dog reacted badly, can't you read?? I stated it was an accident, we are all well aware of that. Idiocy. And no, you can't have my dog. You sound nuts.

your husband doesnt want the dog, and hes bitten your child on the face.

Get the dog rehomed. Im a dog lover, have two staffies and 3 kids. They may have grumbled if the kids were being boisterous, but biting is another matter, and a bite to leave two holes in his face is NOT a nip.
The dog is a liability and even if youre willing to take the risk with your child, your husband doesnt want to.

I'm a get-rid-of-it person. Which do you love more? Your DC or the dog?

You should not own a dog with that attitude. And no I am completly sane thanks, I just respect animals.

I always said if mine bit DSD they'd be out, and u stand by it but I would of hoped I'd done a better job raising them. Female dog is a rescue, try a breed specific rescue if you want the dog gone.

Happyandsingle is the only person making sense. You don't kill animals because you don't find them to be your exact specifications.
Do not own dogs with small children. Why is that hard? Don't put dogs down. Again easy. It seriously twisted that people kill dogs because they don't act exactly as you want them to.

I have a scar on my lip and face from a recent dog snap. I startled her, and my face was in the way when she reacted with one single snap motion. Went to a job interview the next day with 4 stitches and a massive lip. It was an accident. Actually, it wasn't. It was my fault - I acted as if I was far more familiar with / to the dog than I should have. Thankfully, there was no discussion whatsover of rehoming or worse - we cleaned me up and took me to the docs, end of story. A single snap from a dog can easily puncture soft tissue on the face.

However, this situation clearly isn't working, for dog or family. Hope rehoming works out.

Sorry OP but you need to rehome the dog, maybe try local papers and find a nice quiet home for him with no DC if the rescues are full, there are often people who simply don't want to pay the fees rescue centers charge but would love a dog, if it was just a nip then i could understand giving him a chance but 2 puncture marks is a proper bite and your DH is completely right not to let him near the DC.

Even a little terrier can do considerable damage to a child even if you are in the room with them, I have scars on my cheek from a yorkshire terrier, my mum was sat less than 6 foot from me when it snapped and attacked me, admittedly I had woken it up to stroke it, I was 4 and ignored my grandmothers warning not to, so it was very much my fault and frankly i was over it and back to asking to stroke every dog i saw by the next day but it had snapped before and my mum still feels guilty for keeping a dog that she knew might bite if frightened.

I haven't read the thread. Am at work on my phone.

I do know someone who is after a terrier provided it's good with other dogs. It's a very good home. The man is home all day and the dogs are walked on the beach for 90 minutes daily. You'd have to get the dog to us in teesside though.

I don't think this dog needs to be pts. It was a normal fear reaction. My own terrier nipped and bruised dd2 when she was young. She learned not to do somersaults in the dogs direction after that. The dog learned laying in the middle of the room was perhaps not the best plan.

There is plenty you can do which can improve the situation which I'm sure has already been suggested (crates, baby gates, supervision, apbc trainer etc) if you want to keep the dog.

This is not, imo, a reason to give up on an otherwise friendly dog.

We have had a dog for about a year but around three weeks ago he bit my son

The rest is irrelevant. He bit your son.

It'd be irresponsible to keep him. Give him to a no kill shelter and tell them he can't be in a home with children.

It doesn't work like that. You can't just give your dog to a no kill shelter. They are all full.

Having now read the thread this is what I'd do:

1. rehome the husband.
2. give the dog a bed in an out of the way place where he cannot be fallen on (eg under a corner table)
3. teach the dog this is best place in the house to be (clicker training, hiding treats in the bed, giving treats/praise every time the dog goes to bed)
4. teach the toddler to never, ever go near anywhere near the dogs bed. Clicker training works on toddlers also
5. "employ" the dog. An unemployed terrier will find his own job. In your case guest chasing. It's a terrier thing. They need much more than just physical exercise. Join an obedience or agility class. Do mini training sessions a few times a day.
6. Crate train. If you are not able to supervise/separate child/dog use the crate.

How old is the dog OP?

I don't think the OP should have the dog PTS because it bit her child out of fear/pain. I think the OP should have the dog PTS if there are no other re homing options. Rescues are full to the brim, there are unscrupulous people out there who are not genuine re homers and re homing a dog with a history of biting is more challenging than just rehiring a dog. In such circumstances the OP has to be realistic. If she can find a good home brilliant, if not then PTS is a really tough option for the owner but the dog won't know any different and it is the responsible thing to do. There are worse fates for an animal than PTS.

That sounds like excellent advice, Cleanin. I hadn't picked up on it being a terrier and yes, I agree –they like to be busy, not just exercised.

I appreciate the advice but really all this is irrelevant. Yes, the dog is exercised and trained every day and crate-trained and yes, he has a 'job' and we hide his food and give him puzzles and kongs and bury treats and we play 'find it' which he is great at and we throw endless balls. Yes, the dog has a bed, far away from the kids, baby-gated off in the kitchen, crate in the corner under a shelf, yes, the kids know NEVER to go into the dog's bed and never have, yes, the dog is clicker-trained and has been to classes. Yes, he will 'go to mat' if you ask him to and he is treated and given a chew. Yes, to all this and more but this has not stopped this accident happening and it has happened and the fact is my husband is worried and I don't blame my husband for being worried and no, I don't want to get rid of my DH, he is a kind man who cares for his kids and no, I don't really want to get rid of the dog but I think I am being selfish for that and I realise that I would never,ever forgive myself if it happened again. My son has a scar and it could have been worse, much worse. I think the dog needs a quiet, adult home and he will be a great little dog for someone but sadly not us, so it is up to me to find one that is suitable and give him the best chance and though it upsets me to lose him I know its not fair on anyone to keep him.
I appreciate everyone answering but I really wish I hadn't posted now. Not one of you will ever have the full story and are just leaping to conclusions, mostly wrong ones. I would never have the dog PTS unless I thought he really was agressive and therefore felt unable to pass him on to another owner.

Snork, I feel for you. At the end of the day, you have to do what is best for your FAMILY not the dog. I don't know if I have missed this, how is your DC with the dog/s, does he seem scared of them or is he not bothered?

I would try and rehome ASAP. You will never be able to relax again otherwise. You just Can't take any chances with your children. If a dog bit my child on the face I would want it PTS the very same day but I am fully expecting to be flamed to hell and back for that!

If you can't find a rescue willing to take him I offered a home up there ^.

It's a genuine offer. References can be given by local rescues for both myself and the person wanting a terrier.

The only catch is he has 3 other dogs so can only take on dog friendly dogs.

leaping to conclusions

Or, put another way, answering in view of the info we've been given. It can never be the full story; that's the nature of posting on here.

Yes, some people have cried 'PTS' and cast aspersions on you as an owner, but not everyone. Most people are trying to help, and if some of us have suggested things that you've already done/tried/thought of, well, we are not psychic and (mostly) it has been meant helpfully.

Please enlighten me booboostoo what worst fate is there for a dog than being pts?

I can enlighten you happyandsingle, used as dogbait , used in dog fights? That's why they say you should always charge for pets to put people off. I appreciate the offer of a potential home, really I do Dooinmecleanin but I can't for definite say he will get on with three other dogs, just as if I put you in a room with three other people could I say if you would take to them straight away. I can only say, he has always been fine with the dogs we meet on walks, a bit leapy and playful and excited to see them but perfectly ok. The problem is I can't give him away then take him back if it all goes wrong, it would be devastating enough for the kids to see him go once.

That's fine OnlyLovers but one can read the thread properly and one can ask then suggest.

I wouldn't expect anything less than leapy and excited from a terrier

The offer is always there if you find you can't find a place for him. Good luck.

Snork id be biting doins' hand off if i were you. Seriously, if i was going to rehome my dog via anyone on mnet it would be through doin. I understand your reticence as you must be heartbroken to have to give him up. Fwiw i have two terriers. Ddog1 can be very dog reactive and we were told ddog2 was the same. He came from dogs trust. We have never ever had a problem. They play fight and drive me nuts but its never aggressive. Ddog1 saves that for dogs he meets on walks the fucker.

I do think you are under estimating how difficult it will be to find him a suitable hone. Especially as he has bitten so please think about doin's offer, if she says it is a good hone, it will be. Another offer might be a long time in coming and i would hate for you to be faced with pts as the only option after not investigating this one.

In all honesty if my dp forced me to pts my dog in these circumstances in not sure i could forgive him.

I think you should put the work into keeping the dogs and kids separate for another year or so by which point kids will know how to behave around dog and be le less likely to accidentally tread on him etc.

Dog sounds lovely, bite was clearly an instinct reaction to pain and not just general aggression.